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Olen
post Oct 11 2009, 09:26 PM
Post #1


Mouth
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Joined: 1-November 07
From: most places



Some of you probably remember my last piece, Yesterday's Shadow and that it had a rather unsatisfying ending. I spent the summer rectifying this and now have a sizeable sequel/ completion to it which is itself now finished. It would probably be better to read Yesterday's Shadow before this as it would make more sense, however you should get by without it. If anyone wants I'll put a synopsis here, though Yesterday's Shadow isn't very long so you could just read it here (enough plugs yet?) tongue.gif

Anyway without further ado:



Burning Today


Prologue

Dervas wore boots while he worked. Shoes didn't last long in the decaying mixture of blood, vomit, drink and drugs which floored The Black Guar. The dark man had finally passed out and for the first time Dervas dared look at him. A worn man with a broken soul. Who are you? The Black Guar didn't get passing trade – the mixture of pushers, heavies and racketeers who made up most of his patronage didn't appreciate strangers. In the first hour the man, who now lay face down on the table, had knocked two out cold and broken another's arm. They left him alone after that and he them. Dervas wiped the remains of a line of sugar off the bar and nodded to the bouncer who went to move the man to his room.

Someone knocked at the door. Dervas ignored it. They knocked again, for longer this time. He cursed and went to tell whoever it was where to go. It was late an he didn't need any more trade. He pushed open the door, a curse dancing on his tongue. A sack crashed to the ground, gold clinked within. A Breton in black clothes stood in the doorway.

“What's his tab?” There was no need to ask whose.

“Sixty.”

The Breton showed no surprise, and counted out the gold. “Listen,” his tone offered pain if Dervas didn't, “You keep giving that guy drinks, drugs, whores, whatever he asks for okay? For him happy hour doesn't end, tabs never have to be paid. Push as much as you can into him. Don't worry - I'll be round a couple of nights a week to pay you. That sack,” he kicked disdainfully at the one he'd just dropped, “Contains a thousand drakes, payment enough I'd say. If he asks don't tell him, just give him more drink. Understand?”

Dervas nodded, his mouth was dry.

The man disappeared into the night.

Dervas walked back into the bar. He looked towards the dark man's room. Who are you? he thought again, And what have I gotten into?


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Look behind you and see an ever decreasing number of ghosts. Currently about 15.
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Olen
post Mar 15 2010, 10:46 PM
Post #2


Mouth
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Joined: 1-November 07
From: most places



Sorry for the late reply, the last few days have been rather busy. Anyway I thought it wise to mention that the second half of the story has increasingly heavy referances to the other story with Firen in it (Yesterday's Shadow) and though it should more or less make sense without having read it some things may not be so clear. It's still quite a while before the referances get frequent though.


24. Sealing Night

It was dusk, the undramatic sunset was smothered by the fog which rose from the warm marsh. A shrouded night to hide my plans from the gods above. We slouched in the shadows of the bank of the stream until we were just fifty paces from the compound wall. There was a dip in the ground by a meander in the water, I squatted on the driest tuft I could find, trying to keep too much mud from reaching my fresh washed clothes and polished armour. The argonians were already plastered in it, brown shapes against the mire.

Hides shifted and fidgeted like a Khajit on bad sugar. I turned to her, "It's time. Try to give the sign, if you can't and we hear no alarm then we'll proceed in five minutes." She frowned, for a moment I expected another argument but then she just nodded and dove into the waters. Instants later she was gone.

Grey-tail and Hassde rose from their crouches and began to stretch, "If this comes off," said the Grey-tail then paused as he stretched a series of pops from his back, "It is going to shake the Dres up badly."

"What will we do with all the escaped slaves?" I asked, "Send Tehei and Kieras with them?" Tehei looked up at her name but I'd discovered she spoke no cyrodiilic, I managed the argonian for escaped slaves in an attempt to explain. Kieras, who had half followed, rattled off his own explanation too quickly for me to follow.

"We'll see," said Grey-tail, "Now where's that Hides? It'll do her good to do this, however much she didn't want to. That girl has too many demons."

I didn't reply, I didn't care and was running though the plan in my head. Seeing what might go wrong, guessing reactions and counters. It was unlikely to be a catastrophe, but it could easily fail, my lack of escape route was particularly bothersome but I had to show bold action if I was to get a better hold in the group.

The silence stretched, I wandered about my escape route. "If I don't get out there's a man I need you to rescue from the compound down by Tear," I said to Grey-tail, "His name is Varnan..." As I said it I realised how long it was since I'd uttered his name. The only other survivor of up north.

