Nemesis Options

[Jacki Dice]

This is a little something I've been toying with for awhile. I've decided to bring it out to the forums here. This story will include the original version of Kalila Blackstone, from Madness Helps me Save Myself. This version of her has absolutely no ties to the one borrowed in the story.

Speaking of, Madness Helps me Save Myself will continue as planned. Sometimes working on something separate for a while soothes my writer's block.

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1

“That which is done out of love always takes place beyond good and evil.�
--Friedrich Nietzsche

In a perfect world, it would have been an assassin. Or maybe a bandit. It would be someone who was out to hurt her, who justifiably deserved to die. However, as Tara Karminova clutched her dagger to her chest, she knew it would be no such person. The world was too imperfect.

She looked around the dark alleys of the Imperial City Market District for someone no one would miss. Guilt weighed in her heart for even thinking that. Did someone’s life have less value just because they had no one to miss them? Of course not. But, she needed someone whose death wouldn’t prompt a thorough investigation. Maybe a skooma addict.

Oh, dear gods, what am I doing? She leaned against the wall of one of the shops. Her heart was no longer fluttering and her stomach no longer churned. Instead, she seemed to simply accept it. That was what scared her. “It’s for Clarissa,� she reminded herself. “It’s for her.� She clenched the grip of her dagger tightly and continued lurking through the alleys.

At first she thought she had blended in quite well with the street urchins in the Imperial City. She simply threw on an old, dirty robe that had torn a little on the bottom. Her brown hair was unbrushed and thrown back in a messy bun. Once she saw the beggars in person, however, she realized how far off she was. Their clothes weren’t just dirty, they were barely intact enough to keep them out of prison for indecent exposure. None of them wore the soft cotton that she was in. They appeared to be stitched together from odd pieces of fabric and sackcloth. Tara was also far too healthy looking. Her cheeks were somewhat plump and the robe hugged her frame tightly, revealing that she didn’t often go hungry. The beggars were nothing but skin and bones. The biggest difference was their eyes. Tara could easily tell who had lived on the street by the hardness or loss of hope in their eyes. There was no way for her to imitate them in that way.

She turned behind the Copious Coinpurse into a small garden. It was empty save for a young woman sleeping on the ground. Tara crept toward her, running her finger over the black soul gem stashed in her pocket. It would have been much easier to cast some sort of spell on her, but Tara thought a stabbing would look far more ordinary than magic.

The girl stirred slightly as Tara approached. Tara straddled her and turned her on her back. She was pretty. She had quite a young face. She was probably no more than nineteen. Tara hesitated for a moment before raising her hand. A violet flash erupted from her fist and washed over the girl. Once that was done she took out the dagger and plunged it into the girl.

The girl opened her eyes wide as blood oozed onto Tara. A scream rose from her throat and Tara quickly covered the girl’s mouth with her free hand, stabbing again and again until the girl stopped moving. She wished she had known where to plunge for a more painless and instant death. That part of her research had been overlooked. Tara took out the soul gem and was satisfied with the glow of the girl’s soul.

She got up and panted, staring at the girl’s body. Did she have parents? A sister? Probably not, since she had been sleeping there alone. Still, Tara was overcome with mixed emotions.

“It’s for Clarissa,� she said to herself.



Tara had to hold in her disgust as she stared upon Clarissa’s corpse.

Three years had passed since Clarissa Blackstone’s murder and time had not been kind. Clarissa’s skin was gone for the most part, only remaining in small patches. On the pieces of skin around her temples, sat dry tufts of her once luxurious black hair, though the slightest brush would turn it to dust. Her bones were not white, like the models shown at the Arcane University. Instead they were a filthy brown. The sockets that once held beautiful grey eyes were now empty and covered by a paper thin layer of skin. The gown she had been buried in had long since been eaten away. Though she went out and bought a new robe, Tara did not look forward to redressing her. Logically that shouldn’t have bothered her any more than digging Clarissa up or even setting her body on the kitchen table.

Tara wanted to pass the time doing something other than staring at Clarissa, but she was unable to take her eyes off of her. She was repulsed but fascinated at the same time. When she finally tore her eyes away, she decided to head into the basement to distract herself.

Just yesterday, the basement was full of alchemical equipment. The shelves had been lined with empty bottles and crates full of filled ones ready to be sent off to the different Mages Guild halls. Jars of ingredients sat along the windows. Now it was empty. The windows were boarded. A metal collar attached to a long chain sat in the center of the room. Tara picked it up and tugged it with all her strength. It held fast to the wall. She sighed deeply and dusted off her hands. Hopefully it would withstand the added strength of the undead.

