Finder
Joined: 4-May 13
From: Somewhere between here and there
If you are talking about Skyrim, I recommend this website. It outlines a great course of action for setting up your mod profile. A lot will depend on your machine's capabilities, but there are "lite" versions of some mods that will help keep performance at a playable level. It is what I used as a guide to get the game where I like it.
For Oblivion, I can't help you. I have just recently reloaded the game and have very few mods loaded for it so far.