I pushed the thought away, I'd kept busy, or drunk, enough not to face it. Now was most definitely not the time. I watched the walls, and waited. Not long now. But I wanted that sign. I was aware of the others glancing to me occasionally and knew that soon I would have to send them. Then I saw something on the near wall above the river. I stood for a better look, a guard had fallen and was draped limply over the parapet. Then he was pitched over the edge, I saw Hides scaled head. She half raised a hand to make the sign then glanced behind her and jumped back inside. I cursed inwardly and crouched again. My thighs ached.

"That was the sign," said Hassde.

"No that was half the sign, then she saw something."

"We should go in and help her," said Keel-ha. He'd been little keener than Hides herself on this bit of the plan.

"Shh," I listened. Nothing but the blissfully unaware cicadas chirruping in the fen grass, "No alarm, whatever it was she dealt with it. Go." I nodded to the river. They needed no second urging. Four soft splashes later and only Keel-ha accompanied me. "North," I said to him, "Let's see this storehouse."

We kept low and skirted north round the compound, there weren't as many guards as there might have been and we could, possibly, have tried climbing somewhere else. But I preferred to lessen the risk where possible, and wanted to be near to the guardhouse. Keel-ha was a mud stained shadow flitting from one hollow to the next, I was less inclined to sneak and more worried about my clothes. Dusk falls quickly so far south though so I doubt they'd have seen us had we walked upright. Once at the north we paused again, the three buildings were black monoliths against the dark sky, blunt monuments to the subjugation of Argonia. A fire burnt on the flat roof of the grandest, the manor I assumed. It was further into the plantation but I could just make out drifting figures in rich clothes circling the flames like moths in the evening heat.

Keel-ha bristled, I could see why. We crept closer to the dark back of the storehouse which loomed over the wall. Once we were quite close I put out a hand and stopped the argonian. "Do you see a guard?"

Elsewhere they had been easy to see against the sky but here the wall behind blotted out the silhouette. "He's patrolling," I heard surprise in Keel-ha's voice. I looked along the wall and sure enough a guard whom I'd assumed was guarding the end nearer the gatehouse was wandering back towards the store. And, my heart rose, he was carrying a torch. We might as well have danced round the walls wearing a pink guar costume from a Curio play for all the night vision he'd have. I motioned forwards and crept on until we were just a few paces from the wall.

"String your bow," I whispered, "Can't miss eh?"

Keel-ha took his longbow from his back and loped a sting round the nock bent it and looped the other side. I wandered what the bowstring was made from not to fail with water on it. He pulled out an arrow and fitted it. We waited. The guard wandered along the wall, paying no attention. When he came behind the store I nudged the argonian and nodded. He half-bent his bow but waited until the guard was at his closest before loosing. The arrow flew straight and took the left side of his chest. He fell with a wheeze and the muffled clatter of armour. The torch fell to the wall-top but didn't go out.

I swore.

"We need to move, if anyone sees that..." Keel-ha said.

I glanced along the wall and my heart sank, "It's worse," I pointed to another guard who was idly patrolling the other way towards his fallen comrade.

This time Keel-ha swore with impressive vigour.

"Could you take him out before he sees it?"

"Kill him? Yes. Silently? That's up to the gods." Keel-ha shook his head and stuck two arrows into the ground in front of him and stood straight.

I waited and tried to remember to breathe. That damned torch. If it had gone out he would have been near before he saw the corpse, an easy job. Now he needed shot at range. I wasn't sure whether Keel-ha was going to wait until he was behind the store. It was a risk either way. I left it to him.

He chose the middle ground and waited until the guard was just in line with the wall. He pulled an arrow from the ground and drew.

In that moment I saw it was warped. "No-" I managed before he let fly.

It flew awry but we had a bit of luck and it missed altogether. The wind of its passing was enough to rouse the guard from his thoughts though. He looked up and saw the torch.

And did something fatally stupid: he ran towards his fallen comrade. The second arrow was true and took him though the head. He was dead before he hit the ground. I sigh relief, I was already running at the wall. It was smooth but I put a foot against it and leapt up it. My fingers found only plaster, but it was old and the damp had gotten to it. It crumbled like stale bread. I slipped down a little then it held. I reached up with my other hand and gouged another hold with my finger nails. Then repeated, cursing when I tore one. It took me almost a minute to get my fingers over the top and pull myself over but no other guards came. Keel-ha followed.

We were in.


