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> Redemption., Cause being evil sucks.
jack cloudy
post Jan 4 2008, 10:44 PM
Post #1


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Joined: 11-February 06
From: In a cold place.



Ok, another start. I was going to hold off on this one for a few months but the point is, if I don't switch my focus around regularly, I'll go nuts. And letting it rot on my harddisk feels like a waste. I'm also a bit worried for spoilers regarding my other stories but hey, this might actually serve to keep my interest in other stories fresh. A spoiler here leads me to ask myself 'then how did it exactly happen?'.

So umm, yeah. Let's get going.

part 2

Redemption

Chapter 1: End of the wait.

Drip….drip…..drip. Cold water dripped down between the bars and along the rough stone. The crackle of thunder roared through the chamber, the flash of lightning erased the darkness for a brief moment.
,,Bloody bad weather today.” The Dunmer who inhabited the cell mumbled. He glanced at the cell opposite his and sneered. He then walked up to the bars and gripped them with his hands.
,,I said, bad weather today.” He repeated. For a few seconds, he waited. Then he scoffed and walked to the dirty rag that was his bed.
,,Not very talkative today, are we? Well, I envy you. All that water coming in through that peekhole. Fresh water! I haven’t had fresh water in months!” He spun around and faced the bars again.
,,In months, you hear me?! Then why don’t you take advantage of the circumstances and enjoy this luxury your cell provides but mine doesn’t?!”

The man in the other cell lay on his back in a corner of the cell, hands folded under his head, legs slightly spread, feet almost lying in the pool that spread on the floor. The window of his cell lay at the bottom of a slope, which allowed a steady stream of muddy water to enter. To any casual observer, it would seem that he was asleep, comfortable despite the Spartan conditions of his surroundings.
,,Don’t get over-excited. Water isn’t the most important thing in the world.” He replied softly without opening his eyes. The Dunmer grit his teeth.
,,You and your self-righteous proclaimants. Then what is the most important thing in the world, wiseguy? Well, out with it. Show us the great wisdom of the Altmer.” He spat.
,,That is a different thing for each individual. What is the most important thing for you?” The Altmer answered calmly.

The Dunmer kicked one of the walls in his cell.
,,Answering a question with a question of your own? Well then, listen carefully. I don’t know why but I’m just going to tell you! The most important thing for me is a woman! I haven’t had my fun with a woman in five years, I’m telling you. Five years! That’s horrible!” He said.
,,But at least I’ll be out of here soon. And when I do, I’m going to enjoy it all the way. I’ve always been popular with the ladies, unlike you. A different girl each night, and then some. Makes you jealous, doesn’t it?” He gloated. The Altmer shrugged, the only motion he’d made in the last two days.
,,I don’t see any need to be jealous.” He said.

The Dunmer cocked an eyebrow and stalked back to the bars.
,,No need? The Altmer says there is no need to be jealous! Oh, but now I remember. You don’t feel the need to be jealous because your blood is so pure and there is a lass waiting back home who was born just to suit you. Born just to suit you, all thanks to the breeding program you High Elves have. All thanks to your quest for purity.” He snickered and watched his fellow prisoner intently. If he’d been expecting a sign of anger or any other emotion, he would be disappointed.
,,Believe what you will.” Was all the Altmer said.

Thunder roared again. Then, silence, safe for the soft clatter of the rain. The Dunmer had returned to his bed and watched the dark sky outside his window.
,,Believe what you will. He’s got issues. I bet his mother always beat him whenever he had impure thoughts.” He muttered to himself hatefully. He then rose.
,,Believe what you will?” He repeated, louder this time.
,,Well, I know what I believe. I believe I’ll use the cache of money I’ve stored under the loose rock in the wall. I was going to save it for later, but this place and you have gotten on my nerves, so there. I’m going to have some fun in this place, even if it kills me!” He decided and pried loose the brick he’d mentioned.
,,Be carefull what you wish for.” The Altmer warned. The pool had now crept up to his bare toes, but he did not move them. Even though the water was near freezing, he did not seem to be bothered at all by it. Meanwhile, the Dunmer scooped up the coins he’d hidden and counted them. He chose to ignore the other.
,,Fifty-four Septims. That’s enough for the guards to buy themselves a couple of bottles.” He spoke, got up and raked one of the coins across the bars.

