The Tale of Jonacin Options

[MerGirl]

[quote=LoneWolf]i think it's when you parry (block) with a sword. A shield blokcing the attack doesn't really allow for a swift counter, which is waht a riposte is, It's meant to catch the opponent off guard, which you can't do if you're just after blocking with a shield[/quote]

Oh, okay. Thank ya for more combat knowledge. I love battle scenes... I, myself, just can't write them very well.

[ShogunSniper]

very cool, simple, but cool, try adding some more details. Make it more realistic

[jonajosa]

Ok... here you go. That was pretty good. Keep it up.

:goodjob:

[Red]

[quote=LoneWolf]i think it's when you parry (block) with a sword. A shield blokcing the attack doesn't really allow for a swift counter, which is waht a riposte is, It's meant to catch the opponent off guard, which you can't do if you're just after blocking with a shield[/quote]

Tis true, I know because I took fencing (I quit though because everyone else was insane. Want to play Yu-gi-Oh? Want to play digimans? Want to watch the pokemon movies?).

[Fuzzy Knight]

Great writing LoneWolf.. :goodjob: Think with your combat knowledge the fight between Jonacin and Davik will be pretty good! :lickinglips:

[treydog]

Most excellent fight scenes. Hope we begin to get more of a feel for who Jonacin is... He is clearly destined for great things.

[minque]

[quote=treydog]Most excellent fight scenes. Hope we begin to get more of a feel for who Jonacin is... He is clearly destined for great things.[/quote]


I fully agree with treydog here, I love hearing about Jonacin, so keep it up. And you´re really good at fighting-scenes

[Wolfie]

Cool, the two best writers on the forums like my work

[Wolfie]

Update time
Hope you like this one

Jonacin watched as Davik called up his Shehai. While Jonacin’s was a katana, with a long, one edged blade, Davik’s was a regular, double edged longsword. Jonacin knew that this was going to be a very tough battle, especially as it was to the death and not just first contact. An instructor walked into the centre of the ring, motioning to both combatants to join him. He quickly explained the rules, to them, simply that there was to be no foul play like kicking sand into the face of the opponent, and that no aid was to be given/sought for any reason. He then told them to return to opposite sides of the ring and await his signal to begin. He retreated to just outside the ring, and brought his arms up and then down, signaling the start of the duel.

Davik sprang into action almost before the instructor’s arm had dropped, launching his attack with blistering speed. Jonacin was forced onto a desperate defence, frantically parrying the rain of blows that came towards him. He blocked a slash that would have disemboweled him, but was a split second to slow to block the reverse slash. He leapt backwards, but still felt a sudden burning sensation as Davik’s blade sliced across his chest, ripping open a shallow wound. Davik grinned, thinking that the duel was his, and pressed his attack harder.

Suddenly Jonacin ducked and span aside, slashing his sword towards Davik as he did so. He was rewarded with a grunt of pain, as his blade sliced into the muscle of Davik’s shoulder, but it didn’t cause serious damage. Jonacin grinned as he heard Davik mutter a string of curses and span to attack again. Jonacin began to taunt him, hoping to enrage him. One of the first lessons taught to those at the Hall was to always keep control of their emotions, as an enraged fighter was a stupid one. Davik roared in fury, charging towards Jonacin, his blade raised high. Jonacin’s next maneuver was very risky, but would win him the duel if he pulled it off.

As Davik charged towards him, Jonacin crouched low, waiting for his moment to strike. Davik got closer, and began swinging his blade in a downward arc that would take Jonacin’s head off. A split second before the blow connected, he ducked low, and span aside, slashing with his blade as he did so. Both fighters stopped, and turned to face each other. The entire hall was silent. Suddenly Davik let out a groan, and fell to his knees. A thin red line appeared across his chest, and suddenly blood gushed forth from the wound. Davik collapsed forward onto his face, twitched once, and died, a pool of blood spreading out from beneath his body.

Jonacin’s maneuver had worked, his blow cutting deep into Davik’s chest, cutting both lungs a severing many major veins and arteries. The move was incredibly dangerous, and required impeccable timing or it would backfire and result in the death of the one who tried it. Jonacin remained where he stood, suddenly out of breath. The wound in his chest was beginning to hurt now that adrenaline was wearing off, but Jonacin refused to seek treatment for it yet. He faced the crowd who had gathered to watch the duel, and raised his blade in the customary salute before letting it vanish.

[Chumbaniya]

The description of the fighting in your writing is really good Lonewolf. It really lets you feel the flow and pace of the fight. Nice work!

[Fuzzy Knight]

Holy compassion LoneWolf...! Your fighting scenes can almost match up to RA Salvatores, I really love how u and Salvatore goes into the nice detailed combat, even the wounds are detailed - Great writing LoneWolf, hope we can see more fights with Jonacin!

:goodjob: :goodjob: :goodjob: :goodjob:

[Wolfie]

Cool, i got compared to a professional writer

[Dantrag]

Awesome battle scene, and truly does match Salvatore's skill, though I would say that Salvatore has an extremely different style of writing his battle scenes...

[Wolfie]

I've never read any books by Salvatore.......

[gamer10]

I haven't either but my brother goes crazy over his books.

Don't bother him while he's reading them or you get the wrath of :evil13:

Anyway, yes I absolutely think the battle scene was written with great skill. Ooooh gushing blood.

[minque]

I agree with all posts above, now you are a very good writer, and getting better and better as well.....the description of the fight was great, you could easily picture it in your mind, and as always a very good usage of the language....so keep it coming Wolfie!



:goodjob: :goodjob: :goodjob: :goodjob:

[MerGirl]

Oh, so good! *claps* Oh, you really write good fighting scenes! *envy*

Um, excuse me for being dumb, but what does it mean when they 'span'? Is that another fighting term? Please don't get mad at me... :embarrassed:

[Wolfie]

You know the way you spin around? span is the past tense of spin (as in i did it earlier and now i'm telling you about it)

[Dantrag]

that would be err....spun.

[Wolfie]

depends on the context you use it in. Span is right in this situation though