“I know what it is anyway; you don’t have to be so nervous.”

My jaw hit the ground. I certainly wasn’t expecting her to know anything, but I wasn’t surprised. Mya wasn’t an idiot. I was constantly undermining her in my head about what she knew about the realities of life, but this had just proved that-

“You’ve left my birthday present at home, haven’t you?” She asked.

This is perfect! There is so much truth in the way you show Mya and Jessika interacting. I’m enjoying this story very much.

oh no! Jessika gets knocked off her high-horse! That little kid is not so little anymore. It's good I read this, it probably is foreshadowing what will happen eventually with me! Not that I tell lots of lies to my kid; but let's just say I don't always expand on the truth. Or I'll side-step it.

Anyways, MAN I liked the unseen village part! It's great you took the opportunity to stop by there, without getting involved in the entire quest itself. I know I've done this with several of my characters. Ya know...one character (or 2) did the actual quest where the town is saved from it's "curse", and the rest of my characters who've passed by that town simply ignore, or otherwise don't get as involved with their concerns.

And the bit where the Imperial rode by on his horse! I was thinking he would say something corny "Stay safe, citizen, these are dark times..." but he was one of the strong, silent types!

As always, looking forward for more. Will Jess & Mya go to the I.C.? Willl they go to Chorrol? Will they go somewhere else? hee hee hee....

Dammit!!...Missed these... ...

Fantastic stuff...So heartwarming and heartaching at the same time...Brilliantly done...There's great depth of feeling in your writing...I salute you!!...

One teenie thing, if I may?...*Ponders problems with waiting for permission...*...

Hmmm...Aaaamywho...

This sentence made my head hurt...



The bleating sheep was silent?...Or the village seemed silent from where they were?...Ummm...

I did absolutely love these two chapters...And am really looking forward to more...Much more...

Nice one!!...

*Applauds most heartily*...

This post has been edited by McBadgere: May 4 2012, 07:23 PM

The world may be beautiful, but it’s also violent, cruel and unforgiving.
Especially a world like Tamriel. I like that line. I’ve thought it many times myself.

Pranal was just telling me about his days as an adventurer
I was an adventurer like you…

“You’ve left my birthday present at home, haven’t you?”


Aleswell! They’ve traveled some distance already then.

I had a feeling that Mya knew what was happening to them.

Well it’s off to the Imperial City. I wonder if we will be seeing the inside of a very familiar prison cell?

A lovely spillage of the beans between Mya and Jessika. It is a relief that Jess no longer has to keep up the pretense anymore. Although I can sympathize with her desire to protect Mya's innocence by keeping the truth from her.

And a hilarious romp through the unseen residents of Aleswell!

Sorry for the he late reply! I've been caught up with many things recently.

Okay, so we come to realize that Mya was not the naive girl we all imagined her to be. She knew exactly everything! That was a little twist that made my eyes widened, and also a small laugh. Poor Jessika, the emotional toll was also too much for her. It's obvious with all the tears. I can imagine you trying to keep things a secret to not burden the other, but then the act itself is frowned upon later on. It was a relief to see that it all was rectified by the end of the chapter, with sister and sister both coming to terms rather quickly and understanding each other! After all, they only have to look after themselves right? No use in bickering!

Wow! Thanks again everyone for your kind words! it is great that I have so much support and I appreciate each and every reader that stumbles across my little tale.

I've been super busy this week and I really hope it didn't affect my writing. It wasn't rushed or anything as I've spent the best part of two weeks writing the whole chapter, It's just my mind has been so frazzled getting the words onto the page has been a challenge. none the less I hope you enjoy reading it







I stood outside the main gate to the Imperial City, still wondering whether or not accepting whether going to the Waterside District was the best option for Mya and I.

Mya was more than willing to go, claiming that she didn’t care where they stayed as long as she was with me and although I felt the same I was still in two minds as to whether or not it was really the best course of action.

I ceased my thoughts and looked over to the horse stables where Mya was admiring the equestrian beasts. I sighed at my thoughts and headed over the stables, plastering a smile on my face as I approached Mya and her new friend.