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Look behind you and see an ever decreasing number of ghosts. Currently about 15.
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Posts in this topic
Olen   Burning Today   Oct 11 2009, 09:26 PM
treydog   Woo-hoo! This starts at a run and doesn't...   Oct 11 2009, 10:19 PM
Olen   Next bit and longer this time. It won't make ...   Oct 18 2009, 04:39 PM
treydog   Saying that I "enjoyed" reading the late...   Oct 20 2009, 05:26 PM
Olen   I admit I did lay it on a bit heavy in the last pa...   Oct 24 2009, 01:35 PM
treydog   Your descriptive power again places the reader rig...   Oct 25 2009, 03:10 PM
Olen   3. Finding the Scent The Watcher's Club scre...   Oct 30 2009, 10:33 AM
canis216   Well done. Real taut storytelling as ever.   Nov 1 2009, 10:34 PM
treydog   Woo-Hoo! Another excellent scene. Please con...   Nov 2 2009, 10:39 PM
Olen   Thanks for the comments. Without further ado: 4....   Nov 6 2009, 01:18 PM
RavenMind   I've just finished reading through this, and y...   Nov 11 2009, 02:38 AM
Olen   5. Last Visit Firemoth was dead by night. I slip...   Nov 11 2009, 04:54 PM
minque   Really interesting, just finished reading this one...   Nov 16 2009, 12:01 AM
Olen   Thanks for the comments. This part was hard to ed...   Nov 17 2009, 10:17 PM
minque   Story.Good.More It's an old nord proverb...   Nov 18 2009, 10:47 PM
Olen   7. Fresh Morning In the bottom of a dry gulch I ...   Nov 22 2009, 02:00 PM
Olen   8. Circles I found the track the farmer had desc...   Nov 27 2009, 05:38 PM
Olen   Appologies for the delay, RL has conspired to make...   Dec 8 2009, 11:50 AM
Olen   Next bit, as ever replies and criticisms are appri...   Dec 14 2009, 04:08 PM
Olen   11. Choice I sat bolt upright. Instantly awake....   Dec 19 2009, 02:44 PM
Syndelius Daerleth   LOVE the prologe very good! i havent read the ...   Dec 20 2009, 02:15 AM
canis216   Again, fabulous storytelling. You really get insid...   Dec 20 2009, 03:35 AM
Olen   Yes... My utter reliance on spellchecking shows it...   Jan 5 2010, 04:40 PM
Captain Hammer   Finally managed to get caught up on this one, Olen...   Jan 6 2010, 05:44 PM
minque   Uhh....jeez I like this one! A bit brutal but ...   Jan 8 2010, 07:14 PM
Olen   Cheers for the comments, it's appriciated. Ye...   Jan 12 2010, 01:07 PM
Olen   This was meant to be part of the previous part so ...   Jan 14 2010, 12:54 PM
Olen   15. Running In the end I just headed west for Al...   Jan 20 2010, 12:22 PM
Olen   16. The Fire of the Moment On my way to the taver...   Jan 25 2010, 03:53 PM
canis216   Ah, excellent work once again. I look forward to s...   Jan 26 2010, 04:10 AM
Olen   17. False Light Pandemonium ruled. People ran, ...   Jan 30 2010, 08:09 PM
canis216   Wow! Intense!   Jan 30 2010, 09:32 PM
Olen   Cheers for the comments, there's still pleanty...   Feb 4 2010, 03:20 PM
Olen   The story changes direction somewhat now so if you...   Feb 9 2010, 07:43 PM
Olen   20. News in the South Outside the high sun beat ...   Feb 15 2010, 04:56 PM
Olen   21. Glittering Opportunity I rolled off the bed....   Feb 22 2010, 03:41 PM
Olen   22. Reasons and Excuses It was the small hours o...   Feb 28 2010, 11:55 AM
canis216   I really enjoy the grit and intensity of this stor...   Mar 3 2010, 01:35 AM
Olen   Thanks for the comment, this piece wasn't the ...   Mar 7 2010, 10:47 PM
Winter Wolf   Awesome write. How typical that even after all pos...   Mar 16 2010, 06:37 AM
SubRosa   I started reading from the first post, and still h...   Mar 16 2010, 03:37 PM
Acadian   WooHoo! What's not to like? First person...   Mar 16 2010, 09:15 PM
mALX   I have to catch up still, but I got such a kick ou...   Mar 16 2010, 09:53 PM
Destri Melarg   As the others have said, I just started reading th...   Mar 18 2010, 04:55 AM
Olen   Woo lots of comments. Thanks for the kind words, ...   Mar 19 2010, 03:07 PM
Remko   I got to chapter 10 and I love it! The charact...   Mar 19 2010, 05:38 PM
haute ecole rider   Well. I'm all caught up now on this thread (ha...   Mar 19 2010, 07:46 PM
mALX   As for the pubs, I could swear you had been in som...   Mar 20 2010, 06:55 AM
SubRosa   I am still working my way through. I love the real...   Mar 21 2010, 10:55 AM
Olen   Hmm, missed that, but it's sorted now. Along ...   Mar 21 2010, 02:21 PM
