That's because on my phone, I can't see who wrote what clearly, and when I got on the computer, I didn't bother to check my work when I responded saying mALX was mean. I was really confused on why you were like "What? She's not mean!" and I'm thinking "But Lydia! Dragon shouts!! Pack mule!!"

For clarification, mALX is the one suggesting giving Lydia a Creme Egg, and I (Colonel Mustard) am cataloging the numerous ways in which I abuse Lydia. Draw your conclusions as to who of us two is being nice from that.

Yeah, I know that now.

Sorry, mALX! You're not mean!!! Mustard is!!!! XD

Just to clarify, I wanted to give her the Cadbury egg because I thought she was PMS'ing by her "personality" and hoped the chocolate would...help her mood. (before I "shouted" her off a cliff like Mustard did).

In Oblivion I found at least 100 ways to kill the Adoring Fan. In Fallout 3 I found at least 300 ways to kill Moira (especially effective viewing through VATS). in Skyrim (thanks to the shouts) there are unlimeted ways to kill Lydia.


Lydia can't sneak:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oLGR_2tt3GM


The Lydia Parodies:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGpoTBUXlLs


Gotta love Lydia - watch through till end, there is a short after the credits:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QtPheENmdrw


*

This post has been edited by mALX: Mar 26 2013, 06:01 PM

Man, those videos crack me up.

They captured Lydia so well, lol.

Wow those are great. Thanks for sharing. It really brings the annoying bits of Skyrim to life.

Look at the one where she's eating the food, lol

Lmfao just saw it. That's how it goes.

Pause combat, sit down for a snack, kick ass.

I love how they picked out all Lydia's glitches and irritating actions. I saw a real gameplay vid once where an assassin character was trying to sneak along a dock with Lydia in tow - it had me in hysterics!

It's quite, quite true.

And now for more pure insanity with everyone's favourite unhinged pyromancer, Terrena Calmenin! I find myself worried by how easily I can get into her head...


Dear Diary

I made a friend today! His name is Kharjo and he's helping me around Skyrim after I got him an amulet that had been stolen. I had to kill some bandits in a tower over a river, but after that I found him the amulet and he was so grateful he decided to come with he across Skyrim, and it's great. Don't tell anyone, but I think he's kind of hot.

No, seriously, don't. I know you've been talking about me behind my back with my copy of Darkest Darkness. If you tell that bitch anything about Kharjo I'll go tell her what you and the Wolf Queen Volume II have been doing when she can't see. Yeah, I know. That stopped you, didn't it?

Aaanyway, we were near Riften, so we figured we'd head into town to see what was going on. There were some guards there who said I had to pay to get in but I was like 'Nuh-uh!' and then told them I'd burn them alive if they didn't let me in so they did. Girl power!

When I was inside, I told a smith named Balimund I'd help him get Fire Salts to make his forge hotter (more fire is good for everyone!) and I met a man named Brynjolf who said he wanted my help.

--------------

"You look like somebody who's never done an honest day's work in your life, eh lass?" the well-dressed Nord who passed Terrena in the street asked her.

"Whats that suppose to mean?" Terrena asked. "Have you been following me? You've been following me, haven't you!"

She grabbed him by the collar and drew him eye to eye, flames crackling in her free hand.

"I knew somebody had been following me," she hissed. "And I should've guessed it would be you of all people!"

"I...what? I haven't been following you!" the Nord protested. "I swear! Gods above!"

"You haven't?" Terrena asked. She released her grip on his shirt and he stumbled back. "That's okay then."

The Nord shook his head.

"Gods above, what's wrong with you?" he asked.

"According to a Priest of Mara I used to know, dissasociative personality disorder possibly caused by some kind of repressed trauma," Terrena said. "But then the voices in my head told me he was planning to betray me so I had to kill him, because you should always trust the voices in your head."

There was silence. The Nord exchanged a baffled look with Kharjo. The Khajiit just shrugged.

"Right, maybe we should start at the top," the Nord said. "I'm Brynjolf. I was hoping you could do me a favour."

"OK," Terrena said. "What do you need?"

"I need you to get me a ring, and plant it on another Dunmer by the name of Brand-Shei," Brynjolf said. "But without him knowing about it, you see."

"Oh, you mean like a surprise present? Surprise presents are nice, I'll help," Terrena nodded enthusiastically.

"It's...yes, it's a surprise present for him," Brynjolf said. "It's a silver ring being kept at Madesi's stall, so all you need to do is get it from there and then slip it into Brand-Shei's pocket while I distract everybody."

"Alright then! Yay for presents!"

-------------

I did such a good job of giving Brand-Shei his surprise present that Brynjolf said he could use my help in the future! I'm a good helper, yay for me!

omfg

Darkest Darkness is such a blabbermouth! XD

Wow, Mustard. Terrena is... terrifying. I want to laugh, but there's this chill on my neck.

Someone has been watching the Jodi Arias trial, lol.

I'm a little worried for Kharjo...

GAAAAAH! What happened?

Wait doesn't everybody do that?

???

/joke

I'm guessing it's the company he keeps. Also, who's Jodi Arias?

This post has been edited by Colonel Mustard: Mar 27 2013, 12:18 PM