Does this thread belong here?, pieces of quest Options

[ghastley]

Most of the threads in this forum are naturally about "my character's adventures in a TES world", and the rest are meta-threads about writing them.

I'm coming from a completely different direction, or maybe not. I'm trying to create quest mods for Oblivion with a whole lot of NPC's who have linked stories, and I need all the help I can get with those. It's not entirely a different problem from writing the support cast in a regular FF, but it does leave out the central character, who will be the player, and I don't want to write that one.

I like to build a character in Oblivion and play it for a while before making an NPC from it, as this helps to give me some idea of how a pure mage thinks, or an archer, or an axe-wielding Orc, and I can make the NPC more credible that way. I'm currently playing a stereotypical big dumb blonde Nord called Hidy Heidi, who aspires to joining the Imperial Mountain Riders and patrolling the Jerrals on a white bear. I started her off trying to use poisoned daggers and stealth, but found that it's not too viable at low levels, because the damage she could inflict was never enough for a one-hit kill, and using a dagger put her too close for comfort in the remainder of the encounter. So she switched to a Claymore to better use her Blade skill, although she still tries a sneak attack with a dagger first, some of the time. She'd probably use the Claymore if she got a bear to ride, so maybe it's for the best.

This experience now has to be distilled down to some dialog for the NPC in-game, and that of her colleagues, and that's the sort of thing I'd want to post here for criticism and advice. And the content of books, notes, journal entries for the quests. Many of you have experience of rewriting bits of lore for your narratives, or fitting a new piece into the incomplete jigsaw puzzle Betheda provided, so I know it will help me if it works.

Heidi is intended to become part of this mod, of which only the first two quests have been released as a beta. I have another dozen or so in development, including an arc of quests that happen after the player is both CoC and Madgod, based on the idea of Dagon taking revenge on the player by opening gates in his/her new realm.

[ghastley]

@mALX : The start's the easy part, it will be hard keeping any momentum going once I get close to the point I'm at in building the mod. But that shouldn't happen for a few episodes yet.

@Acadian : Thanks! Considering that Unna has only about three lines of dialog in her quest, I probably gave her much more depth here than she gets in the game. But there's always a chance she'll have more to say as I add quests in the future, so it doesn't hurt to think her through a bit more now.

Next is the other quest that's released so far. Most of the dialog is taken directly from the game, and Claudia has much more than Unna did.

Claudia's Tale

She was sitting at the table, reading a book, when she heard the trapdoor creak open. Expecting it to be one of the Watch Captains, she glanced over to see which one, but the trapdoor just closed again, and nobody came through. She was living in the unused captain's quarters in the North watchtower of the Imperial City and so there was a watch barracks just below. She assumed one of the Legionaries had had second thoughts about coming up to talk to her. The Captains didn't allow that.

When she looked back up from the book a moment later, however, there was a man standing next to her. And not just anyone, the Hero of Kvatch!

"What are you doing here?" she asked, somewhat impolitely, but she was startled by his sudden appearance.

"I came to ask you the same question," he said. "One of the beggars told me he'd seen you going into this tower. What's a Mountain Rider doing in a city watchtower? Shouldn't you be on patrol somewhere?"

Claudia explained. "I'm supposed to be on patrol in the Jerall mountains, but I don't have my bear to ride. I've been waiting for weeks for it to arrive from Skyrim, cooped up here in this tower. As the only woman here, I'm getting a bit too much attention from the guard captains, if you know what I mean. You couldn't help me out, could you? I just need to know what's happening about my bear."

"The white bears from Skyrim make wonderful mounts for the icy mountains. They're so sure-footed on the ice and snow, as well as being a strong ally," she continued. "I'm so looking forward to having one of my own! All my Nord colleagues already have theirs."

"But you're a Redguard." he said, making it sound like a question.

"Oh, and my name's Claudia, forgot to tell you! Yes, it's unusual for a Redguard to train as a bear rider, but I lived in Skyrim when I was young. My family moved here to the city not long ago, and I missed the mountains so much. Father said I could go back when I was old enough to look after myself. Training as a Legion rider made sure I could do that! Of course, nothing's perfect, and I do have the problem with the guard captains."

Claudia took a breath, and changed the subject. "But how did you get up here? And why didn't I see you come in?"

The Hero smiled, and slipped a ring onto his finger, fading into almost total invisibility. "Chameleon enchantment. This is a Ring of Shadows I took from a Dremora mage a while ago. I'll need it again to get back out undetected. Don't worry, I'll find out about your bear."

The trapdoor opened and closed again, and Claudia went back to her book.

. . .

The Hero re-appeared just as mysteriously the following day. This time he took off the ring as soon as the trapdoor was closed. Walking over to the table, he unfolded a map. "Can you show me Sky's Edge Cave?"

Claudia pointed to a mark close to the border, where Skyrim and Hammerfell meet Cyrodiil. Yes, she knew that area. "It's not far from the cities of Elinhir and Falkreath, so it makes a good place to hold goods brought over the borders. Is that where my bear is? Can you take me there?"