Destri Melarg   Just passed chapter 11 now. Firen is an incredibl...   Mar 22 2010, 12:28 AM
SubRosa   I am up to Chapter 21 now. I am not sure if it is ...   Mar 22 2010, 08:23 PM
Olen   I've never read Heart of Darkness so that wasn...   Mar 24 2010, 01:34 AM
haute ecole rider   This is a hard chapter to write, I can see that . ...   Mar 24 2010, 04:35 AM
mALX   What Hauty said, and I'd like to add that your...   Mar 24 2010, 03:33 PM
Destri Melarg   Okay I’m all caught up. Impressions: First, th...   Mar 25 2010, 06:08 AM
Remko   I just finished the last chapter and all I can say...   Mar 25 2010, 04:25 PM
SubRosa   I am finally caught up. Whew! You certainly kn...   Mar 26 2010, 01:33 AM
Remko   True, we still don't really know what he is. I...   Mar 26 2010, 12:06 PM
Olen   Wow so many replies... No update today but I thoug...   Mar 26 2010, 05:06 PM
Winter Wolf   Remko (and SubRosa) - It is mentioned a few times...   Mar 30 2010, 05:33 PM
Destri Melarg   Remko (and SubRosa) - It is mentioned a few times...   Mar 26 2010, 05:47 PM
Olen   27. Bitter Dreams The slaughter finished I plodd...   Mar 29 2010, 02:20 PM
mALX   Really great detail, even right down to following ...   Mar 29 2010, 04:40 PM
haute ecole rider   Excellent overview of what comes after the sack, w...   Mar 29 2010, 04:45 PM
SubRosa   Grey-Tail the other Argonians certainly have passi...   Mar 29 2010, 04:49 PM
Remko   I thought it was a very clever - and logical - cha...   Mar 29 2010, 06:22 PM
Destri Melarg   Firen’s concern over the fate of the slaves and hi...   Mar 31 2010, 01:10 AM
Remko   Okun is a name from "Independance Day", ...   Mar 31 2010, 05:15 PM
Olen   Thanks for all the comments again, they're gre...   Apr 2 2010, 03:47 PM
Remko   aaarrgghhh.... MORE!   Apr 2 2010, 04:17 PM
Destri Melarg   Oh man, this is really starting to get good! ...   Apr 2 2010, 09:34 PM
mALX   Oh man, this is really starting to get good! ...   Apr 2 2010, 11:17 PM
SubRosa   Now we see the fallout of the raid, which Firen ha...   Apr 2 2010, 11:12 PM
haute ecole rider   Agreed that the swim at the end of the chapter was...   Apr 3 2010, 12:07 AM
canis216   Never realized Argonians can be such prudes! ...   Apr 3 2010, 05:01 AM
Winter Wolf   A masterful chapter. Lovely command of dialogue th...   Apr 3 2010, 07:07 AM
Olen   Thanks for the comments, oddly the last chapter wa...   Apr 6 2010, 04:28 PM
mALX   Huge amount of detail in this chapter, written nat...   Apr 6 2010, 07:22 PM
Destri Melarg   I agree, very powerful. I am really growing to ad...   Apr 6 2010, 08:58 PM
SubRosa   This one line stays with me the most, due to it po...   Apr 6 2010, 11:02 PM
Remko   Loved it, the sneaking part was exceptionally well...   Apr 7 2010, 02:40 PM
haute ecole rider   I"m still reading and enjoying this. This la...   Apr 7 2010, 06:22 PM
Olen   Thanks for the comments all, I appriciate them. I...   Apr 11 2010, 06:18 PM
SubRosa   Excellent description of the ford. You vividly cap...   Apr 11 2010, 07:21 PM
haute ecole rider   Awesome! The description of the river, the rem...   Apr 11 2010, 07:26 PM
mALX   The last paragraph is HUGE! Very powerful writ...   Apr 11 2010, 08:12 PM
Olen   Well seeing as the last piece was short as I wante...   Apr 13 2010, 05:49 PM
Destri Melarg   Chapter 30: I stand in full agreement with the oth...   Apr 13 2010, 11:12 PM
SubRosa   An exciting entry, made so by the palpable tension...   Apr 15 2010, 05:47 PM
Remko   Loved chapters 30 and 31 forreasons mentioned abov...   Apr 16 2010, 04:20 PM
mALX   Yes, more more!!! You always seem to...   Apr 16 2010, 07:16 PM
Olen   Thanks for the comments, I've taken a lot more...   Apr 17 2010, 08:34 PM
SubRosa   That was a very exciting battle! You showed th...   Apr 18 2010, 08:35 AM
mALX   mALX's comment does raise a question for me -...   Apr 18 2010, 09:18 AM
Destri Melarg   The battle sequence was excellent. I was hoping t...   Apr 19 2010, 01:16 AM
canis216   Powerful. I'm not sure what else I can say.   Apr 20 2010, 04:01 AM
haute ecole rider   Sorry for not posting sooner. I have read this tw...   Apr 20 2010, 02:45 PM
Olen   Thanks for the comments, so many have inspired me ...   Apr 22 2010, 04:52 PM
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