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Olen
post Oct 11 2009, 09:26 PM
Post #1


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Joined: 1-November 07
From: most places



Some of you probably remember my last piece, Yesterday's Shadow and that it had a rather unsatisfying ending. I spent the summer rectifying this and now have a sizeable sequel/ completion to it which is itself now finished. It would probably be better to read Yesterday's Shadow before this as it would make more sense, however you should get by without it. If anyone wants I'll put a synopsis here, though Yesterday's Shadow isn't very long so you could just read it here (enough plugs yet?) tongue.gif

Anyway without further ado:



Burning Today


Prologue

Dervas wore boots while he worked. Shoes didn't last long in the decaying mixture of blood, vomit, drink and drugs which floored The Black Guar. The dark man had finally passed out and for the first time Dervas dared look at him. A worn man with a broken soul. Who are you? The Black Guar didn't get passing trade – the mixture of pushers, heavies and racketeers who made up most of his patronage didn't appreciate strangers. In the first hour the man, who now lay face down on the table, had knocked two out cold and broken another's arm. They left him alone after that and he them. Dervas wiped the remains of a line of sugar off the bar and nodded to the bouncer who went to move the man to his room.

Someone knocked at the door. Dervas ignored it. They knocked again, for longer this time. He cursed and went to tell whoever it was where to go. It was late an he didn't need any more trade. He pushed open the door, a curse dancing on his tongue. A sack crashed to the ground, gold clinked within. A Breton in black clothes stood in the doorway.

“What's his tab?” There was no need to ask whose.

“Sixty.”

The Breton showed no surprise, and counted out the gold. “Listen,” his tone offered pain if Dervas didn't, “You keep giving that guy drinks, drugs, whores, whatever he asks for okay? For him happy hour doesn't end, tabs never have to be paid. Push as much as you can into him. Don't worry - I'll be round a couple of nights a week to pay you. That sack,” he kicked disdainfully at the one he'd just dropped, “Contains a thousand drakes, payment enough I'd say. If he asks don't tell him, just give him more drink. Understand?”

Dervas nodded, his mouth was dry.

The man disappeared into the night.

Dervas walked back into the bar. He looked towards the dark man's room. Who are you? he thought again, And what have I gotten into?


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Look behind you and see an ever decreasing number of ghosts. Currently about 15.
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Olen
post Nov 11 2009, 04:54 PM
Post #2


Mouth
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Joined: 1-November 07
From: most places



5. Last Visit

Firemoth was dead by night. I slipped through darkened corridors. The keep slept. I knew the Mages Guild man lived somewhere above the Cult shrine, but I didn't want to go up that way. In all honesty I had no idea of what the mage might be capable of. I wanted every advantage, he might watch the corridor, I wouldn't use the one he'd expect.

Eventually I found a stairwell near the eastern corner of the fort. After the first story the thick stone walls gave way to draughty warped planks. They didn't look like they'd stop a determined woodpecker, let alone a Telvanni warhost. It made me wander what the guards had done to be stationed there. I passed another three floors, their darkened corridors weaved crazily off into the gloom. The air was rank with disuse and decay. Then I was at the top of the tower, a few crates lay broken around a ladder. Cheap arrows and empty bottles poked out from them. I climbed the ladder and opened the hatch at the top. There was a dull glow. I pushed my head out and realised why; in the lee of the thin wooden crenellations a brasier smouldered. Next to it slumped the dark form of a guard, a bottle hung from his limp fingers.

I froze. Dead? Then I saw his chest rise and fall. Only sleeping. I shook my head, what sort of place were they running? As stealthily as I could I hauled myself from the hatch and shut it. Judging by the amount gone from the bottle I could have just walked past him, but I crept north anyway. The cult lay on the ground floor at the corner of the north and east walls. The mage lived two floors above it. I hurried through the darkness until I reached another trapdoor back into the keep, I reckoned I was roughly above the cult shrine.

