Memoirs of a Morag Tong Assassin - Solstheim, Chapter One: Pure as Undriven Snow. Options

[Black Hand]

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This post has been edited by Black Hand: Sep 21 2013, 01:08 AM

[mALX]

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I apologize, this weekend was too hectic to get a read in and give your writing the focus it deserves. I'm here now.

Therefore, any member at or above the rank of Master may come to Vivec to request the position. Again, I will not forbid ancient rights and traditions. However, if there are those who would insist upon them; I urge them to consider I did not achieve the rank by accident or favoritism, but rather through skill and accomplishment.

Those that waive the option to allow me to retire will face the full scope of my skill.

This was absolutely Awesome, powerful - and looks like trouble is ahead for Seth now! That was technically throwing down a gauntlet to them, he will have to clean out the whole top rung of the Morag Tong now!


The whole letter from Andarys was quoted below, but I snipped it for the sake of not spamming your thread - but had to quote the ending for the chilling shock of it :

Be wary,
Goren Andarys."

I nearly choked out my tea as Pene suddenly spread her wings and cawed loudly, and I caught the faintest sound of rustling cloth, and a blade being unsheathed, behind me.

GAAAAH !! Now we know where Seth was when the Dragon broke ... urk!

I guessed Sabine because the Raven was cawing a warning. (Otherwise I would have been torn between it being Sabine or his own wife, lol).

"Dunsapil is an Ashlander. Humility is a major trait that is required of them. Boasting is shameful, and yet there is a place if it can convince a challenger to stand down. The victor can win with words or sword. Hence, there is no need for Dun-Ahhe to slay me now. Indeed it would be shameful." I explained as the Ashlander sat in a smug silence.

"I think I shall like this Hall." he said quietly.

This whole bout was brilliant !! Seth obviously out-manipulated them, I so would have loved to see this scene drawn out into a whole chapter in itself. As quickly as it ends there wasn't time to savor the moment, it felt prematurely ... ended.

it seemed she wanted to give me an earful rather than a mindful...I wasn't as eager to hear it, so much as wanting to get it over with.
... I lit my hackle-lo pipe, and I poured myself a bit of brandy, I took a puff and a swig before replying.
...as the brandy began to run its course through my veins.

You wrap so many human emotions, thoughts, and actions into your characters that they come to life - this sentence is a prime example - perfect!



The most powerful example of this comes next :

The realization hit me as her breath hit my neck. I glanced at the stain on the wall.

In a flash I stood up. Pene falling off, and officially killing the moment.

The bottle of Cyrodiilic Brandy staining the wall - what a powerful moment of memory you evoked in the reader with that scene, I could see the stain he left there to remind himself that (that argument) would never be over - Huge Write !!!! I am officially addicted.

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