Concerned, But Powerless Options

[Petra Arkanian]

Ok. First, I need to know if this is where i post my fanfic. I'm gonna continue my story here anyway, but please, someone tell me if it's not. Okay. For the story.
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Written By Petra


PART 1


The last thing I remember is a member of the Imperial Guard staring down at me. He was glaring (although I couldn't really be sure, as his helmet was blocking my view of everything) at me, with a sword in his hand, and a shield strapped to his arm.
It was then that I passed out.

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When I came to, I was lying on a small, uncomfortable cot. In a jail cell.

Not good, I thought. Not good at all. I had never been the follow-the-law-to-the-ends-of-Tamriel type, of course, but I knew a few basic rules.

1: Do not get put in jail.

Well, okay, that's the only one I know. But still.

"Ahh, you're a pretty one, aren't you? A Nord, no? But it is all wasted. You're going to die in here! Don't you see? Die, Nord, die!"

The blue-skinned Dunmer ranted on for some time, his loud voice echoing through my prison cell, and amplifying his overly-annoy, nasaly-sounding voice.

'Just my luck,' I thought. 'Not only do I have to be next to this stupid Dunmer, but my cell has to have good accoustics, too!'

As soon as I decided that I would punch him when he next spoke, the sound of footsteps drowned out his rant, taking my opportunity of violence with it.

"Hurry up, Barus! I won't risk the Emperors' life on your slow gait!" snapped a bossy Breton female. But why was she talking about the Emperor ? That was madness! Even I was taught to show respect to him, and here she was, mentioning his name as causually as if...

Oh. The woman stepped forward, and behind her was a Redguard. And behind HIM was the Emperor. Nevermind, then.

"Oh, Captain Renevault, I highly doubt that I am in any danger with you three around," said the Emeror, sounding amused. The man in front of the Emperor chuckled.
Then the Breton (Captain Renevault, I assumed) saw me.

"What's this prisoner doing in here?!" she barked, spitting the word 'prisoner' out of the back of her throat, as if it were something nasty she had found on the back of her shoe. "This cell is supposed to be off limits!"

"Usual mix-up at the Watch, probably," said the Redguard, Barus, sounding exasperated. Renevault fingered a key, and opened the door.

A man appeared behind the Emperor, and I barely had enough time to gasp before he attacked him. Surprisingly, the Emperor held his own, until the attacker, who was wearing shiny silver armour, slashed across his face.

But Captain Renevault threw herself in front of him, and the sword connected with her head. She cried out in pain, and looked at me eyes pleading, although I had no idea what for. Until I realized that she was looking at her sword. I scooped it up, and stabbed the attacker in the heart.

This post has been edited by Petra Arkanian: Dec 7 2010, 01:26 AM

[Destri Melarg]

I completely agree with everything that mALX and Acadian have already said. One of the things that I like about your writing is the lack of pretension. You have a very direct and engaging style that makes it easy for me to overlook silly details like the constraints of Alex’s age and just go along with your story. That is something that people spend years trying to achieve!

I also appreciated the bio, but it did raise one question: You say that Alex has no experience with emotion. Why then would she sacrifice her standing with the Brotherhood by refusing to kill her foster parents? Julian and Mary Delphiki would not have had much contact with her if she were spending all her time training in the Cheydinhal Sanctuary. Deadened to emotion as she is/was (her increasing experience with emotion makes for a GREAT subplot, if you ask me), she would have seen the Delphiki’s as just two more targets, no?