Life and Times of a Selfish, Shady Dunmer. Part one., The story actually has several. But we focus on just one or two. Options

[lord_wanhoop]

Part 1.1

"Profitable hunting, lads?" asked Arrille as he looked at the two Dunmer before him. The left one was bald, with a scar where his left eye had been, and various other scars besides. He was covered in chitin armor, save helmet and shield, and had a shortsword at his belt. Jiub grinned and nodded to his counterpart, a slightly younger Dunmer. This one also looked shifty, but in a different way. Jiub looked like he'd won, well, survived, countless street fights. The other mer, Dasreth, looked as if he'd managed to trick his way out of them every time, and had something cocky to show for it. Dasreth was less muscular than Jiub, with a face that the poets could be inclined to call 'darkly handsome'. Whatever that meant. His short black hair was dishevelled, and he had three earrings, one in his left ear and two in his right. He was less heavily armored than Jiub, with only a cuirass, greaves, and boots, and also carried an iron shortsword.

"Well enough. Feast your eyes on these assembled pieces of plunder, Arrille. I'd say the lot's worth about hundred drakes total."

The Altmer nodded, his eyes gliding over the pile of items looted from the smuggler cavern of Addamasartus that Dasreth had pulled out of his backpack and onto the table. He did not know about the two bottles of skooma and the thirteen packets of moon sugar that they had also found, and this, Dasreth thought, was for the better. With the Census and Excise Office right under his nose, he likely wouldn't be quite inclined to trade in those things. Arrille shoved the assorted pile of weapons, alcohol, armor scraps and clothing into a crate. "Tolvise, pay these gentlemen, please. I'm going down to sort through this."

A pretty young Dunmer woman nearby nodded, gliding over to the counter and counting down exactly hundred drakes from Arrille's money box, then put them in a pouch and handed it over to Dasreth. Dasreth took it eagerly, putting his hand on hers and caressing it with a finger. While doing this, he said:

"Thank you...Tolvise. If I can ever do anything for you, just tell me. It'd be my pleasure."

Tolvise removed her hand from Dasreth's, and looked him in the eyes. Dasreth, not taking the time to check the expression on her face, gave her a wink and a grin.

PETCH!

And was returned a slap. Tolvise walked away in a huff, muttering darkly. Behind him, Dasreth heard Jiub emit a raspy chuckle. Still rubbing the fiery red spot on his cheek where he'd been hit, the Mer turned around angrily.

"What's so bloody funny, scarface?"

"You are," Jiub replied.

"I don't see you doing any better! Besides. That used to work. I tried it so often. Must've gotten rusty in the clink... happens often, I heard. There weren't a lot of pretty ladies around there, and they put me in a cell with this orc who took male bonding and prisonerly brotherhood a tad too seriously."

"What happened to that one then, Dasreth?"

"Well, Jiub, he got shivved mysteriously after telling me how cute he thought my butt was. End of story."


Post scriptum: this is my new attempt at a story based on Morrowind which I recently resumed playing. Do not expect the protagonist to be a noble good guy. Do not expect him to be completely stark raving evil, either. For the time being these may seem like tales of humorous incompetence, but do bear in mind that this personage is still Level One. My game uses many mods, such as the CM Partners mod which allows me to have Jiub as a companion. By reading this work of fanfiction, skimming it, laying your eyes on its title on the topic list or breathing, lord_wanhoop legally owns all rights to your soul and the soul of your firstborn child. Many NPCs were hurt physically, mentally, and/or emotionally during the making of this fanfiction. Who cares? We sure don't. LaToaSSD is sponsored by Hlaalu Egg Mining Inc. If you are still reading this, comment already. lord_wanhoop's writing efforts are supported purely by positive yet honest feedback and dubious skooma mixtures.

[lord_wanhoop]

Ask, and you and various other people could recieve.