“Well who do we have here?” I asked Mya as she turned to me, the biggest grin on her face.

“This is Valerie. Restita let me name her.”

I looked over at the Breton woman who smiled at me. I assumed this was the woman Mya was speaking of.

“Right, are you ready to go?” I asked Mya.

“Aww why! It’s not like we actually have anywhere we need to be.”

I smiled at her comment. She was right, we didn’t, but the truth was horses had always made me nervous ever since I was nearly trampled by one in the Cheydinhal stables when I was little.

But despite my wariness I gave in. I knew that Mya didn’t have anything to look forward to or be excited about once we move on, so I decided to let her have some time with Valerie.

“Okay, ten more minutes, okay?” I said. I kissed Mya on the head as she giggled with glee. I smiled and walked over to the barn to take seat. Once I was sat down Restita approached and sat next to me.

“Hello there!” She said.

“Hi.” I replied.

“You’re sister seems to love that horse over there.” She smiled. I was thrilled that she didn’t assume she was my daughter.

“Yes, she loves all animals. It’s hard to tear her away from them most of the time.”

“Well you make sure to let her know she is welcome here anytime. She is a delightful child.”

I smiled at the compliment. “Thank you.”

We both turned to look at Mya who was trying her best to jump on the horses back. She was unsuccessful.

“Although…” Restita started as I turned to look at her. “I cannot promise you that Valerie will be there after today.”

“Oh?” I said with wonder in my tone. “Has somebody bought her?”

Restita laughed as if I made the most ridiculous assumption she had ever heard.

“Oh no, quite the opposite! The horses have been going missing recently.”

I really couldn't care less due to my distaste for the creatures, but I thought I'd show some form of compassion for Resitia's predicament.

“Oh that’s a shame. Where have they gone?”

She looked at me with disbelief.

“If I knew that they wouldn’t be missing would they?”

Awkwardness ensued after this comment, so I decided the best thing to do was return to Mya. I stood up, bid farewell to Restita and headed over to Mya. However while I was walking I was stopped by an orc who appeared as if from nowhere.

“Are you interested in buying one of the horses?”

“What? Oh, no, we are just simply admiring them. They are beautiful.” I told her. Her next comment seemed to be a though said out loud.

“That they are, and they’re tasty too…”

“Excuse me?” I asked, confused and a little bit shocked.

“Add a bit of onion and…” She suddenly looked at me, realising what she was saying. “Oh, what? Eat the horses? That’s disgusting.”

“Um… I don’t mean to speak out of place but… did you eat the horses?”

“NO! Of course not! I told you that is disgusting!”

I smiled sheepishly and slowly backed away towards Mya, waving at the orc as I did so.

Once I reached Mya I grabbed her hand and began to lead her off. In reality I was slightly unnerved by the orc’s subtle confession.

“Okay, come on honey, we have to go now.”

“Aww, okay…” Mya sulked. She patted the horse one last time and kissed it’s neck. “BYE!”

We walked out of the stables, Mya waving to Restita as we left.
We walked until we were out of sight before sitting beside a tree near the main entrance to the city. I pulled out two apples that I had salvaged on our walk to the city and handed one to Mya. As she tucked into it I spoke to her.

“Now… are you sure you want to go to the Waterfront district? I’m sure we continue to travel someone will take heed of our situation and offer us a place to stay?”

“Stop being so queenie.” She ordered me, using a word I had never heard before in my life.

“Queenie?”

“You’re so snooty about everything.”

“No I’m not; I just… don’t trust the poor.”

“See! Snooty!” She laughed.

She then leaned the front of her body over my legs and raised hers in the air.

“We’re poor now Jessika. Beggars can’t be choosers.”

Her statement shocked me. She was so grown up and opinionated. For a moment I felt like the little sister.

“I’m sure the people who live there aren’t that bad. They’re probably in the same boat as us.” Mya continued.

“I guess so…”

“A free house is a free house isn’t it?”

“Okay, okay, you’ve made you’re point!” I laughed. “I just worry for you.”

She looked at me, a baffled look on her face.

“Why?” She asked.