,,What are you making all that racket for, prisoner?!” A guard inquired in a gruff tone. He’d come to investigate the cause of the noise. The Dunmer looked the man up from head to toe.
,,Tell me, friend? Have you been doing well at your card-games?” He then chuckled. The Imperial’s brow furrowed.
,,None of your bussines, Dark Elf scum! Now keep it quiet down here!” He spat. He waved his arm across, pointing at the Altmer in the other cell.
,,Take an example from him. He’s been here since before I was born, and not even once did he cause trouble.” He added. The Dunmer smiled, revealing two incomplete rows of yellow-brownish teeth. Perhaps he’d once been popular with the ladies but in his current state, popularity would need some help.
,,Just as I thought. You’ve been losing badly, haven’t you? Well, I just happen to have the solution to that particular little problem of yours.” He whispered and flashed a coin. Instantly, the guard became twice as attentive.

,,How much do you have?” He asked in a coarse whisper of his own.
,,Twenty-seven in total.” The Dunmer lied. He then leaned in as close as he could without hitting the bars with his forehead. Thunder echoed through the prison complex.
,,Twenty-seven perfectly legitimate Septims. Twenty-seven shiny bits of gold and copper. They could be yours, so very easily….for a small favour, of course.” He offered. The guard licked his lips and let his eyes slip to the coins the Dunmer now held up in his hand, yet still out of his reach. He thought of going back to the barracks and taking the keys to the Dunmer’s cell, so he could take the money by force. But if he did that, his commander would have him fired and thrown into a cell instantly on the charge of accepting bribes. He would be better off listening to what the man had to offer.
,,I’m listening.”

The Dunmer leaned in even closer, resting his forehead against the bars.
,,Good, good. You see, I’m feeling rather…lonely. While he doesn’t cause any trouble, our friend over there is a poor conversationalist. A man of few words. So I was thinking, if you could help me out, perhaps provide me with….suitable company? I would be more than willing to help out a friend who is in need of a financial boost. Rub my back, rub yours?” He whispered. The guard looked into the crimson eyes of the prisoner, glanced at the Altmer, the coins and weighed the risk. If the Altmer talked, he would still be in trouble. But the gold-skinned fellow appeared to be sound asleep, impossible as it might sound with the thunder and lightning playing outside. The Imperial grinned, a greedy grin.
,,For a friend, why certainly. It would be a pleasure, no, an honour to help. In fact, I just seem to remember that prisonblock C is undergoing renovations. We need to relocate the current occupants. I was just wondering where to move some of them anyway. I’ll see if I can send over a…better conversationalist.” He said and held out his hand. The Dunmer grinned and handed over some of the coins.
,,Half now, half upon delivery.”