Part 1.2

The next day, Dasreth and Jiub emerged into the daylight sun as soon as it deemed fit to show its face, Jiub looking a bit more well rested than the other mer. Dasreth, however, had been observing a certain resident of the town and then swept in to take his assorted riches. He then kept them for himself rather than returning even a share, effectively doublecrossing two people who'd offered him friendship. When Jiub was told of this, he chuckled. Neither Dunmer liked any of the two mentioned people. The two of them soon left, heading a bit west and taking a hike cross-country rather than on the beaten path. The pair of thieves noted a few kwama foragers near a rock, so they decided to take a closer look. What they saw shocked them a bit: an Imperial man, a rolled-up scroll and money bag clutched in his hands, lying face-down on the ground, with the kwama nibbling at his left leg. After dispatching the kwama with their shortswords, Dasreth took the scroll (and also the money) and read it.

"Looks like this guy's the local taxman, Processius Vitellus. Well, was."

"What do you think happened, Dasreth?" , Jiub asked. Dasreth winked, and handed the scroll to the other Dunmer, crouching over the corpse.

"Well. You may think he got killed by a beast of some kind while trying to make a run to greener pastures with embezzled money, but there is evidence disproving it."

"Like what?"

"Elementary, my dear Jiub! First off. See how he doesn't got any blood or claw marks on him? Only these bruises at the throat. That means he was violently strangled, and kwama don't do that. Secondly, if he wanted to make a run with other people's money, he would've had more with him. This scroll says he got more than twice the amount here from our friend Arrille alone. And thirdly, he was headed out into the Bitter Coast, which ain't exactly a green pasture of any kind even if you happen to be from Seyda Neen."

"Good thinking there. That makes sense. So what do we do now? Take the money and run?"

"That's possible. Or we could head to the Excise guys and offer to solve it for them, may be more in it for us that way."

And so the two thieves returned to town. As it turned out, Socucius Ergalla was more than willing to offer a substantial reward for the punishment of the culprit. Thusly, the pair split up to find more information from the townsfolk. Dasreth looked around and trained his eyes on Indrele Rathyron, another one of Seyda Neen's fair flowers of womanhood, and one that he had been able to chat up with moderate success and a notable absence of (threats of) slapping. He semi-suavely sidled over to her, seeking eye contact.

"Afternoon, Indrele."

"Is there something I can do for you?" Indrele replied, keeping her face indifferent.

Oh yes, honey, I'm sure I could think of plenty of things you could do for me...and to me... , Dasreth thought, but what he said was:

"I found Processius Vitellus murdered. Thoughts?"

"He's dead then? Well, it sounds cold, but he had it coming for a while. Nobody in town liked him; everyone knew he was taking some of the tax money for himself, but Socucius wouldn't do anything about it. The only one who could stand him was Thavere Vedrano, the lighthouse keeper. She's a bit of a loner, but seems like a nice enough person...but the rumor's been for months that the two of them had a thing with eachother."

"A thing, eh?" Dasreth snickered. "I suppose I'd best go talk to her, then. Thanks, Indrele. If I can ever do anything at all for you, just ask me." Dasreth grinned widely and winked. Then he closed his eyes in anticipation...

...but instead of a slap, he felt his cheek being touched by some vague, soft, not unpleasant feeling, then the sound of a woman giggling and walking away. Opening his eyes, the thief wondered just what in Oblivion's name had just happened. Then, Jiub came walking up to him.

"Thavere Vedrano...," Dasreth said.

"..the lighthouse keeper...," Jiub added

"...was said to have a thing for Processius...," Dasreth continued

"...so we should go speak to her." Jiub finished.

Any views violently exhibited regarding the murder of tax collectors are purely the characters' own and do not speak on behalf of the LaToaSSD staff. And now a word from our sponsor: try new Hlaalu-Brand Xtra-Lite eggs! Five times as small as your regular kwama egg, and for exactly the same price! Buy Hlaalu products. We care about your money.