Whos Got More Bling Than The Nerevarine?, [Spoiler Alert!!] Options

[Black Hand]

Basically, think of a mission in Morrowind that yielded the you the most loot and armor, weapons, etc. that you can think of, and write a quick rhyming verse about it. And try too include the line "Whos got more bling than the Nerevarine?" This can also be as "Sung to the tune of" or just a limerick, you get the idea. Just try to be creative.

Ill start


Whos got more bling than the Nerevarine?
No one else as far as Ive seen.

Up in Ald Redaynia, north as the Racer flies,
so much good loot, I could not beleive my eyes.
Greeted warmly by some arrows, Some arrows of
my own, dispatched those bony fellows.

Deep inside the ruins saw some dead Dunmer,
Stripped him of his spear, cuz he was Kwama Fodder.
Making my way past some fallen rocks,
The slaughterfish gave me a few knocks! (Ok cheesy, but I tried!)

Up in the tower was greeted by a huge Skeleton,
with eyes a-glowing red, and a bad disposition.
Right before he struck, this is what he said.

"Im the War-Wizard of Ald Redaynia!
With this Vampiric Ring, I'ma get rid of ya!
Dont take it personal, things are looking up!
If you kill me, you can take the Bittercup!"

Suffice to say, I left with his ring
And gave away An expensive trophy.
Now I walk the streets of Balmora,
with everyone looking at me,....

...Saying, whos's got more bling than the Nerevarine?

[Tellie]

Aha, that was just hilarious ( in a good way, dont be offended please), I have never seen such a good song/limerick/poem in quite a while, so good one try to make more, I'l be waiting.

[Neela]

These are fun... I remember doing things like these in college (quite awhile) ago.

Here goes...

'Twas the first of Frostfall, when it had been found
Not a thing was moving, not even nix-hound.

My body all rested and full of good cheer
I set out for treasure I hoped would be near.

I arrived by strider in the town of khuul,
the dunmer left saying, "you N'wah! you fool!"

I knew not this land I saw to say the least,
but with strictest conviction I headed east.

Not long had I journeyed when suddenly found,
attacked by three dunmer with magic abound.

I knew not what I done to provoke such ire,
but slain them and left them around their campfire.

The path that I walked started to fade from sight,
I often wonder why I travel at night.

Ahead I did see what the moon's light had showed,
a deep rocky valley where lava once flowed.

I stared up and down the very steep rock wall,
and thought to myself that I don't want to fall.

This was an obstacle I had to get by,
I casted a spell that allowed me to fly.

When up in the sky, aloft by my power,
I spied up ahead a dome or old tower.

I traversed the gully with moments to spare,
my mana now spent I would have to take care.

With visions of gold and a wanting for more,
I slowly creeped up on the old dwemer door.

With my sword in my hand, I entered the ruin,
and I said to myself, "What am i doin?"

The steam was hot, and the pipes they did rattle,
and I saw in the hall an elf named cattle.

I gripped the hilt of my blade, ready to fight,
cause everything seems to attack me on sight.

The elf then paused suddenly in her short walk,
it was then I decided. I should try talk.

She spoke to me little but enough to tell,
that I had found a blood-sucking undead hell.

Vampires are dangerous, thats how they are famed,
here even moreso because these all were named.

The battles that followed took all of my best,
as vampire after vampire I laid to rest.

The thrill of the fights! I did cackled with glee,
even though often times, I thought I should flee.

I lunge with my sword; I dodge, and I parry,
and take from their corpses all I can carry.

The deeper I delved, the more loot I did find,
the weight of it all was now troubling my mind.

In the final room, a challenge yet to pass;
a woman vampire dressed in armor of glass.

The fight was viscous, and the blood had run thick,
and during it all, I somehow was made sick.

Three days had passed when I found something to dread,
awoke that next eve as a newly undead.

Often life does not go according to plan,
I found I had slaughtered, my own Quarra clan.

Remember this now and take fate by the reins,
I really enjoy the new blood in my veins!

[Kindred Spirit]

A poem about who has more bling than nerevar? Impossible! Nobody does!

Ok, this'll be a poem I guess. Or a rap. Depends on how you read it in your head. I'm going for more of a rap style because it fits the theme better. But I can't rap for love or money, so expect this to suck royally. Some of the lines are weak, but hey, I suck. Only kinda poetry I can write well causes suicide and cancer.