"First tell me about the Watch Captains."

"When I was in training, I slept with a Legion recruit because he was a Redguard like me, and the only one in a class of Imperials," Claudia began. "I guess I felt sorry for him, because the Imperials all looked down on him as an outsider, and I know they felt the same about me, the only woman. Anyway, when they found out about us, they all expected me to sleep with them, too, as if they had a right to it!"

Claudia paused a moment to scowl at that thought. "So I complained to the captain, and he said he could work something out. They made me an 'honorary junior captain' and gave me these quarters away from the men. I soon found out what I had to do in return. At first they gave me a lot of wine and tried to get me drunk. But I learned drinking in Skyrim, and they couldn't keep up with me!"

She smiled briefly at the memory of the captains all passed out on the floor as she went to bed alone. They'd played a lot of the old drinking games, but she knew how to cheat better than they did, and after a while they were incapable of noticing that they were the ones consuming the most. "Well, at least there aren't as many of them to deal with, and I did get my own room. Besides, it was only until my bear arrived, so I didn't expect it to be long."

The hero drew a piece of paper from his pocket and handed it to her. "Look at the date on that."

She read the document. It was the invoice for the delivery of her bear to Sky's Edge Cave, and it was dated the day before she'd moved into these quarters! "Where did you get this?" she asked, angrily.

"My Ring of Shadows helped me let myself into the Legion headquarters and I just happened to find this in a locked desk drawer" he replied. "I had expected to find something in one of the captains' quarters in the other watchtowers, but they had more sense than to keep it in any personal space. So we don't don't know whose idea it was."

"That doesn't make a lot of difference," muttered Claudia. "I just want to leave here right away, and go get my bear!"

"Won't you be cold up there in the mountains?" he asked, pointing to her bare skin. "You're not a Nord, after all."

"No, I'm a Mountain Rider, so my armor has an enchantment against cold. I need more than the Nords do, but not much. After all, both my grandfathers were pure Nord, so I'm only a Redguard on the outside."

That seemed to satisfy him, and he slipped his ring back on his finger and let her lead him out to the city streets.

. . .

The journey up to the Hermaeus Mora shrine was all along the roads and trails, so it passed fairly uneventfully. There were the usual bandits and wild creatures from time to time, but together they had little problem dealing with them. From the shrine, they headed North across the open snow, looking for the cave entrance. Their prospects of finding it looked as bleak as the landscape; all the rocks looked the same.

"Is that a trail over there?", asked Claudia suddenly, pointing.

"I think it is, but which way is the cave? I guess we'll just have to try one direction and hope."

Naturally, their first choice was the wrong one, and the trail soon petered out without leading anywhere. They turned back the way they'd come. Just around the corner from where they first joined the trail, there was Sky's Edge Cave.

The two entered, hoping the courier and bear were still around.

There was the bear, and behind him, a tall Nord dressed in furs was checking the contents of a crate. His name was Jokull, and he wasn't exactly happy that he'd had to wait so long for someone to collect the bear. He calmed down a bit when they explained about the captains, but they could tell that there was something else on his mind. Apart from the bear delivery, he felt that he was owed extra for the long wait.

"Those 500 septims are a start. But then I need you to get my amulet back from the ogre that stole it. Ogres like shiny things, and one of them stole my amulet when I was making another delivery here. I didn't want to leave the goods I was carrying to chase after him, in case bandits would steal everything else."

Somehow they didn't quite accept his reason for not chasing the ogre himself, but that still left an amulet that needed recovering. Claudia needed some time to introduce herself to her bear, so the Hero left the cave alone to look for the ogre. It wasn't long before he returned and handed an amulet to Jokull. At last a smile came to the Nord's face. "Now I can head back to Falkreath at last," he said. "And I'll admit now that I was concerned about the bear taking to a Redguard. They're really picky about who they allow to ride them, and I'd only seen Nords on their backs before now".

Claudia repeated what she'd told the Hero about her grandfathers being Nords, and he nodded in agreement that she was Nord enough, if the bear thought so. She wondered if his distrust of Redguards had anything to do with living on a disputed border, but she kept quiet about that.

The Hero broke the awkward silence by asking her where she'd be patrolling, now she had her bear at last. She told him that she'd been assigned the stretch from the Hermaeus Mora shrine to the junction of the trail with the one from Sancre Tor to Bruma. "Then you'll be meeting Unna soon" he replied, "Her patrol ends where yours begins, near the shrine. I met her the last time I was up here in the Jerrals, and helped her with a Daedra problem."

"There aren't any Daedra on my patrol, are there?" asked Claudia. "I'm not sure I've trained enough for them."

"Just bandits, mostly" he reassured her "and maybe an ogre or two."

"My bear can handle those," she smiled "With my help, of course".

This post has been edited by ghastley: Jun 18 2013, 10:20 PM