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Serene of Cyrodiil, chapter 7, Comfort is given, Justice is taken... |
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haute ecole rider |
Apr 11 2010, 05:58 PM
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Master
Joined: 16-March 10
From: The place where the Witchhorses play
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Well. I wanted to read the WHOLE thing before commenting. I'm glad I did (read the whole thing, that is). Yet I'm not glad I did (wait to comment, that is). There are so many good things in this story to remark on, and now I don't know where to begin. Others have commented on the strength of the emotions in the story, the experiences of the characters, and the rich internal landscape you have developed. I can only echo those previous comments. I've written pieces that have a similar emotional intensity, and I can see the challenge in writing something like this for extended periods. I can understand why it has taken you so long to come this far (what five years?). It's hard to sustain that level of intense writing when you have RL constantly intruding on your thoughts and time. It's a full time job in and of itself, and unfortunately it doesn't always pay the bills. It's amazing stuff, really, and I will wait for you to put Chapter Eight together and start your next thread. Maybe not patiently, but I will wait. You have done so well this far. S.G.M.!
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Doommeister |
Nov 4 2010, 08:20 PM
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Retainer
Joined: 20-October 10
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I've just finished reading your stories, and I must say excellent work. Now, where is chapter 8? It's been a year and a half since your last update, and even though I've only just read the whole lot, I'm already getting withdrawal symptoms.
S.G.M
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As the assassin draws near, despair! As the assassin draws near, pray for mercy! As the assassin draws near, beg for your life!
The hands of fate have been cruel to you my friend. I will grant you a quick and painless death.
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SubRosa |
May 14 2011, 02:45 AM
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Ancient
Joined: 14-March 10
From: Between The Worlds
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I finished reading the entire thing a few months ago, but never made a comment in this, the most recent thread. I had a grand time reading Serene's tale. From the horrific events surrounding her imprisonment, to her eventual rise to power in the very end. There is much to like about the tale. For starters, the protagonist is not the "player character" in the game, as they tend to be in so many fan fics. Using Trey in the PC's role was a nice way of filling those shoes with a character that other readers here would recognize. Serene is also not an uber warrior cleaving hordes of foemen left and right with her mighty thews. Talk about a stereotype overused in the fantasy genre! Instead she is a regular woman, filled with vulnerabilities, doing her best to survive and follow her conscience. This makes her a lot easier to identify with, and empathize with, than said muscle-bound heroes. Lastly, Serene has a long way to go. The story is a journey not only in the external world, where she goes from place to place, and eventually ends up on the top of the Redoran ladder; but it is also just as great an inner journey, in which she is transformed from that shell-shocked girl so badly used by her family into a woman of will and determination. Quite the character development, and the kind that makes you want to cheer for her every victory. So basically this says it all: This post has been edited by SubRosa: May 16 2011, 03:48 AM
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minque |
May 21 2011, 09:15 PM
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Wise Woman
Joined: 11-February 05
From: Where I can watch you!!
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Oh my my...I'm almost crying here....Thank you Rosie for your wonderful words...much appreciated! And treydoggie my oldest friend here....the poem is wonderful, I feel an urge to continue, because I now see, thanks to your exquisit impersonation of Athynae, that there really is important for her to know the rest!
Serene bows her head and sends blessings to all of you!
mALXie, Rosie, Treydoggie, Blackie, Danny ...YES ALL OF YOU!!!!
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Chomh fada agus a bhionn daoine ah creiduint in aif�iseach, leanfaidh said na n-aingniomhi a choireamh (Voltaire)Facebook
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treydog |
May 21 2011, 11:23 PM
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Master
Joined: 13-February 05
From: The Smoky Mountains
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QUOTE(minque @ May 21 2011, 04:15 PM) Oh my my...I'm almost crying here....Thank you Rosie for your wonderful words...much appreciated! And treydoggie my oldest friend here....the poem is wonderful, I feel an urge to continue, because I now see, thanks to your exquisit impersonation of Athynae, that there really is important for her to know the rest!
Serene bows her head and sends blessings to all of you!
mALXie, Rosie, Treydoggie, Blackie, Danny ...YES ALL OF YOU!!!!
I know we are all THRILLED to hear that we may be leading you toward a continuation. Your story is simply too good to remain unfinished. One note- the Athynae who wrote the poem is not the character in my story, but a very real person who became the inspiration for my fictional half-elven warrior princess. The only reason the poem appeared under my screen name was because I knew she would not post it herself.
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The dreams down here aren't broken, nah, they're walkin' with a limp...
The best-dressed newt in Mournhold.
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Doommeister |
Jun 20 2011, 10:30 PM
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Retainer
Joined: 20-October 10
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gah still no update? why so cruel minque? update pretty please?
And Athynae, patience? We have all been waiting for over 2 years... not all of us are young you know. Heh I guess I can wait a bit longer anyway
This post has been edited by Doommeister: Jun 21 2011, 02:47 PM
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As the assassin draws near, despair! As the assassin draws near, pray for mercy! As the assassin draws near, beg for your life!
The hands of fate have been cruel to you my friend. I will grant you a quick and painless death.
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