Once, long ago, in a town called Seyda Neen,
There was a new boy in town called the Nerevarine.
Said Fargoth, "Boy, you ain't got no bling!
You lose to me and my fancy ring!"

Nerevar, he just punched Fargoth out
He took that ring, Fargoth started to pout.
Whose got more bling than the Nerevarine?
Not Fargoth in Seyda Neen!

Walked down to town called Balmora
On the way, got lost in all of the flora.
Got there, talked to Caius Cosades,
He's the shirtless man with funky shades!

It's a contest of bling
Nerevar pulls out his ring
Does some missions, makes magic sparkles dance,
Caius gives up the shades and some magic pants!

So who's got more bling than the Nerevarine?
Nobody in Seyda Neen!
Nobody out Balmora way
Everybody else can just go away

Walks down to Vivec to speak with the lord
Vivec says, "You're late. I got really bored
I bet all my bling bling
can beat yer fancy ring!"

Pulls out a magic bracelet called Wraithguard
Shoots some magic spells, sparks fill the yard
Nerevar steps up, takes a deep breath
tells Lord Vivec that it ain't over yet!

Vivec say, "Yer trippin'! You ain't got no bling!
All you got is some shades and a lameass ring!"
Nerevar laughs, "You think that's all?
Well, the bigger they are, the harder they fall!"

He puts on the shades and the sparkly ring
but wait, he's not out of bling bling!
Piles on more and more and more
Vivec says "Who you working for?"

Nerevar says, "Get outta me grill,
it's none of your business, dude just chill.
It's the great houses that I'm working for!
I got the belt ring and robe of the Hor-ta-tor!"

"But that's not all!
I got the ashlanders at me beck and call!
Each and every one gave me fancy bling!
None of them lame old crappy rings!"

"Teeth of Urshilaku, man, dat's tight,
poke people with 'em to get outta a fight
Thong of the Zainab fo' at da beach
The rags is what's important, not da speech"

"Madstone of Ahemusa drives me wild
Gets me in touch with my inner child
Siezing of Erisbenisum, man dat's coo'
Like Mr. T. says, I pity da foo'"

Nerevar won and he took the bling
left Vivec on his own, sighing
"Who's got more bling than that damned elf?
Nobody on all of Vvardenfell!"

But Vivec was wrong, that's fo' sure
He forgot evil old Dagoth Ur!
Who lives on Red Mountain, all his own
Stuck there for years, all alone

Nerevar says, "foo, you trippin'?
Think you can beat me, you must be flippin'!
You saw the bling I used to beat up Vivec
You saw his defeat, you gonna relive it!"

Ur just smiles, and shows off his bling,
the funky sun hat and his nipple rings
the giant stompy robot a thousand feet tall
that one alone filled up the hall

Then he shows off the rest of his bling, he's da bomb,
He won the heart of a god named Lorkhan!
But Nerevar just sucked it up and grinned
'cause dat's when he knew that would win!

Ur said, "Watchoo grinnin for?
you just lost the war"
Nerevar says, "Not by a mile
da bling I used to beat Vivec is just the tip of da style!"

"I got the giant hammer sunder
sounds like thunder
crystal blade keening
look, you're bleeding"

"I musta forgot to mention forgot to mention
I'm in cahoots with a god beyond your comprehension!
Azura gave me this, it's the best bling by far
Say hello to One-Clan-Beneath-Moon-and-Star!"

Dagoth Ur fell down, gasping in shock
Whoever gave Nerevar all of that stuff must rock!
So who's got more bling than the Nerevarine?
Nobody anyone's ever seen!

[Intestinal Chaos]

A poem about who has more bling than nerevar? Impossible! Nobody does!
<snip>

WOW!, I have to say, that was awsome. Great work Kindred, very hilarious.

[Tellie]

GOOD GOOD GOOD, i love all of it, please continue, I've never laughed so good in all my life, all of this rocks.

[Neck' Thall]

Please excuse me while i laugh my self into next week...(And in a good way)

I'm back and it was great,(BTW Wear socks tomorrow.) These poems are awsome. I really liked the rap.