Excellent! You have started a rewrite.
It has turned out nicely. But.... OCATO AS EMPEROR!!
Well, I suspected as much. Personally, I think he was behind the whole Oblivion Crisis in the first place. You can never trust Altmer!
2
Baurus and I entered the Temple, where indeed the others had gathered around a table where a single letter was lying, unfolded and with the broken red velvet seal lying next to it in a crumpled ball. Jauffre was standing next to the table, and once we were settled in and all eyes were locked onto him, he read the letter out loud.
A Redguard was caught snooping around the castle courtyards last night, sometime after midnight. The guards asked him what he was doing and he took off faster than a deer. Lucky for us the fool tripped over a rock and sprained his left knee. We threw him into a cell and I started asking him questions, but of course he didn't say a thing. I don't know why, Jauffre, but there's just something about the man I don't like, and I think he's a spy from one of the kingdoms in Hammerfell. I would appreciate it if you came down here immediatly to help me interrogate him. I know you and the Blades have special tricks in getting information.
Jauffre dropped the letter to the table and looked at us for several seconds. Then he spoke with a tired tone. He had been staying up rather late the past few nights, and I'm not sure if he even slept last night. An attempt to steal one of the Elder Scrolls was made two weeks ago, at the Palace in the Imperial City, though the hooded thief got away. Ocato sent some of the scrolls here for us to protect, and Jauffre has been paranoid ever since, which is not like him. Now his beard was at least a week old, and he was getting skinnier by the day. He didn't look too good at all.
"I'll need two people to travel to Anvil and handle the situation, as I am too busy to meddle with this, especially when it is likely something that Langley is wrong about anyhow. It shouldn't be more than a two days ride on horseback. Is there anyone who wants to volunteer?"
Baurus immediatly raised his hand, and I did as well. One being that Baurus was my best friend, and two being that things were boring around the Temple as of late. I hadn't even visited Bruma for three days and it's only a ten minute ride from the Temple!
"Excellent. You two should probably leave now, just so Langley doesn't send me another letter asking where I'm at. I expect a full report on the situation when you get back."
Baurus and I nodded, and then left to gather our gear for the trip. We wouldn't need much, just our Blades uniform and katana of course, and for the most part that's all we would need. I myself would be bringing a fur coat along, just in case I become too cold traveling through the Bruman region. Baurus always makes fun of me for that.
After we had everything we needed we reported to Jauffre one last time, though it was of my begging that we did so. Baurus didn't want to bother him since his door was locked, but I was determined what exactly it was he was doing in his room. I knocked on Jauffre's door, and after a few seconds of silence I knocked again.
This time Jauffre answered the door, with a mean look spread across his face. "What in Oblivion do you want, Cyrus? I'm a little busy in case I didn't make myself clear during the meeting!" He was downright yelling at me, in a rude and cutting way. It hurt me that he was acting like this. Not to where it made me cry, mind you, I am well used to the strictness of Jauffre. But this was different. Ever since those elder scrolls had been handed to us he's never been the same. "Well...what do you want?"
"I just wanted to let you know that Baurus and I are about to leave for Anvil. Is there anything else you wish to tell us?"
"If I had something to say then I would've said it during the meeting," he said rudely. "Just hurry back, will you? I've got enough on my mind without having to worry about Langley's paranoia."
And then he slammed the door in my face.
*****************************************
"No....I've failed him...I've failed my kingdom...what will I do now?"
Stop babbling and figure something out, you twit! You're always crying like an infant! Whatever happened to the old Domas who was never afraid, and never got caught either? What happened to him, hmm? Why is the new Domas such a weakling?
"Shut up! I'm not a weakling! I...I just need some time to figure things out. If father were here he'd-"
Well you know what, weakling? Father ISN'T here...you're by yourself, locked in a cage, about to face the Grandmaster of the Blades...the one association you were supposed to avoid at all costs. You're a failure, Domas. You're a disgrace to your father's name, and even he too was a failure. What does that tell you about yourself, hmm?
"I SAID SHUT UP! Just leave me alone, stop talking to me..."
Than Anvil guard would have been surprised by the Redguard talking to himself. That is he would have if wasn't sleeping outside the cells at his desk, snoring like a bear, oblivious to the talking in the cell room even with the yelling. It was a little after midnight, a day after Domas had been captured and thrown into jail, and no one was present to hear the one man conversation going down in the cells of Anvil. Domas had been placed in a separate cell, in a room away from the other prisoners. This was by the strict order of Langley.
And why should I shut up, Domas? Who else is going to keep you in line? If anything you should be thanking me, not telling me to shut my mouth. If it weren't for me you would have been dead a long time ago.
"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" Domas yelled, covering his years tightly with his dark and dirty hands. But of course that did nothing to help him, and rather only echoed the voice even more.
He never would have hired you if it weren't for me, Domas, and you know it. Without me you'd be the same weakling you've always been. The only reason he doesn't see through you and see the true coward that you really is because I've provided you with a shield.
"SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP!"
And even that is starting to wear off I'm afraid...
Domas rolled up into a ball in the upper right corner of the cell and started to cry, a soft cry filled with self-pity...but above all, fear.
I really like schizo characters and one-man conversations. Keep this up.
Also, I've read a little of the first Excursion of Hammerfell, and it seems that the main character is some guy serving Janus Hassildor in Skingrad, not a Redguard. Has this story changed that much?
Yes, this story is taking a whole new direction.....well, partially I guess. But yes, the main character has changed. I'm glad you like.
Having Domas talking to himself was really hard for me, since I've never done it before.
Interesting take on Cyrodil (and Tamriel in general) you have here, with a fair few whacked out conspiracies developing. I really liked the character of Domas, with his Gollumesque rantings.
Just a note-several of the counts and countesses were opposed to Ocato taking the title of Emperor. Maybe mention it.
I keep a busy schedule to ward off boredom-I'm a very proactive person!
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