Inside was dark, the same musty smell permeated this bit of the keep as every other part. I started down the stairway, at the next floor I paused but decided I'd go down the same level as the mage. After descending I turned away down the darkened corridor, by the rust on their handles and the smell of damp most of the rooms were empty. I stalked twenty paces down it before I noticed the light which crawled though the cracks around a the third door from where I stood. My heart seized. The mage. I was already hiding in one of the door frames at the side.

Stop being so jumpy, I told myself. I was being paranoid. Even wizards couldn't watch so well that it was necessary to go halfway round the keep to approach them. I pushed myself upright against the cracked door where I'd hidden. It swung open. I looked inside. Nothing but cobwebs. But among the stoor an idea lurked. I liked it.

Moments later I was across the room. It was adjacent to the mage's. The window was stiff but I forced it and looked out. Sure enough light spilled from another only a few yards further along. I looked down. It was a long way, but there was an external beam in line with the floor level. I could probably climb along it. I looked again at the dizzying drop. A fall like that would kill me. But so would a mage, and I didn't intend to fall. I climbed onto the windowsill. My foot reached for the beam, I stretched for it but found only air. I eased myself a bit further. Again I flailed at air. A bit further. My toes met something solid but it was as slippery as hell.

To get my foot on it I'd have to be right out the window, past the point of safety. I took a breath and stepped. And slipped. I grabbed the sill and tore a nail from my finger. It groaned warningly but held. I took a couple of breaths. Still clutching the mouldy wood I swung my other leg over into the night. The beam was slippery but once I had both feet on it I felt more secure. But not so safe I wanted to let go of the sill. I had to though, so I gripped the side of the window instead, as much for comfort as anything. I didn't look down. Strangely it took an effort not to. I eased my way along the beam, one hand still locked on the side of the window like a child's hand on a toy. My heart pounded as I reached towards the side of the mages window. If I could reach both I wouldn't have to let go.

I couldn't.

I was going to have to let go for a couple of steps. I tried not to think about it as I willed my hand open. With a deep breath I shuffled reaching for the side of the next window. My probing fingers had just found it when a gust of wind swayed me. It wasn't much, just enough to distract me. I felt my left foot slip. A dreadful certainty fell, crashing down like treacle in my mind. Engulfing me with black fear. I lunged for the next window. My foot went. I scrabbled at it and got my foot back up. The side of the window frame crumbled rottenly away in my hand. But I was already moving. Before I'd realised I wasn't dead I stood outside my goal. Even better it wasn't locked.

It opened easily. I climbed in through some light curtains and crouched surveying the room.

"Quite an entrance," I froze, the voice chuckled, "Good effort, but never underestimate the paranoia of a Mages Guild member in a Telvanni town." His voice was like oiled silk. He was sitting at a desk facing me. I stood, "Don't reach for your weapons." He punctuated the remark with a little flicker of lightning from his fingers.

B'vek. I'd walked right into him. He wore a black robe. He was a breton. And the wan lamplight glinted on a white streak in his hair. This was my mark.

"Well, are you going to say anything? Or do you make a habit of climbing in though third floor windows?"

"I want answers," I said with more authority than I felt. I hate mages, you go to bash their heads in and don't know how dangerous they are until one, or other, of you is dead.

"As," he answered with infuriating calm, "Do I. Allow me to introduce myself, I am Ernard. Does the name Renera mean anything to you? I see that it does," I cursed how easily he read me, "Then am I to assume you were involved in something to do with the Guild up this way?"

"Yes," I said.

"I would dearly like to know what," this time it was his turn to give too much away. He was keen. And confident, too confident of his own intelligence.

"I'm not sure," I said, laying on just enough stupidity to make an impression, "It was a ruin of some sort, not that I'd know velothi from dwemer. There was a lot of magic there, especially round the fountains..."

"Yes," he eyes gleamed. Idiot.

"Well not really fountains, more... I don't know. It was like blue light in them, but liquid."

