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> Memoirs of a Morag Tong Assassin - Solstheim, Chapter Three: Sides Chosen.
McBadgere
post Jun 25 2013, 01:05 PM
Post #61


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There is much to love about this chapter...

The Skaal were excellently done...Graring was a blast!...

QUOTE
“This is the only thing I know of that can harvest the stalhrim; and for Shor’s sake stop calling it ‘sacred’!”


QUOTE
“Also, yer friend outside is ready to take with ye. Normally, I’d just as soon let the horker have ‘er, but, ye seem to know her, and I’ll not disgrace anyone who has tears shed over their passin’.”


I absolutely loved these two quotes...Just brilliant stuff...

Stalrhim was definitely my fave armour/weapon type...Fantastic stuff, and I thoroughly enjoyed doing the quests in the village to acquire it...

Plus, I loved the way you had the pickaxe there, and not some quest reward right at the start...Sort of thing...Brilliantly done..

Excellent stuff...

Love it!!...

Nice one!!...

*Applauds heartily*...
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Black Hand
post Jun 30 2013, 05:37 PM
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Captain Hammer
post Jul 1 2013, 06:01 AM
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More fun with Sethyas's magnificent attempts at coffee brewing. Hooray!

That said, good on Falco for appreciating a nice dark roast. I too like my coffee darker than Nocturnal's night. Can't make a good Ristretto if it's cut with milk or cream. Falco's speech through the preparation process is a nice bit of insight into the man's philosophy. I can just imagine Carnius trying to rush the process to extract the coffee as quickly and in as much volume as possible, only to have a ruined product and scalded taste buds to show for it.

Some nits:

QUOTE(Black Hand @ Jun 30 2013, 12:37 PM) *

I finished my lonely requiem for Coventia, when I saw the shadows being cast from the rising sun behind us. The whole experience was a very dark one for me, and my life was a series of dark events, it seemed. It was hard not too focus on them, being that the whole reason for my exile was the knowledge I had gained in the Ald-Ruhn marketplace. Yet, I still lived and breathed. In a way, that was enough. One of the more grim assassins in the Morag Tong used to tell us that to see the face of your victim after the deed was done, should be an uplifting experience. It meant you were alive, and had survived the encounter. I just couldn’t see things in that light right now. Too me, it was just another brick added to the burden I carried.

The highlighted "too's" show where a few too many o's were added improperly to some "to's". Namely, in the infinitive usage ("I want to run away.") and the prepositional usage ("I gave a birthday gift to me.") use only the one 'o' "to." Since you use it properly elsewhere in the post, as well as the otherwise appropriate use of "too" for the accompaniment usage and adverb-of-excessiveness usage, I think it's an error in muscle memory of double-tapping the "O" key on your keyboard or your auto-correct playing mean mind games on you, like a legendary Daedric quill that gets sent by the Madgod.

There are others in the rest of the post, I just thought I'd point it out so you can go a-hunting for warward "o's" and harvest them before you run out.


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minque
post Jul 1 2013, 07:17 PM
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QUOTE
trauma root tea


Freudian misspelling? smile.gif

Yes Seth ehh Dralas you handle the killing of Coventia just as I expected....hmm

But you really must learn to make coffee....your attempts made me laugh....

Now let's see about that Stahlrim...weird stuff if I may say so.

Excellent writing....make me..WANT MOOOOOORE!


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Chomh fada agus a bhionn daoine ah creiduint in aif�iseach, leanfaidh said na n-aingniomhi a choireamh (Voltaire)

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Black Hand
post Jul 3 2013, 02:39 AM
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Captain Hammer
post Jul 3 2013, 04:18 AM
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QUOTE
So if I learned anything from the responses of the last update, is that I can't write for carp! tongue.gif


Have you tried writing for salmon? I hear it's supposed to boost brain power, and according to a man by the name of Adams, may also be full of doubt.

That aside, proper use of 'too' and 'to' this time. Good job.

Nice way to combine Seth...er, Dralas's first real experience with a Solthseim blizzard and the introduction to Ulfgar the..., er, just Ulfgar. Particularly the fact that he keeps the Old Way and would honor the precepts of Sacred Hospitality or Guest-Right. In our world, Odin would be proud. I am sure the same applies to Shor in this far-flung corner of all that is.

I can't find fault in your knowledge of hypothermia, its onset and treatment, and I speak from everything just short of firsthand experience. I did learn from Ski Patrol rescuers that have probably seen a case every year. Not fun stuff.

There is, however, one thing I'd point out to Dralas about his hunting style. He doesn't usually hunt with others, Pene excluded. And she doesn't support him the same as you'd expect your pack mates to do. In that, he's probably less wolf or bear, and more like a typical big cat (excluding lions). Given his nocturnal preferences and Dawn-and-Dusk connections, I'd call him something closer to a Jaguar, or a Leopard.


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Black Hand
post Jul 4 2013, 10:51 PM
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minque
post Jul 9 2013, 11:43 PM
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Just read these tho latest updates....and I have decided I need to read them again, tomorrow or rather later today, because I'm not fit for commenting as I want to just now, too tired....

There is one word though that comes to me now just before closing down....and that is AMAZING!


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Black Hand
post Jul 11 2013, 02:46 AM
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Grits
post Jul 20 2013, 12:15 AM
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I loved the quiet undertones in coffee making part. Then Pene speed-eating the beans made me grin.

“What’s yer name?” He asked.

“Uh…Uncle Seth?” I replied.


Aawww…. *sniff*

Ulfgar was a treat. The snowstorm is certainly one of my favorite segments.



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Black Hand
post Jul 22 2013, 12:40 AM
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Black Hand
post Jul 26 2013, 12:00 AM
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mALX
post Jul 26 2013, 02:54 AM
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*

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Grits
post Jul 26 2013, 02:13 PM
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I blinked. "Yes, if that's alright." I asked, deeply afraid I was offending some unknown Nordic code of conduct that might land the two of us into a death match.
laugh.gif High stakes cultural discomfort, hilariously expressed.

Seth and Pene’s dialog continues to delight.


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Black Hand
post Jul 27 2013, 03:23 AM
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mALX
post Aug 3 2013, 09:13 AM
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McBadgere
post Aug 8 2013, 08:04 AM
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Fair dues...Thoroughly enjoyed this little catch-up...

So many nice touches to it...Not least that little adventure with Falco and the report... biggrin.gif ...Nicely done fast-travel mimic... laugh.gif ...

Brilliant stuff...And if yer still writing to the post, I'm still in absolute awe of it...

Nice one, as ever...

*Applauds heartily*...
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