This post has been edited by jack cloudy: Mar 6 2012, 08:29 PM


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Posts in this topic
jack cloudy   Redemption.   Jan 4 2008, 10:44 PM
The Metal Mallet   Hmm, I wonder what we're getting into here... ...   Jan 5 2008, 08:33 AM
jack cloudy   How many do I have going? Err......I lost count. :...   Jan 5 2008, 01:14 PM
blockhead   Interesting. Grittier, not quite your usual frene...   Jan 5 2008, 02:29 PM
darkynd   After reading the first chapter, I'm definitel...   Jan 5 2008, 06:23 PM
blockhead   After reading the first chapter, I'm definite...   Jan 6 2008, 05:06 AM
Olen   Hmm this is good. And indeed quite a lot darker w...   Jan 5 2008, 11:34 PM
The Metal Mallet   Things are moving nicely. It certainly has been a...   Jan 6 2008, 01:18 AM
jack cloudy   Same here.....Oh, wait. That was kind of the whole...   Jan 6 2008, 09:05 PM
Olen   The mystery deepens. This is good it feels as if ...   Jan 6 2008, 11:09 PM
The Metal Mallet   Dun dun dun. My anticipation is rising! Hope...   Jan 7 2008, 03:42 AM
jack cloudy   Here, Mallet. Let me throw some cold water on your...   Jan 7 2008, 09:26 PM
Olen   The lack of names wasn't a criticism, it works...   Jan 8 2008, 12:34 AM
Lord Revan   Oh, yeah, we all are familiar with *consultes audi...   Jan 8 2008, 01:17 AM
blockhead   Oh, yeah, we all are familiar with *consultes aud...   Jan 8 2008, 02:37 AM
Lord Revan   Woops, I meant for that last comment to be for Ole...   Jan 8 2008, 03:25 AM
jack cloudy   This is obviously a new story. Long updates, one e...   Jan 8 2008, 09:42 PM
Gaius Maximus   Nice. I've found this much better - and darker...   Jan 8 2008, 10:18 PM
Lord Revan   Arena was forty years before Oblivion, Uriel was E...   Jan 8 2008, 10:48 PM
Olen   I'm certain I know who it is now and I like :)...   Jan 8 2008, 11:39 PM
The Metal Mallet   The changes are proving to be interesting ones. K...   Jan 9 2008, 08:13 AM
Agent Griff   I've read your updates and thus far this fic s...   Jan 9 2008, 06:37 PM
jack cloudy   Chapter 2.3 The tunnel was dark, rough rock on a...   Jan 9 2008, 09:57 PM
The Metal Mallet   There are assassins in here no doubt! That...   Jan 10 2008, 07:33 AM
Olen   Assassins or traps... I always wandered about the...   Jan 10 2008, 12:38 PM
jack cloudy   I've got an idea for why it is abandoned, but ...   Jan 11 2008, 09:50 PM
Gaius Maximus   Hm... Interesting. The Mythic Dawn seems to be a l...   Jan 11 2008, 10:11 PM
Agent Griff   I just love your Altmer's personality. He all ...   Jan 11 2008, 10:46 PM
Olen   Yes I very much like the way your handling it all....   Jan 11 2008, 11:26 PM
Steve   I thought when I first saw this that it was anothe...   Jan 12 2008, 04:24 AM
jack cloudy   Oh, the mysterious backgrounds! Ok, I need to ...   Jan 13 2008, 08:22 PM
Lord Revan   Green spells are illusion, Jack, alteration is whi...   Jan 13 2008, 10:04 PM
Olen   The blades aren't really very useful. They ar...   Jan 13 2008, 10:24 PM
The Metal Mallet   Solid update. Interesting revelation about the Im...   Jan 13 2008, 11:01 PM
jack cloudy   Hah, this shows you how little I really know. :lol...   Jan 17 2008, 07:19 PM
The Metal Mallet   Damn that Altmer has some skills and still remains...   Jan 17 2008, 09:05 PM
Olen   Hmm.. emperor survives and doesn't go back to ...   Jan 17 2008, 09:57 PM
jack cloudy   Well, but the Emperor can't climb, can he? He ...   Jan 19 2008, 11:28 AM
Olen   Fascinating move into first person for the altmer....   Jan 19 2008, 12:06 PM
Agent Griff   The change of tense was interesting though I was m...   Jan 19 2008, 04:23 PM
jack cloudy   You're right, Griff. I might not have screwed ...   Jan 19 2008, 10:18 PM
Olen   Well we have a name... Yay! And a bit of back...   Jan 19 2008, 10:45 PM
Gaius Maximus   Hm... Seems like I missed some stuff. You know, ...   Jan 19 2008, 11:13 PM
canis216   Ah, I finally put in the effort to catch up, and i...   Jan 20 2008, 02:23 AM
minque   yup....just catched up on this one! Good work ...   Jan 22 2008, 12:36 AM
Agent Griff   Great last update with the re-change of tense in b...   Jan 22 2008, 08:42 AM
jack cloudy   Well, it is odd but I do it practically all the ti...   Jan 25 2008, 07:11 PM
Agent Griff   Hm, nice update. The Maormer (formerly Bosmer) is ...   Jan 25 2008, 09:33 PM
Olen   "And one last thing, keep guessing at the Alt...   Jan 26 2008, 02:20 PM