He was almost salivating, "Where was this. Could you find it?"

"Maybe," I said, trying to sound slow while my mind raced. I rubbed the lump of the windowframe which had come away in my hand, "I found a strange stone there. It seemed to work one of the fountains."

Hook.

"Do you have it," he was like a Khajit who'd been told the sugar fairy was coming.

"Ummm, I think so." I almost made a show of reaching for my belt. Then I paused, "You don't mind?"

"No! No! Show me."

Still holding the rotten wood in my palm I pretended to pull something from a pocket. Then I held my hand out in a fist. His eyes followed it. I stepped round the desk so there was nothing between us. He was too excited to notice. I let my fist tremble a little as he reached out. Then I opened my hand and dropped it.

Line.

The idiot let out a squeak and bent to catch it. His face met my kneecap coming the other way, I landed my hands on the back of his head just in time to give it a last push. I didn't give him a second before kneeing him again and then pulling a handful his hair forward and down to face plant him into the floor.

And sinker. He'd thought I was an idiot, and true he was more intelligent, but it was all brain and no sense.

I dropped on top of him though in honesty I needn't have. He was out of it, I think 'd broken his jaw on the first strike. I elbowed him on the back of the head for good measure before casting about the room. I didn't know much about mages, could he cast a spell with me on top of him, how long would it be before he had come round enough to try? I hate spellcasters. I had a nagging feeling someone had once told me it was almost impossible to cast a spell if you'd lost a lot of blood. It couldn't hurt to try. I reached for my knife.