She took a broom from a corner and started sweeping. Clarissa still deserves cleanliness, she thought. But the basement was usually kept neat and there was nothing much to sweep. She finished in seconds. She looked at the Mages Guild banners still hanging on the walls. Her eyes welled up with tears. How could she still keep those up knowing what she was going to do? How could she ever look at Arch-Mage Traven in the eye again?

With a trembling hand, she took the banners down. She tried telling herself that it was to keep them from getting ruined, but deep down she knew it was because she felt unworthy.

When she returned upstairs she was pleased to see that the hourglass was nearly empty. It was time.

For something so complex, it was strange that it was so simple to accomplish. She had imagined an elaborate ritual involving candles and conjuring. Strangely, the hardest part had been obtaining the soul gem. That and getting the soul. She closed her eyes, forcing away the image of the girl she had killed. She couldn’t afford to think about it. All spells, complex or not, required confidence and concentration.

Her home along the Lake Rumare was close enough to hear the temple bell from the Imperial City. As it rang twelve times, Tara placed the soul gem directly over where Clarissa’s heart had been. She focused on the soul inside, transferring it the way she would to an item.

The soul was stubborn. Even in death, it resisted Tara’s demand, almost as if it knew that it would cease to exist as itself. Tara trembled violently. Her heart pounded hard and she broke into a sweat. The soul would cooperate. It had no choice.

Tara grunted hard when the soul finally entered Clarissa. She panted heavily as the gem crumbled into dust, falling into Clarissa’s bare rib cage.

Clarissa’s eyelids fluttered. She sat up, turning her face toward Tara. Though the sockets were empty, she could feel the intense stare going straight through her. Tara backed up instantly. Would Clarissa remember? Or would she react with hostility? Clarissa opened her mouth, though the only sound that escaped was a dry crackle. Her body wouldn’t return to a normal living being until she received more souls.

“Clarissa,� Tara whispered. “Do you remember me?� She took a step forward. “I’m your sister.�

Clarissa tilted her head back and forth. A chunk of skin plopped on the floor causing a surge of bile to rise in Tara’s throat. She swallowed it back down and forced herself to ignore it.

“Everything is okay now,� she said. “You’re back home now.�

She held out her hand. Clarissa ignored it, seeming to be more confused than anything.

“She’s just in shock,� Tara said to herself. She glanced at the robe. She decided to put it on her when she had more skin as there was nothing really to cover.

She led Clarissa into the basement and locked the collar around her neck. “This is just to keep you safe. When you’re back to normal you can have your old room back. I’ll even get you into the Arcane University like you always wanted.� She sighed, not knowing why she said that. That wouldn’t be possible. Everyone knew that Clarissa had been dead a long time.

Clarissa crackled again, though Tara doubted that she understood anything she had been saying anyway. No need to feel like a liar, right? she wondered. “I’m going to go clean upstairs and then I’ll have to fix up your grave outside. I can’t have it looking like it’s been recently disturbed. I’ll be back soon.�

Once she was back in the living room, she locked the basement door and then placed a plank of wood in front of it. She couldn’t chance Clarissa getting out into the open. She would be killed on sight. Tara couldn’t have that. She refused to lose her twice.

She immediately set out sweeping up the living room and kitchen. There was so much dirt. Too much. Should any guild mates come for a visit, she felt it would cause immediate suspicion. Maybe it was just paranoia, but at the same time, her sudden insistence to work from her home instead of the guild halls already seemed strange. Sure, months had passed since then, the nagging feeling remained stuck in her mind.

Though it had to be done, she couldn’t keep her mind on her task. She felt drained. She sank to her knees staring at the basement door. She could hear Clarissa shuffling faintly, the chain jingling with her every movement. She glanced at the turquoise banner on the wall bearing the Mages Guild symbol. Her life as she knew it was over. She wept.



This post has been edited by Jacki Dice: Dec 23 2019, 07:08 AM

[Jacki Dice]

Black Hand~ Yes, Kalila (hopefully) will be the one to show the other side of the coin when it comes to Tara's actions.

haute ecole rider~ I wouldn't say Tara is more brooding, but as she has a lot at stake in the Mages Guild, she is super, super secretive!

Grits~ I'm glad its interesting I was worried about topping the adventures of a poor mortal getting tangled with the Madgod

Zalphon~ Thank you Out of all the major characters in the story, Tara is actually the most recent creation and I think that gives her the advantage as she isn't over developed therefore easier to make work naturally.

mALX~ Lol! Yeah this has been hidden away for very old characters that don't quite fit with Wrothken's tale

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Chapter Two: Graduation Day

The kitchen was once Tara’s favorite room in the house. The warmth of family meals always made it seem brighter than normal. Now it was lonely, what with Kalila at the University , her mother, Rhianna Karminova at sea, and Clarissa dead.

