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> Your Writing Process, And/Or Problems with Same
haute ecole rider
post Apr 5 2020, 04:02 PM
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Now that I’m stuck at home with the lockdown, I really should stop playing ESO long enough to catch up on your Jan fic. Based on what you’ve written about your characters, it does sound like fun, and something I could share with the gay/trans folks in my life!

God knows I love sci fi, so perhaps if I approached this as a Sci Fi novel rather than a Comic Book Superhero novel I would find the motivation to read what already seems like a major project in the making!


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SubRosa
post Apr 5 2020, 08:23 PM
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I did not think I would enjoy reading a superhero novel until last year, when I read April Daniels' Nemesis duology - Dreadnought and Sovereign. I was really impressed. Because they were not stories about flying or shooting beams out of your eyes. They are stories about people.


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Acadian
post Apr 5 2020, 09:55 PM
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I prefer medieval fantasy settings but SubRosa is right. The stories I really enjoy are about people. No surprise then that I enjoyed the adventures of Teresa, then Aela, and now January. I'd give January a try. SubRosa's skill at bringing a character into your heart is superb - regardless of the venue. smile.gif


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SubRosa
post Apr 6 2020, 08:33 PM
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I pretty much finished my work up on Hungry Ghost and his daughter Hannah the teleporter

Hungry Ghost
Li Wei (Family name / First Name) is a first generation Chinese immigrant. He is 40 years old, and came to America in the 80s with his parents as a child, having been smuggled in by Snakeheads. They lived in San Francisco, and he joined the Wah Ching street gang as a young teen. When he was 20 years old he met Alice Brown a young Australian-born computer nerd who was then working at a tech support call center in San Fran. He fell in love, and they had a daughter, Hannah, together. He quit the gang, and vowed to go legit for his new family.

His metahuman powers manifested soon after. He found that he could not get a job because of his past. Then Hannah, only 2, came down with bacterial meningitis. She was hospitalized and quarantined. Neither Wei or Alice had health insurance of course. So Wei went out on the streets, and made a deal with the Triads. He was back in, and they paid for Hannah's treatments, even having her airlifted to Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore for treatment.

He spent the next decade (2000 - 2010) paying off his debt to the Triads. In that time he worked for them as a thief, a spy, a saboteur, a bodyguard, and in general a counter to Black Hats of rival organizations, and White Hats and government metas. During this time he traveled all over the Pacific Rim. During this time Alice left him (they were never actually married), because of his ties to organized crime. She did not want him seeing their daughter, for fear of him enticing her into the same life. He refused at first, but in 2008 a yakuza hitman nearly killed Alice and Hannah in an effort to get to Wei, he agreed to cut his ties with them for their safety. But he still kept tabs on them through private detectives, whom he paid to keep them safe.

In 2010 he left the Triad and went completely solo. However, he still retained his connections with them, and sometimes still did work for them as an independent contractor. He spent most of his time in the west coast of North America and Latin America. But he still sometimes did jobs across the Pacific as well, in Hong Kong, Thailand, Vietnam, South Korea, and Japan.


All I really need to do is figure out his costume (I hate using that word). He does not really need armor most of the time. But he might wear it for times when he is not prepared to take a hit. I don't see him wearing anything flashy. It might be something as simple as a your basic black tactical gear with lots of pockets for gizmos, a place to store his staff when it is collapsed, and a baklava to hide his features.



Hannah Brown

Hannah is a meta with the ability to sense into higher physical dimensions, and to a certain extent control them. By manipulating higher spatial dimensions she can teleport herself. When she does, it makes a bright flash of light, and onlookers can see reality warping around her. Then the air rushes in where she was once standing, creating a great wind that blows things around. When she appears it is the same in reverse. People see reality warping, then there is a flash of light, and a burst of air that she displaces when she appears. At first she can only teleport as far as she can see, or to a place she knows. Later she will be able to sense through the higher dimensions over a distance, and use that to teleport to any place she can project her senses.

She also possessed telekenesis, as she can manipulate the higher physical dimensions to cast shadows down into the lower ones. By manipulating these shadows, she can move objects, or create patterns of force (repulsion or attraction). She starts creating force fields and moving objects from a distance. This moves up to flight, and larger force fields. As she improves her ability to sense dimensions, she will be able to teleport to unknown places, by sensing along the space-time continuum into those areas.

Since her powers awakened, she sees the world as geometry, lines and angles and degrees. When her powers first awakened, she could not control them. She blew out a window by accident, and the next day blasted a hole through her bedroom wall. This prompted her to run away from home. She was afraid she would hurt her mother, or herself, or just anyone she came across. She saw Stormcrow all over social media, and imagined that if anyone could help her, she would be it. So she made her way to Detroit through a combination of bus rides, hitchhiking and teleporting. She continued to stay in touch with her mother with her phone, to let her know she was safe.

