Nowhere, Now here, Shadow of the Night Options

[Shadowgale]

This is a story of a girl named Shadow Night.

~~~~~

PART 1,
In which I write an annoying letter

The Effectiveness of Imperial Guards
When you think of Imperial Guards, what image pops into your head? Safety? Reassurance? Peace? No. The Imperial City has problems nowhere else has. Moreover, out of the 326 citizens interviewed, 325 of them have been pickpocketed, robbed, or assaulted (The one person who wasn't pickpocketed, robbed, or assaulted was an Imperial Legion Guard). Well, sure, in theory, the guards are close enough to everywhere, close enough to hear "Pickpocket, pickpocket!"

In reality, it takes several minutes to arrive, with spilled coffee on their armor, and by that time, the thief has already run away. Then the Imperial Guard proceeds to write several short, undetailed reports which go to lots of people who ignore them. Thus is the life of an Imperial guard.

Of course, the Watch Captains are also to blame. Why, only yesterday, I brought a case of a corrupt Imperial Watch Captain to Heiromymus Lex, who ignored it. When I talked to him later, he told me : 'Never blink, never wink, never compromise the law.

Hypocrites, the lot of them.

It was noon, and everyone was standing in front of the Black Horse Courier, besides, of course, me. I looked down at my published essay once again, and giggled. Ooh, they were going to kill me. Or, at least, try. Since I was amazingly fast, good at disguises, and never took the road, I hadn't been caught in my life. Of course, that was partially due to the fact that I hadn't used the same name twice. Actually, I'd used so many, that I wasn't sure if my real name was. Whatever it was, today I was going by Shadow. In fact, I even looked like a shadow; black hair, covered by a black hood, Blacksmiths pants, dark shirt, Leather boots and lots of black eye shadow and blush to cover my fair skin. So, of course, no one would recognise me.

While I was pondering my appearance, a rough voice shouted, "Get her!" I turned around in time to see three Guards running towards me. Time to demonstrate my lack of stick-around, I thought. So, of course, I ran. Ran like the non-existant wind. Or perhaps even faster. I ducked behind some armored arms, and through a door marked City Isle. Perfect

[Petra Arkanian]

Bravo! I've always wanted to diss the guards! They don't do anything, as you pointed out so nicely! Oh, geez, I'm gonna laugh myself to death.

[Shadowgale]

Thanks! I got the insparation by that one quest about Audins Aravious. Seriously... Hey, BTW, how did you get so many views on your story? Your only 13 days old on this thing! A hot topic and everything... *looks up in awe*

[Thomas Kaira]

Interesting, I like what I see so far, I do hope to see this continue!


Heartily looking forward to more!

This post has been edited by Thomas Kaira: Dec 23 2010, 01:38 AM

[mALX]

Perks the interest immediately with that read from the Courier - Great Write !!! This is an Awesome example of a story introduction, intriguing and with just enough info to keep the reader wanting to know more!!

[Acadian]

A warm welcome to chorrol, and into the Arena of posting your story!

So far, this is an engaging tease. We get enough of a feel for your character to pick up on her philosophy. We can begin to identify with her, yet you have deliciously kept many secrets. We also start with a conflict, as Shadow is pursued by the Legion.

Time to demonstrate my lack of stick-around, I thought.

How very clever this is!

[Shadowgale]

PART 2
In which I meet up with an old friend

I was sprinting down the long and winding bridge, surprised at my luck. I grinned to myself as a snatch of conversation flew past my ears.

"You see the essay that little girl wrote?"

"Yeah. I felt slapped." This was too tempting, so I turned around and entered the guard house.

"It would've been wasted if you hadn't," I said in my trilling soprano. The guards looked at me in surprise, or, rather, looked at where I had just been. For now I was running along the bridge once again. While I ran, I held my hand up to align with the four suns. Three forty-five, I decided after a moments thought. I pulled a compass out of my pocket. Let's see, I told myself. I need to be at Roxley inn at four, and the Inn is due north, and I am facing west, which means... I jumped off the side of the bridge, down thirty feet, hit the solid rock, and continued running without breaking stride. Clumsy I am not.

I ran north for a few minutes, then took all of my items and stowed them in a water-proof bag. Swimming! I thought. The water was warm, perfect for that sort of thing, and there was practically no current at all. I was tempted to just float around for a while, but I had something to do.

Twenty minutes later, I was in sight of the Roxley inn, and in sight of my best friend. I grinned at her.

"Hey, Haunt! You're early!" And so she was.

"Tex!" I quickly put a finger to my lips, an hurried forward.

"I'm Shadow today. Shush."

[Acadian]

Just a lightly acrobatic dance and a song across the bridge followed by a swim. Whew, this girl really doesn't stick around!

And meeting a friend!

[mALX]

Twenty minutes to get from Weye to Roxley Inn ... I detect a Skooma user...

Jumping down 30 foot onto solid rock and keeping on running without breaking stride? With the high pitched voice I am picturing a combination of Gumby and Michael Jackson. If she used magic to keep from shattering her legs, you may want to detail how she did it.

I did like the way she raised her hand to determine the time of day (down to the minute).

Dialogue and tags continue to be great !!!

[Shadowgale]

HAHAHAHA! SKOOMA DEALER. SNORT.

She's a master of Acrobatics, and she runs like hecka fast.

[Shadowgale]

Okay, I know, the last time I posted a story was last year. Sigh. Sorry!

PART 3
In which I get arrested.

"So, Shadow, how ya been?" asked Haunt. I grinned.

"Oh, the usual. You know, a little agrivating, a touch of fighting, and a good dose of sarcasm..."

"Ha ha. You know what I mean. Been in jail lately?"

"I don't go to jail," I protested. "I do things that could possibly maybe probably get me put in jail, but -"

"You do things that could get you in jail?" asked a low voice coming from behind me. I turned around and saw... An imperial legion guard. I mentally slapped my forehead. Why didn't I notice the horse sitting in front of the inn?

"Its off to jail with you," sneered the guard.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was sitting on a cot, contemplating my stupidity.

"Your in for life, missy!" said a jailer passing my cell. I groaned.

TWO DAYS LATER, DURING WHICH I SAT ON THE COT, THE GROUND, AND THE STOOL

Echoing voices reached my ears. I sat, perplexed, on the table, a new find.

"What we need now is to get you to safety," said a pompus female voice. A moment later, The speaker was in my view: A short woman, accompanied by two other people wearing the same armor and holding katanas, accompanied by an old man in regal purple robes, wearing a large red amulet around his neck.

It was the Emperor

[Acadian]

Your dialogue is nice and natural.

Uh oh. In jail!

Perhaps she will get out.

[Zalphon]

It's off to jail with you!

I love that!

[mALX]

I love this line, (spewed my coffee everywhere, lol) :

TWO DAYS LATER, DURING WHICH I SAT ON THE COT, THE GROUND, AND THE STOOL

[xavier]

Uh oh. In jail!

Perhaps she will get out.

Maybe that big amulet will disappear off the Emperors body! Ahem... I mean, maybe the Emperor will die! Ahem... don't tell baurus.

[TheOtherRick]

"Your in for life, missy!" said a jailer passing my cell. I groaned.

She musta been a bad, bad girl.

Hectic, cute, and interesting lead in to meeting the Emperor in the cell. I'm looking forward to seeing where this goes.