The stories so far, Edited and ready to roll. Options

[Troika]

OK, this thread will contain any and all stories that are posted on the geocities site and labelled as edited. These babies we don't have to worry about until it actually comes time to stick em in the game.

I will sort out this thread... in other words, please do NOT post up stories yourself... it could lead to multiple copies which could prove problematic later.

Also, please keep posts in this thread to a minimum. This is mainly just a place where people have quick and easy (although not necessarily organised) access to the stories already finished with.

[Troika]

Section: Jokes & Riddles

Written by Pedrias Gasaan (UberJordan)

I have traveled the land hearing many a racial slur, but none more often than that of the Orc.

The amount of jokes about them seems endless.
Here are a few of the many.
I in no way intend this to offend Orcs or those who are connected with them. I am quite fond of the Orcish myself, this is simply a compilation of that which is against them.

- Pedrias Gasaan
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What do you call a Nord euphoric and infuriated from consuming excess amounts of mazte?

An Orc
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The Altmer counts 10, the Argonian counts 10, and the Orc counts 10. What is wrong here?

Orcs cannot count.
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What do you call an Orc who can read and write?

Exceptional
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How do you tell the difference between an Orc male and an Orc female?

You can't!
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An Orc ties the straps on his boots. This makes him?

Educated
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I must say, Orcs are good for something. Their armourers are second to none.
At what?

Draining Imperial funding!
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Why did the Orc die in the wilderness?

He mistook an Ogrim for his wife.
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What do you call an Orc in an Imperial jail?
A problem
What do you call every Orc in Tamriel in Imperial Jail?
Problem solved.