Old Habits Die Hard Part Two, An old dog learns new tricks Options

[treydog]

What stands out to me about this installment? Well, let's start with the first sentence and read through to the last one. Yes, that covers it.

You very effectively describe the toll taken not just by the last fight, but all the ones before. And, with exhaustion comes craving. Athlain can identify.

The fact that the Argonian is another debt-slave was a nice touch, especially so as Julian sought to persuade rather than kill indiscriminately. If Marz is unable to solve the skooma problem, there is a certain red-haired elven princess who has had some success...

[Destri Melarg]

13.10 Hunter’s Revenge
You had me by opening with the worst part of the quest, stepping out of Fort Grief (what a great name!) just in time to see Aleron get the axe (literally). From there the battle that followed did not disappoint. In the hands of a lesser writer Julian taking down both Kurdan and his Khajiit friend so soon after her epic battle inside the Fort could have buried the needle on the uber-scale. Your handling of it not only showed Julian’s abilities, but her limitations as well.

IMHO you could simplify the sentence that SubRosa pointed out by saying something to the effect of:
A place where the ground rose nearly to the underside of the walkway caught my eye. Its arched support would provide additional cover.

Finally the axe blade shattered, leaving him with half a shaft in his two fists.

*Must . . . resist . . . Dhertee Inuu-Endo!*

13.11 Escape from Fort Grief
The return to Bravil and its unwelcome reminders, the return of the smith’s hammer that puts paid to both peace and sanity. It is no wonder that Julian’s craving would revisit itself upon her with such force. Your description of it was remarkable, and I must confess to the pride I felt in Julian that she was strong enough to resist the call. Well done to you both!

The big Orc had little else of value, so I left him with his shattered axe.

*Oh you are killing me, hautee!!!*

[mALX]

Finally the axe blade shattered, leaving him with half a shaft in his two fists.

*Must . . . resist . . . Dhertee Inuu-Endo!*

"It takes two hands to handle a whopper"

[haute ecole rider]

@Foxy: Alcoholism runs in my family, so I’ve seen the same things you have. Thanks for your validation of my little touches. I felt the addiction needs to be addressed from time to time. The Fort Grief quest was great for so many reasons, and the resurgence of the addictive cravings is just the icing on the cake.

@SubRosa: This is the largest chapter I’ve written thus far. I wanted to remind everyone that Julian found skooma after drinking failed to subdue the pain she was experiencing. Alcoholism is addiction, just legal, at least in this country at this time.

@Acadian: It made sense to me when I first wrote this quest to have a chauffeur row Julian out to Fort Grief, since there are quite a few islands in Niben Bay. It’s kind of hard to swim with sword and shield, and rather far!

@hazmick: Welcome to Old Habits Die Hard! Thanks for taking the time to read through the whole thing! I know it’s a lot of ground to cover, and I’m glad you did. The food sounds so appealing (for the most part) simply because I do my own cooking and love to experiment with flavors. So far, I haven’t made anything that tasted as bad as Maulhand’s stew!

@Olen: A nice sunny island? Sounds good! Though I think Julian would prefer one of the many islands off of the Gold Coast rather than one out in Niben Bay.

@Auggie Doggie: Does that certain red-headed princess make house (field) calls?

@Destri: I’m surprised that it was you, not Foxy, who found Dhertee Inuu-Endo! Thanks for the help on rephrasing that troublesome sentence in 13.10. At all of you who commented on Julian’s resistance to the craving, it ain’t over yet!

@mALX: LOL!

Instead of posting the next chapter, I figure it's time to close this thread and start a new one. At way over 200 posts it's getting quite long.

Old Habits Die Hard Part Three

This starts with Chapter 14. Thanks for staying with me and Julian this long! I’ve enjoyed writing this thus far, and have enjoyed all your wonderful comments and encouragement even more.

[Remko]

I don't know how many times I tried to save Aleron on my first play through hahaha. Your writing had me sitting on the tip of my seat although I damn well knew how it was going to end...

[minque]

Hautie!

Your story is brilliant, I've read it through so far, but I've decided to read the whole thing once again....at one time, just because...You know how it is...some books you can read over and over..and never get bored, instead you find new things...

Hence....the author wishes this thread to be locked.....so be it.