Her father is Hungry Ghost aka Li Wei. Her mother is an Australian emigre to America, named Alice Brown, who lives in San Francisco. At the time of Hannah's birth in 2000, Alice was working at a tech support call center. Currently she is a software engineer writing phone Apps.

When Hannah was 2 years old she came down with bacterial meningitis. She was hospitalized and quarantined. Neither Wei or Alice had health insurance of course. So Wei went out on the streets, and made a deal with the Triads. He was back in, and they paid for Hannah's treatments, even having her airlifted to Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore for treatment. She recovered, and remembers almost nothing of the experience. Just vague snatches of being alone in a hospital room.

By the time Hannah was 5 her mother had left her father (they were never married). She recalls them constantly arguing, especially whenever Wei tried to see her.

When Hannah was 8 a yakuza hitman came after her and her mother in an effort to flush her father out into the open. As it turns out, Wei was in Hong Kong at the time. The hitman took them hostage, and was only stopped by Thunderbolt and Riven, who captured the hitman and rescued the pair without harm. Hannah only saw her father once afterward, when he told her that to keep her safe, he was going away. She has not seen or heard from him since.

I have pics of Hannah. I hemmed and hawed over what ethnicity she would be until I saw Hannah Quinlivan in the movie Skyscraper. I instantly knew that was who I was looking for.

Hannah

Hannah



Hannah will eventually need a supername. She won't have a costume per se to start with. I kind of see her simply wrapping a scarf around her mouth and nose to start with. Though Gadget might eventually make her a suit of hagfish armor.


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Acadian
post Apr 6 2020, 09:53 PM
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Very cool! I look forward to meeting these new joins to the StormFiction. smile.gif


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SubRosa
post Apr 8 2020, 10:04 PM
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I think Hannah's eventual Supername will be Locus. It is wonderfully mathematical, suiting both her teleporting and telekinesis. It also sounds better than Kaluza-Klein or Calabi–Yau Manifold. Though something like M-Theory would be interesting, if I could spin the term into something more interesting. Come to think of it, Singularity might be a good name too, though she does not control gravity, so maybe not.


And her Dad is Hu Bing. He looks handsome enough to have sired a goddess like Hannah Quinlivan.


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Darkness Eternal
post Apr 9 2020, 12:17 AM
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They sound awesome Subrosa! I'm very impressed in how much work you put in the Stormcrow! Can't wait to meet them!


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The grass below—above the vaulted sky.”
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SubRosa
post Apr 15 2020, 02:39 AM
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I just made an interesting observation. I am watching an old episode of The Undersea World Jaques Cousteau, about Truk Lagoon. For those who do not know, it was a major Japanese naval base in the Pacific during WW2. A bunch of ships were sunk there by the Enterprise and other American carriers. The rusted out hulks of those old ships remain. Many in such low water that most of them are still above the water.

The first thing I thought when looking at them, is what a waste. While rusted, those ships are still perfectly good iron. They could be melted down and the iron put right back into use. Iron is 100% recyclable. In fact, it takes less energy to recycle old iron and steel than it does to produce new metal.

So what does this have to do with anything? In Chapter 5 of the Stormcrow stories we are going to meet a supervillain who can manipulate iron and steel. Both reshaping it, and moving it telekinetically through the air. Instead of deciding to go around trying to murder people, he could have gone into business recycling scrap iron like those ships. He could have easily and safely cleaned up wrecks and just plain garbage like this, contributed to heavy industry, gotten rich, and made the world a better place all at the same time.

It just struck me as a great way that a person could use super powers in the real world, without becoming a costumed warrior.


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haute ecole rider
post Apr 15 2020, 05:39 PM
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And yet those old hulks provide new habitat for marine life . . .

Just tossing that up in the air for you to consider - many of these things are providing the scaffolding for new coral reefs, as well as hiding places for many species of fish and other marine life.


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SubRosa
post Apr 15 2020, 07:33 PM
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QUOTE(haute ecole rider @ Apr 15 2020, 12:39 PM) *

And yet those old hulks provide new habitat for marine life . . .

Just tossing that up in the air for you to consider - many of these things are providing the scaffolding for new coral reefs, as well as hiding places for many species of fish and other marine life.

I agree about the sunken ships. Ships have even been deliberately sunk in order to create artificial reefs and spur the regeneration of the ocean, which I am all for.