--------------------
Look behind you and see an ever decreasing number of ghosts. Currently about 15.
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Posts in this topic
Olen   Burning Today   Oct 11 2009, 09:26 PM
treydog   Woo-hoo! This starts at a run and doesn't...   Oct 11 2009, 10:19 PM
Olen   Next bit and longer this time. It won't make ...   Oct 18 2009, 04:39 PM
treydog   Saying that I "enjoyed" reading the late...   Oct 20 2009, 05:26 PM
Olen   I admit I did lay it on a bit heavy in the last pa...   Oct 24 2009, 01:35 PM
treydog   Your descriptive power again places the reader rig...   Oct 25 2009, 03:10 PM
Olen   3. Finding the Scent The Watcher's Club scre...   Oct 30 2009, 10:33 AM
canis216   Well done. Real taut storytelling as ever.   Nov 1 2009, 10:34 PM
treydog   Woo-Hoo! Another excellent scene. Please con...   Nov 2 2009, 10:39 PM
Olen   Thanks for the comments. Without further ado: 4....   Nov 6 2009, 01:18 PM
RavenMind   I've just finished reading through this, and y...   Nov 11 2009, 02:38 AM
minque   Really interesting, just finished reading this one...   Nov 16 2009, 12:01 AM
Olen   Thanks for the comments. This part was hard to ed...   Nov 17 2009, 10:17 PM
minque   Story.Good.More It's an old nord proverb...   Nov 18 2009, 10:47 PM
Olen   7. Fresh Morning In the bottom of a dry gulch I ...   Nov 22 2009, 02:00 PM
Olen   8. Circles I found the track the farmer had desc...   Nov 27 2009, 05:38 PM
Olen   Appologies for the delay, RL has conspired to make...   Dec 8 2009, 11:50 AM
Olen   Next bit, as ever replies and criticisms are appri...   Dec 14 2009, 04:08 PM
Olen   11. Choice I sat bolt upright. Instantly awake....   Dec 19 2009, 02:44 PM
Syndelius Daerleth   LOVE the prologe very good! i havent read the ...   Dec 20 2009, 02:15 AM
canis216   Again, fabulous storytelling. You really get insid...   Dec 20 2009, 03:35 AM
Olen   Yes... My utter reliance on spellchecking shows it...   Jan 5 2010, 04:40 PM
Captain Hammer   Finally managed to get caught up on this one, Olen...   Jan 6 2010, 05:44 PM
minque   Uhh....jeez I like this one! A bit brutal but ...   Jan 8 2010, 07:14 PM
Olen   Cheers for the comments, it's appriciated. Ye...   Jan 12 2010, 01:07 PM
Olen   This was meant to be part of the previous part so ...   Jan 14 2010, 12:54 PM
Olen   15. Running In the end I just headed west for Al...   Jan 20 2010, 12:22 PM
Olen   16. The Fire of the Moment On my way to the taver...   Jan 25 2010, 03:53 PM
canis216   Ah, excellent work once again. I look forward to s...   Jan 26 2010, 04:10 AM
Olen   17. False Light Pandemonium ruled. People ran, ...   Jan 30 2010, 08:09 PM
canis216   Wow! Intense!   Jan 30 2010, 09:32 PM
Olen   Cheers for the comments, there's still pleanty...   Feb 4 2010, 03:20 PM
Olen   The story changes direction somewhat now so if you...   Feb 9 2010, 07:43 PM
Olen   20. News in the South Outside the high sun beat ...   Feb 15 2010, 04:56 PM
Olen   21. Glittering Opportunity I rolled off the bed....   Feb 22 2010, 03:41 PM
Olen   22. Reasons and Excuses It was the small hours o...   Feb 28 2010, 11:55 AM
canis216   I really enjoy the grit and intensity of this stor...   Mar 3 2010, 01:35 AM
Olen   Thanks for the comment, this piece wasn't the ...   Mar 7 2010, 10:47 PM
Olen   Sorry for the late reply, the last few days have b...   Mar 15 2010, 10:46 PM
Winter Wolf   Awesome write. How typical that even after all pos...   Mar 16 2010, 06:37 AM
SubRosa   I started reading from the first post, and still h...   Mar 16 2010, 03:37 PM
Acadian   WooHoo! What's not to like? First person...   Mar 16 2010, 09:15 PM
mALX   I have to catch up still, but I got such a kick ou...   Mar 16 2010, 09:53 PM
Destri Melarg   As the others have said, I just started reading th...   Mar 18 2010, 04:55 AM
Olen   Woo lots of comments. Thanks for the kind words, ...   Mar 19 2010, 03:07 PM
Remko   I got to chapter 10 and I love it! The charact...   Mar 19 2010, 05:38 PM
haute ecole rider   Well. I'm all caught up now on this thread (ha...   Mar 19 2010, 07:46 PM
mALX   As for the pubs, I could swear you had been in som...   Mar 20 2010, 06:55 AM
SubRosa   I am still working my way through. I love the real...   Mar 21 2010, 10:55 AM
Olen   Hmm, missed that, but it's sorted now. Along ...   Mar 21 2010, 02:21 PM