Well, not so much dead anymore, she reminded herself as she sliced some vegetables for dinner. But without digestive organs, Clarissa had no need for food yet. Tara dreaded the day she would need to eat. She still hadn’t found out whether or not necromancers fed their “creations� human flesh out of necessity or for kicks. She huffed in disgust. Those were the ones that needed to be stopped. The ones that did it for nothing. At least she had a reason for it, a very good reason… not that it would make a difference if she were caught.

“Clarissa,� she called to the open basement door. “When you can eat again, what would you like me to make? I can fry up some chicken or maybe a casserole? And of course I’ll make you a big cake! Chocolate pumpkin marble, your favorite! Do you remember?�

The jingling of Clarissa’s chain was the only answer. She knew it would be, but she felt like hearing her voice would be helpful, maybe even soothing, as the long process went on.

Tara went down to take a look at her. Some of her old toys had been brought down, but seemingly ignored. Clarissa simply walked around the room as far as her chain would allow. Tara frowned. She couldn’t believe how long it was going to take to get her even partially back to her old self. It was like having a mudcrab wander the basement! Still, getting her closer meant killing again. That was something she would happily put off if possible.

The faint sound of galloping caught her attention. It wasn’t the casual trot of someone on patrol. It was quick, the rider knowing exactly where they were going. And it was heading for the house.

Tara quickly shut the basement door and locked it. The good thing about Clarissa not having vocal chords was that she couldn’t cry out and cause suspicion. Yet.

The galloping stopped and was replaced with heavy footsteps. There was a knock at the door.

Tara took a deep breath before opening it. Act natural.

A battle mage stood before her dressed in his uniform. “Wizard Karminova?� Though it was a question, they both knew that he was fully aware of who she was.

“Can I help you with something?�

He pulled out a letter and handed it to her. Hannibal Traven’s official seal was on the front.

She tried to keep her face expressionless. After all there was no way he could have found out already and even if he did, he would send a whole group after her, not just one man. The battle mage stood there waiting. Traven must have wanted a response.

Dear Tara,

I hope you are doing well. It has been awhile since I have been able to visit the Skingrad quarters, though now that you are working from your home, perhaps we may be able to visit more often.

Kalila has done very well in her studies, though she requires a bit more training for restoration. Her instructor says the skill is present but it seems like an issue with her mind that prevents her from being able to heal properly. I have recommended the Anvil Mage’s Guild to her. As you know, it’s a lovely place to be, though admittedly there have been rumors of rogue mages in the area. Of course Kalila is far too on the straight and narrow to get herself caught up with such things.

I was wondering if you would be willing to speak at the graduation ceremony. I heard you will be present and it’s always a treat to hear from our successful alumni. Please let me know as soon as possible so I can make sure we have a slot from you. Hope you will join us.

Arch-magister Hannibal Traven

She sighed. Thank the gods it was only that. “Oh, alright.� She looked at the battle mage, though not before glancing at the basement door. “Please, come in while I write out my response.�

She showed the battle mage to her living room, kicking herself mentally for not straightening up further. A few of her alchemical supplies were still scattered on her armchair and on the coffee table. The Mages Guild banners were still draped on the couch.

“I had to rearrange some things,� she offered before he could ask. “With my sister graduating, I wasn’t sure if she’d be staying with me for awhile.�

“Ah…� he said. He had no reason to disbelieve her, but Tara still felt nervous.

Dear Archmagister Traven,

I am glad to hear that Kalila has done well, though it comes as no surprise to me. She has been dedicated to her studies since childhood. I’m glad she will be able to get some further training in restoration before she goes on to battle mage training. “

She pressed the end of the quill to her lip.

I would love to do a speech at the ceremony. Really, it would be an honor. I will see you then.

Wizard Tara Karminova

“Here you are,� she said folding it up. She didn’t bother sealing it. Frankly, she wanted the battlemage out of there before any strange jingles came from the basement. She handed him a septim for the postage and another as a tip.

“Thank you, ma’am,� he said with a nod.

“Ma’am?� She asked aloud after he left. Good gods, she wasn’t that old, was she?



The morning of the graduation, Tara went down to visit Clarissa. Clarissa had been sitting cross legged on the ground. One of her dolls was before her. Clarissa didn’t touch it. She simply stared. Tara wondered how she could see from empty sockets. When she heard a faint, steady crackling from the girl it occurred to her that it could be a form of echolocation.