“Because…” I started, not wanting to be to direct in my reason. “We don’t know that we can trust those that are living there, and I don’t want to get involved in anything that might land us in trouble.”

“Like what? Getting arrested because we have no money?”

“No…” I said. I wanted to say more, but I didn’t. There was obviously more on my mind than what she said, but I didn’t want to scare her.

“Besides, I’m sure that we won’t be there forever. I trust you and I think you’ll get a good job and we will be back home before you know it.”

“You think so?” I smiled.

“I know so. Anyway, I’m going there whether you like it or not, so It’s up to you whether or not you want to come with me.”

I laughed. She was a tough cookie, my sister. She refused to take no for an answer. She reminded me of my mother at that point. She was always a strong lady, always willingn to look on the brightside and never back down. She always used to say 'If you don't stand for anything, you'll fall for nothing'. I just wish I could have heeded those inspiring words.

I looked at her a for a moment before standing up. Mya stood with me.

“Right, how about we explore the city for a little while before we go to the Waterfront?”

“Stop stalling Jessika!”

“I’m not stalling,” I lied. “I just want to explore the city.”

Mya had a look of disbelief in her eyes.

“Okaaaay.” She said.

“Okay?”

“Yeah.”

I grabbed her hand as we walked to the main gate of the Imperial city. The truth was I hoped that taking a walk through the city would give us some kind of plausible reason to not go to the Waterfront.

But knowing my luck, all I could do was hope.

This post has been edited by Andrea: May 29 2012, 06:10 PM

Mya may take care of Jessika just as much as Jessika takes care of Mya when all is said and done! I like how she saw her mother's strength in Mya too.

The Orc at the stables was a hilarious touch, I've always been afraid to leave my horses in that stables, lol. Glad to see someone bring up her dietary habits when it comes to the steed you are trusting to her care, lol.

Awesome Write !!!

‘For a moment I felt like the little sister.’
The build up to this conclusion was perfect. I had to smile when I read it. Mya is quite the grown up young girl. Despite the age difference, these two seem more like friends than older and younger sister. They are quite the complementary pair. Wonderfully done!

How exciting that Mya is a horse-crazy girl! I hope Jessika gets over her coolness toward the animals. Great fun reminding us of that Snack Grabbing orcish ostler!

Jessika clearly has concern about being among the poor. Mya is a good counter to this. The interaction between the two is marvelous.


Nits. Your normally solid editing seemed a bit off for this episode. Please let me know if you would rather not be picked on for typos etc. Some writers want these things pointed out, others do not.

‘I stood outside the main gate to the Imperial City, still wondering whether or not accepting whether going to the Waterside District was the best option for Mya and I.’
Perhaps just me, but does this seem confused and/or perhaps redundant? You might just want to delete the bold part.

‘Mya was more than willing to go, claiming that she didn’t care where they stayed as long as she was with me’
I think you want ‘we’.

“You’re sister seems to love that horse over there.”
‘Your’

‘Her next comment seemed to be a though said out loud.’
‘thought’

“I’m sure we continue to travel someone will take heed of our situation and offer us a place to stay?”
You need an ‘if’ in front of we.

“Okay, okay, you’ve made you’re point!”
‘your’

‘She was always a strong lady, always willingn to look on the brightside and never back down.’
‘willing’ (and you might want to split 'bright side' into two words)

‘I grabbed her hand as we walked to the main gate of the Imperial city.’
Capitalize ‘City’ here since it is part of the proper name – just like you did in the first sentence of the episode.

I've been reading this for a while now but haven't had time to comment, but now I do!

I LOVE this!

I love how real you portray the relationship between Jess and Mya. I often find my self feeling what Jessika feels, which doesnt happen often.

I also love your little subtle quirkyness when I came to Aleswell. You don't make it clear about what's really going on in the village, and I loved that!

I have to agree with everyone when I say that i love the strong little girl Mya has become; but will she be too strong for her own good!

Can't wait for more! I love them girls!!

*chuckles* I really think it's possible to do an entire chapter or two just on the Chestnut Handy Stables. It's such an predicament those horses find themselves in.



Uh oh....I can't even imagine why this would be?