An excellent addition to what we have seen already. With some things revealed and many others left hidden. All of which makes for a story that will keep me reading.
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Several shafts of moonlight fell through the trees. Forest sounds all around. Crickets chirping, katydids scratching, moody owls hooting, the sun itself gone to slumber.
Wonderful descriptive writing there. You quite effectively put me into the place where Jane finds herself.
Now for the "other". Just a few places were the tense shifted and one spelling variation.
QUOTE
But that does not mean she became irrevocably compliant. When she gazed at that poor fellow back in Six Fishes with panicked emotion, this was not acting.
"did not mean" and "that was not" to maintain consistency
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slight-of-hand
In this form, "sleight-of-hand"
QUOTE
She began thinking back, and yes, this seems to have been their plan.
"that seemed"
As to when you actually do want to switch between past and present- for example, if someone in the present is telling a story about something that happened earlier.... my way of indicating that is to switch to italic for the "past" part as a way of distinguishing it. I hope that works for the reader- it helps me keep things straight, anyway.
Happy to see you continuing and I look forward to more. Well done!