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> Teresa of the Faint Smile, Adventures of a Stringy Bosmer
Linara
post Nov 19 2010, 07:20 PM
Post #681


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Joined: 25-September 10
From: Bruma, in a book.



QUOTE(D.Foxy @ Nov 19 2010, 10:13 AM) *

LINARA HAS A DOUBLE BARRELLED D....K????


blink.gif

:jawdrop:

No, a black and white Khajiit wink.gif

This post has been edited by Linara: Nov 21 2010, 09:39 PM


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SubRosa
post Nov 19 2010, 07:23 PM
Post #682


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QUOTE(D.Foxy @ Nov 19 2010, 01:13 PM) *

LINARA HAS A DOUBLE BARRELLED D....K????


I am sure she meant something else...

This post has been edited by SubRosa: Nov 19 2010, 09:46 PM


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Linara
post Nov 19 2010, 07:36 PM
Post #683


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Actually, Linara doesn't know the messes she gets into until she's neck deep in them. Forget I said anything.


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mALX
post Nov 19 2010, 08:19 PM
Post #684


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From: Cyrodiil, the Wastelands, and BFE TN



QUOTE(SubRosa @ Nov 19 2010, 01:23 PM) *

I am sure she means her vagina.


That's Regina in polite company...er...

QUOTE



GAAAAAAG !!!! BLEAH !!!! ** mALX puked on her keyboard... **





QUOTE(Linara @ Nov 19 2010, 01:20 PM) *

QUOTE(D.Foxy @ Nov 19 2010, 10:13 AM) *

LINARA HAS A DOUBLE BARRELLED D....K????


blink.gif

:jawdrop:

Yes, as well as a black and white Khajiit wink.gif




SPEW!!! Hello Carrot Top !!!! Where's Destri? Now that's taking androgyny to a whole new level !!!

This post has been edited by mALX: Nov 19 2010, 08:25 PM


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ureniashtram
post Nov 19 2010, 08:58 PM
Post #685


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jdsfhweufhsdfjnsdfnsdufhwbgf
fshfusdhofsdfhusdofhsd

Oh, I'm sorry. I was cleaning my keyboard (don't ask what it is I'm cleaning) because SOME INTERACTIONS above this post made me lose my midnight snacks.

So much for ordering that beef-encrusted cheesecake specifically for my needs...

Anyway, the fight scene was simply astounding. Good thinking for Teresa to lure the bandit into the waters to drown. And then, the bandit got pierced by a lance

Hmm, lance and piercing.

Y'know, my subconsious tells me that there's a hidden meaning behind those words and that I should be disgusted with myse- . . . Never mind.

This post has been edited by ureniashtram: Nov 19 2010, 08:59 PM


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Linara
post Nov 19 2010, 09:20 PM
Post #686


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From: Bruma, in a book.



I'm innocent! I didn't know what I was saying. Very long papers with MLA formatting do that to you.


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haute ecole rider
post Nov 19 2010, 10:03 PM
Post #687


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I'm not! Innocent, that is.

*Puts hand on curvaceous hip and - *ba-bump*

(in sultry voice) Innocence is overrated.

*Ba-bump*


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mALX
post Nov 19 2010, 10:13 PM
Post #688


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QUOTE(haute ecole rider @ Nov 19 2010, 04:03 PM) *

I'm not! Innocent, that is.

*Puts hand on curvaceous hip and - *ba-bump*

(in sultry voice) Innocence is overrated.

*Ba-bump*



And now we see how Haute Ecole Rider became...Naughty Haute !!!


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mALX
post Nov 19 2010, 10:21 PM
Post #689


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Next chapter...the unveiling and screenie of the "cavalryman?" WOO HOO! I think I may still have a copy of this "person" on my PM's at the BGSF.

Awesome action, I loved this the first time around too!

This post has been edited by mALX: Nov 19 2010, 10:22 PM


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Destri Melarg
post Nov 20 2010, 12:53 AM
Post #690


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QUOTE
Here's one

"When I get angry, Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset, and when Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset . . . people DIE!" laugh.gif
QUOTE
mALX: From here on out half of Teresa's dialogue will have to be bleeped, due to Tony Montoya playing her role.

Wrong Tony I believe. Mel Novak played a character named Tony Montoya in the Chuck Norris film, An Eye for an Eye. Al Pacino played Tony Montana in the movie Scarface.

It wasn’t until I was exhausted from running with Teresa that I finally remembered this chapter. The opening is completely different (or maybe that is just my imagination). Following Teresa’s thought process as she adopts and discards various battle tactics is just as harrowing as I remember. This time the foe that she faces seems more terrifying. I was thankful for the appearance of the legionary and his lance (Oops! I think I just joined Linara in the ‘what possessed me to say THAT?’ section of this forum!). blink.gif

QUOTE(haute ecole rider @ Nov 19 2010, 09:57 AM) *

Just one thing I would like to clarify: just how close was Teresa to the bandit when that lance hit him? I can see this being very dangerous for her, since the impact of the lance with the momentum of a galloping horse behind it would send him flying. If she's close enough, she would have been hit by his body, or knocked into the path of the horse. On first read, that is the impression I have.

I believe that the legionary rode between Teresa and the marauder:
QUOTE
Then the rider was galloping between the Teresa and the marauder, drawing the lance tip out behind him as he broke away.

When the lance struck home the marauder was forced away from Teresa, not toward her (at least, that is how I understood it).