Destri Melarg   Just passed chapter 11 now. Firen is an incredibl...   Mar 22 2010, 12:28 AM
SubRosa   I am up to Chapter 21 now. I am not sure if it is ...   Mar 22 2010, 08:23 PM
Olen   I've never read Heart of Darkness so that wasn...   Mar 24 2010, 01:34 AM
haute ecole rider   This is a hard chapter to write, I can see that . ...   Mar 24 2010, 04:35 AM
mALX   What Hauty said, and I'd like to add that your...   Mar 24 2010, 03:33 PM
Destri Melarg   Okay I’m all caught up. Impressions: First, th...   Mar 25 2010, 06:08 AM
Remko   I just finished the last chapter and all I can say...   Mar 25 2010, 04:25 PM
SubRosa   I am finally caught up. Whew! You certainly kn...   Mar 26 2010, 01:33 AM
Remko   True, we still don't really know what he is. I...   Mar 26 2010, 12:06 PM
Olen   Wow so many replies... No update today but I thoug...   Mar 26 2010, 05:06 PM
Winter Wolf   Remko (and SubRosa) - It is mentioned a few times...   Mar 30 2010, 05:33 PM
Destri Melarg   Remko (and SubRosa) - It is mentioned a few times...   Mar 26 2010, 05:47 PM
Olen   27. Bitter Dreams The slaughter finished I plodd...   Mar 29 2010, 02:20 PM
mALX   Really great detail, even right down to following ...   Mar 29 2010, 04:40 PM
haute ecole rider   Excellent overview of what comes after the sack, w...   Mar 29 2010, 04:45 PM
SubRosa   Grey-Tail the other Argonians certainly have passi...   Mar 29 2010, 04:49 PM
Remko   I thought it was a very clever - and logical - cha...   Mar 29 2010, 06:22 PM
Destri Melarg   Firen’s concern over the fate of the slaves and hi...   Mar 31 2010, 01:10 AM
Remko   Okun is a name from "Independance Day", ...   Mar 31 2010, 05:15 PM
Olen   Thanks for all the comments again, they're gre...   Apr 2 2010, 03:47 PM
Remko   aaarrgghhh.... MORE!   Apr 2 2010, 04:17 PM
Destri Melarg   Oh man, this is really starting to get good! ...   Apr 2 2010, 09:34 PM
mALX   Oh man, this is really starting to get good! ...   Apr 2 2010, 11:17 PM
SubRosa   Now we see the fallout of the raid, which Firen ha...   Apr 2 2010, 11:12 PM
haute ecole rider   Agreed that the swim at the end of the chapter was...   Apr 3 2010, 12:07 AM
canis216   Never realized Argonians can be such prudes! ...   Apr 3 2010, 05:01 AM
Winter Wolf   A masterful chapter. Lovely command of dialogue th...   Apr 3 2010, 07:07 AM
Olen   Thanks for the comments, oddly the last chapter wa...   Apr 6 2010, 04:28 PM
mALX   Huge amount of detail in this chapter, written nat...   Apr 6 2010, 07:22 PM
Destri Melarg   I agree, very powerful. I am really growing to ad...   Apr 6 2010, 08:58 PM
SubRosa   This one line stays with me the most, due to it po...   Apr 6 2010, 11:02 PM
Remko   Loved it, the sneaking part was exceptionally well...   Apr 7 2010, 02:40 PM
haute ecole rider   I"m still reading and enjoying this. This la...   Apr 7 2010, 06:22 PM
Olen   Thanks for the comments all, I appriciate them. I...   Apr 11 2010, 06:18 PM
SubRosa   Excellent description of the ford. You vividly cap...   Apr 11 2010, 07:21 PM
haute ecole rider   Awesome! The description of the river, the rem...   Apr 11 2010, 07:26 PM
mALX   The last paragraph is HUGE! Very powerful writ...   Apr 11 2010, 08:12 PM
Olen   Well seeing as the last piece was short as I wante...   Apr 13 2010, 05:49 PM
Destri Melarg   Chapter 30: I stand in full agreement with the oth...   Apr 13 2010, 11:12 PM
SubRosa   An exciting entry, made so by the palpable tension...   Apr 15 2010, 05:47 PM
Remko   Loved chapters 30 and 31 forreasons mentioned abov...   Apr 16 2010, 04:20 PM
mALX   Yes, more more!!! You always seem to...   Apr 16 2010, 07:16 PM
Olen   Thanks for the comments, I've taken a lot more...   Apr 17 2010, 08:34 PM
SubRosa   That was a very exciting battle! You showed th...   Apr 18 2010, 08:35 AM
mALX   mALX's comment does raise a question for me -...   Apr 18 2010, 09:18 AM
Destri Melarg   The battle sequence was excellent. I was hoping t...   Apr 19 2010, 01:16 AM
canis216   Powerful. I'm not sure what else I can say.   Apr 20 2010, 04:01 AM
haute ecole rider   Sorry for not posting sooner. I have read this tw...   Apr 20 2010, 02:45 PM
Olen   Thanks for the comments, so many have inspired me ...   Apr 22 2010, 04:52 PM
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