Lord Revan   I think we have the sdame suspect, but I won't...   Jan 26 2008, 06:56 PM
jack cloudy   And I think you have the right suspect. :D Chap...   Jan 27 2008, 10:15 PM
Marcel Rhodes   And there I thought he was actually Ocato for a mi...   Jan 27 2008, 11:29 PM
Gaius Maximus   Hm, interesting... I wonder what's going on wi...   Jan 27 2008, 11:47 PM
The Metal Mallet   I think I have a good idea about the Kvatch Temple...   Jan 28 2008, 04:54 AM
Olen   Good, one thing though: 'Financial report of p...   Jan 29 2008, 12:51 AM
Lord Revan   Luper is another of Jack's characters, from th...   Jan 29 2008, 02:03 AM
Agent Griff   And besides Luper we also have passing mentions of...   Jan 29 2008, 08:15 AM
jack cloudy   Ah, good job catching that, Olen. I'll edit it...   Jan 29 2008, 08:57 AM
jack cloudy   Aye, double-post! Ok, with half a month inbetw...   Feb 16 2008, 10:20 PM
Olen   Good to see more of redemption. I'm waiting f...   Feb 17 2008, 09:30 PM
Agent Griff   I like how you make subtle jabs at the AI in Obliv...   Feb 17 2008, 10:00 PM
jack cloudy   Yeah, that is weird but unfortunately something yo...   Feb 28 2008, 10:10 PM
Olen   Ok thats odd, he has contacts in the blades... Int...   Mar 2 2008, 12:06 AM
minque   Nice Jackie! Do I have to say more???? I don...   Mar 2 2008, 02:35 PM
jack cloudy   Well technically, he doesn't have contacts in ...   Mar 9 2008, 07:13 PM
Agent Griff   Great update and thoughtful insights on the way th...   Mar 9 2008, 09:08 PM
The Metal Mallet   Yea, her ignorance of the lifespan of humans is al...   Mar 10 2008, 05:38 AM
Olen   Solid update. Though you made a point - mer live ...   Mar 10 2008, 05:54 PM
Agent Griff   To even up they also have a very slow rate of bree...   Mar 10 2008, 05:59 PM
BSD-IES   This is extremely good. I haven't been on for ...   Mar 10 2008, 09:38 PM
Agent Griff   Touching on the egos of other writers isn't re...   Mar 10 2008, 09:55 PM
BSD-IES   :blink: How is that, "touching on the ego...   Mar 10 2008, 09:59 PM
Agent Griff   I did say that I agree with you. He is an excellen...   Mar 10 2008, 10:04 PM
jack cloudy   Thanks for all the praise. Anyway, I have indeed ...   Mar 15 2008, 08:24 PM
Olen   An argonian detective, thats a nce touch. And he ...   Mar 16 2008, 02:27 PM
Agent Griff   I liked the vintage detective work done by the Arg...   Mar 16 2008, 02:37 PM
treydog   Jack, your characterizations are some of the best ...   Mar 16 2008, 04:18 PM
The Metal Mallet   Do I see some more cross breeding between your sto...   Mar 17 2008, 01:41 AM
Lord Revan   The detective work was a nice touch, but I have to...   Mar 18 2008, 05:58 AM
Olen   If dunmer women normally have one child they would...   Mar 18 2008, 09:44 PM
jack cloudy   I think the best answer to that is to consider twi...   Mar 24 2008, 11:57 AM
Olen   Hmm, interesting, I don't think she's been...   Mar 24 2008, 02:27 PM
jack cloudy   Ah, she has her reasons. And for once, her reasons...   Mar 26 2008, 10:14 PM
Steve   Ooh, what a nice name. Though, I don't know if...   Mar 27 2008, 03:47 AM
jack cloudy   Funny enough, Grey's first appearance was inde...   Mar 27 2008, 10:29 PM
Lord Revan   This girl was obviously very sheltered....... It...   Mar 28 2008, 02:01 AM
Olen   Good stuff, the plot is certainly thickening. nei...   Mar 28 2008, 11:42 AM
The Metal Mallet   Yes, things are moving along nicely. You keep mak...   Mar 30 2008, 07:17 AM
jack cloudy   Now this is new. We don't skip to the Altmer t...   Apr 1 2008, 09:43 PM
jack cloudy   Yup, in case you hadn't figured it out already...   Apr 25 2008, 09:14 PM
jack cloudy   Chapter 4.7 Cyrodiil, western gate “They’re kin...   Apr 26 2008, 06:39 PM
Olen   Nice stuff. This is good, I can't wait to rea...   Apr 26 2008, 08:32 PM
The Metal Mallet   Hehe, Latta is always thinking, you'd think sh...   Apr 28 2008, 01:35 AM
jack cloudy   Chapter 4.8 Cyrodiil, prison complex. Once back...   Apr 30 2008, 09:58 PM
Olen   That last line confirms my suspicions: Angoril isn...   May 1 2008, 02:16 PM
raggidman   :lol: Was thinking Jagar Tharn - looking like it...   May 1 2008, 02:17 PM
jack cloudy   Ok, after way too long of a pause, I'm back. E...   Aug 15 2008, 09:45 PM
Steve   YES!!! The story continues! Excel...   Aug 16 2008, 10:07 PM
Remko   And then.... nothing.... :(   May 14 2010, 06:59 PM
jack cloudy   And then indeed nothing. So more than three years ...   Nov 24 2011, 10:50 PM
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