QUOTE(mALX @ Nov 19 2010, 11:19 AM) *

QUOTE(Linara @ Nov 19 2010, 01:20 PM) *

QUOTE(D.Foxy @ Nov 19 2010, 10:13 AM) *

LINARA HAS A DOUBLE BARRELLED D....K????


blink.gif

:jawdrop:

Yes, as well as a black and white Khajiit wink.gif




SPEW!!! Hello Carrot Top !!!! Where's Destri? Now that's taking androgyny to a whole new level !!!

rollinglaugh.gif


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SubRosa
post Nov 20 2010, 01:04 AM
Post #691


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QUOTE(Destri Melarg @ Nov 19 2010, 06:53 PM) *


I believe that the legionary rode between Teresa and the marauder:
QUOTE
Then the rider was galloping between the Teresa and the marauder, drawing the lance tip out behind him as he broke away.

When the lance struck home the marauder was forced away from Teresa, not toward her (at least, that is how I understood it).


The original version was kind of vague. I went back and tweaked that part after Haute's post, to make the positions more clear. I am glad it came out how I wanted it this time.

This post has been edited by SubRosa: Nov 20 2010, 01:04 AM


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haute ecole rider
post Nov 20 2010, 01:36 AM
Post #692


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Just re-read the part I was questioning earlier. Much, much better, especially this:

QUOTE
Teresa moved as well, stepping closer to the marauder, but not so close that she would get in the path of the oncoming horse.


Yes, that is exactly what I was wondering on the first read-through. The rewrite does well to clarify Teresa's position relative not only to the marauder but also the horse.


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Acadian
post Nov 20 2010, 02:30 AM
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Heartpoundingly excellent! Great pace and build up to a crunchingly satisfying conclusion!

I congratulate Teresa for a couple things:
1. Her decision to run for the water. I believe that might have been able to save her had the Legion not arrived in time.
2. Her quick thinking to help the Legion rider while staying out of the way. The purpose and timing of her flare spell was excellent.

Teresa, you really need to get Morcant to start your conjuration training. I'm worried about you out there without the ability to summon some help. I know you may have to start with rats, but before you know it, you will be able to call forth a wolf to help. Perhaps with enough practice even a lion, or - dare I say it - a brown bear? wink.gif

goodjob.gif


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Linara
post Nov 20 2010, 03:07 AM
Post #694


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From: Bruma, in a book.



QUOTE
(Oops! I think I just joined Linara in the ‘what possessed me to say THAT?’ section of this forum

Thank goodness I'm not the only one!


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D.Foxy
post Nov 20 2010, 08:38 AM
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And now, having made my joke,
I do withdraw my juevenile stroke
For Rosa, far wiser than silly old me
Has by PM made me well and truly see -

What's fun for the Hippo may be death for the ant
AND may spoil the harmony here by tears or rant
And thus, by way of the magical feature 'edit'
I now try to regain some forum merit -

By replacing Sheogorath's ventings with rhyme
perhaps more suited to this forum's clime
So, Linara! Fear NOT to read - THIS time
The original has been replaced by something more sublime!!!


*but privately I'll still chuckle inside
whenever I find you've missed the meaning wide...*

All in fun, Foxy

This post has been edited by D.Foxy: Nov 21 2010, 02:29 AM
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D.Foxy
post Nov 20 2010, 08:43 AM
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The reason for the above edit, Lin, is Sage Rosa, who has taken your brief without any lawyer's fee (you might want to consider sending a pair of goggles for her laser cat, though) and made your case to me - like SO nono.gif - through PM.

ohmy.gif
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Here's the reply I sent to Rosa - I think it bears repeating...

A point well made, thou both 'man' and maid
And who but thee, who has thru troubles a -wade
would know what thoughts swirl through minds young
would know what might in jest have well stung?

And since I have vented Sheo's mad prompting
And like Bull through China Shop been stomping
Now shall I revert back to the Fox o' silver hair
And declare "Just Joking, Lin! There, there!!!"


cool.gif


Foxy

This post has been edited by D.Foxy: Nov 21 2010, 02:33 AM
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Linara
post Nov 20 2010, 09:57 PM
Post #697


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From: Bruma, in a book.



While there is something to be said for the edit button, it can make things very confusing. But...Thanks Foxy?

This post has been edited by Linara: Nov 21 2010, 09:42 PM


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SubRosa
post Nov 21 2010, 12:31 AM
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Don't pay any attention to him Linara. I for one appreciate you reading this topic and making thoughtful posts on it.

This post has been edited by SubRosa: Nov 21 2010, 03:08 AM


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Verlox
post Nov 21 2010, 02:49 AM
Post #699


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Ah, a heroic and manly rescue! I am most entertained!


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treydog
post Nov 21 2010, 02:55 AM
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QUOTE
Yet Teresa's arms did not tremble as she raised her bow, nor did she hasten as she smoothly pulled it to half tension, expelled half the air in her lungs, and took aim.


Outside the context of all we know of Teresa, this seems unremarkable. But when we remember how she started, this sentence speaks volumes about the changes she has experienced.

QUOTE
The seconds seemed to crawl by like hours as the scene unfolded in front of Teresa's eyes. She could see clods of loose dirt and blades of grass being kicked up behind the horse's hooves, while droplets of spittle flew from its mouth. The steel point of the legionary's spear flashed silver in the light of the sun, while the long, jagged sword of the outlaw glinted red. The marauder was moving now, stepping slightly to one side and raising his longsword. The rider's lance moved with him, its point ever facing the bandit's heart.


Every now and then, there is a passage that is just so perfect, you have to hold it up and admire its beauty.

The excellent tactical use of the Flare reminds me of J.B. Books in The Shootist talking about how he survived so many gun battles- "I found most men aren't willing, they bat an eye, or draw a breath before they shoot. I won't."

In this case, Teresa creates the perfect distraction- the hesitation that seals the marauder's fate.

Nit:

QUOTE
She realized that was never going to stop him in a fight.


I think a pronoun went missing in action here- “She realized that she was…”


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