Tara knelt next to her and waved her hand in front of Clarissa’s face, slowly. Clarissa mimicked the motion. She gasped softly as she realized what an opportunity she had. No one in the Mages Guild had studied very much of the undead. Doing so would cause far too much suspicion and could result in being kicked out. However, it could be beneficial at least for personal study.

Everyone knew what the undead did, but not how. Figuring that out could greatly help adventurers and mages clear out some of the haunted locations or caves of necromancers. The evil necromancers, she corrected herself, as she was technically a necromancer herself.

“Clarissa, I have to go out for a few hours,� she said. “Kalila is graduating from the university today. Do you remember her?�

Clarissa only crackled.

“She’s grown up a lot since you… since you last saw her. She misses you very, very much even though she won’t talk about it.�

Hell, Kalila wouldn’t talk about much of anything these days.

Tara stood up and glanced back at Clarissa. She would be fine in the house alone. Tara just hoped no one tried to break in while she was away.



Kalila sat with the rest of her class, all of them dressed in bright purple robes and the traditional caps. Of course hers kept slipping and frankly, it looked ridiculous. She couldn’t wait to toss hers up with the rest of her class… and abandon it afterwards.

She stared up at the stage where Arch-magister Traven was speaking. Dreams, hopes, future, blah, blah, blah. She looked behind him. High Chancellor Ocato was there, looking about as bored as Kalila was. Next to him were the heads of the Cyrodiil Mages Guild halls and a few other prominent mages. And Tara.

Something was off about her. She was usually poised and confident looking. Today she seemed nervous. She kept wringing her hands and glancing elsewhere.

Traven stepped down and the audience applauded. Someone else took the stage, basically echoing Traven’s sentiments.

Kalila turned her gaze toward the section for the students’ families. Proud parents from all over wept and clapped, occasionally shouting out their child’s name. A couple even blew loud horns when a speech was particularly touching.

She scanned the crowd for her own parents, but didn’t see them. That meant that her mother was probably not there. Rhianna Karminova was known for many things, but blending in wasn’t one. She would have brought her entire crew for the occasion and would be hooting and hollering throughout the speeches. It was just as well, she supposed. If her father happened to be there, then there would be yet another ugly fight between them. Kalila didn’t feel like playing referee on her graduation day.

Another round of applause went by and another speaker stood up.

Kalila looked down at the ground. She sighed. She had spent so many years at the Arcane University. It was going to be strange not going every day. It would be even stranger being in Anvil. For the first time in her life, she would be truly on her own. Well, not entirely. She knew a few people who would be going there as well but this time Tara would be nowhere near and save for the Guild, she had no one she had to report to. It was exhilarating yet anxiety quivered in her stomach.

After the last applause, Tara stood at the podium.

“What an unforgettable day for everyone present,� she began. “It wasn’t too long ago that I sat in your seats,� she said to the students.

Sure, if nearly a decade isn’t too long ago, Kalila thought, pursing her lips to keep from giggling.

“I still remember it like it was yesterday. My mother stood proudly in the audience, with a flag she had enchanted to let out fireworks every time she waved it. My two younger sisters sat with her, beaming with pride, as I do now looking at one of them among her students.� Tara smiled at Kalila.

Several people turned and glanced at her. Kalila wanted to sink into her seat. Did she have to be so sentimental all the time?

“This is the moment where life begins whether you go into your chosen profession or continue your education even further through the Mages Guild. The best part about right now is that you can still do anything, anything at all.�

As Tara began going on about successes and achievements, Kalila thought about the day Tara had graduated. Though Tara remembered it well, much of it was a blur to Kalila. She remembered Rhianna’s flag and also Rhianna fighting with her father over whether or not he had any business there, as he was not Tara’s father. She also remembered her mother getting fined for assault over it. Most of all, she remembered Clarissa jumping up and down and screaming Tara’s name as she walked across the stage. Tara was right. Clarissa had been beaming with pride over it, as though she had a hand in Tara’s success.

A change in Tara’s voice grabbed Kalila’s attention. She sounded distant and she was looking away again. “And you may find yourself doing things you never imagined you would. And you’ll find that beliefs you held dear, that were once unshakable, you just might think the opposite one day. Just keep an open mind and listen to your gut above all else and you’ll do just fine. Thank you.�

Kalila clapped along with the rest of the audience, though she couldn’t escape the feeling that something was definitely up with Tara.


This post has been edited by Jacki Dice: Dec 23 2019, 07:17 AM