But these ones I am talking about were sitting above water. So all they were doing was rusting. It's like these ship graveyards, where old wrecks are just left to rot forever on the shore


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haute ecole rider
post Apr 16 2020, 02:40 PM
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Of course! In that case it would be reasonable to either a) recycle them for the iron/steel, or cool.gif drag them out into deeper water (assuming they’ll hold together long enough) at high tide and sink them to make reefs. The decision your character makes would be revealing of his moral compass . . . And I wonder, should he choose to salvage, how long before he decides submerged wrecks are fair game, marine habitats be damned?


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SubRosa
post Apr 29 2020, 04:35 AM
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QUOTE(haute ecole rider @ Apr 5 2020, 11:02 AM) *

Now that I’m stuck at home with the lockdown, I really should stop playing ESO long enough to catch up on your Jan fic. Based on what you’ve written about your characters, it does sound like fun, and something I could share with the gay/trans folks in my life!

God knows I love sci fi, so perhaps if I approached this as a Sci Fi novel rather than a Comic Book Superhero novel I would find the motivation to read what already seems like a major project in the making!

Something I keep forgetting to add is that the Stormcrow fic is very heavily focused on magic. It is almost an Urban Fantasy. Except for the superheros. The protagonist January gets her powers from magic. She created her powers through the force of her will in fact. Her mentor is likewise a magician. The Big Bads in the overarching storyline are magicians. The Okami character we were just brainstorming on is a magic user as well.

Because it is set in the real world - sort of - I was able to pull a lot of magical theory from real traditions as well. Things like the Law of Contagion and Law of Similarity. Or books like the Grand Grimoire. January's mentor refers to magical energy from the Greek's term aion. Being a gamer, Jan calls it mana of course. Monsters from RL folklore like the djieien recently featured (and in time a raven mocker), make appearances.

It has been nice to dig into real life magical stuff like this and put it to direct use.


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SubRosa
post May 8 2020, 02:24 AM
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As I mentioned in the Stormcrow thread, I am going to change her friend Jack's name. The reason is that her great-grandfather Jack Parsons keeps coming up in conversations with Blood Raven. I don't want people to get confused about which Jack is which.

I think I am going to change it to Jacob Schwarz. He is modeled on Jack Black, and I'd like to stay true to that.

Nicknames are popular with the Knights of Nerddom. So he may or may not have one. If he does, it would be something sci-fi or fantasy related. Like Russell is 'Rus' based on the yell from the King Arthur movie from the 2004 or so. And Kelly is Kell, based on the Kell Hounds from Battletech.

All I can think of so far is Jacob's Ladder (maybe JL for short, or Ladder). Jake the Snake is just too obvious. The bullies in school probably called him Jake the Flake.


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treydog
post May 8 2020, 11:25 AM
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The "use name" could also be some variation of- "J" plus another letter or a "descriptor". The descriptor would be determined by something specific to him or his Knights persona....
For e.g.- if he is named for his father and grandfather, he could be "J Cubed".

Or you could turn it on its head, ala the Raymond J. Johnson, Junior beer commercial, with the "J" part of his name coming second.


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SubRosa
post May 8 2020, 04:52 PM
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Yeah, I have been thinking of scrapping the Jacob, and maybe starting with a nickname and working back from there. He's a class clown, comic, musician - like Jack Black. And he is Jewish, though not very religious, also like Jack Black. So something related to that would be appropriate. Or just something sci-fi themed. Like maybe Dunk, short for the dragon Dunkelzahn from Shadowrun. Or Driz, short for Drizzt D'ourden. Or Danger Ranger.

I do like J-Cubed though.

Or maybe Jack-Mack, or Jack Master of the Universe.

Or maybe Blackjack. After the Decepticon. Or Jacktimus Prime. Maybe both.


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Kazaera
post May 9 2020, 11:51 AM
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In case it helps, "Dunkel" literally means "dark", so "Dunk" would be another allusion to Jack Black. Although of course Blackjack would be a more obvious one!

It's interesting to see you consider changing things you've already written! I'm wrestling with something a little similar right now...

Usually, I strictly forbid myself from going back to change things. For one, writing SitC sometimes feels a little like holding a snake by its tail - I always have a very clear outline of the rest of the story all the way to Dagoth Ur as I write (seriously, you should see my plotting notes), but what that outline actually is has changed and continues to change dramatically over time. If I don't treat everything already posted as fixed, complete chaos will result. For another, the early chapters include material I wrote as a teenager, and if I started editing those it'd end in a complete rewrite and you probably wouldn't see a new chapter for a few years.

At the same time, two things have been bugging me for *ages* and I keep wondering whether I shouldn't make an exception:

- Adryn having lived in Solitude in Skyrim. I actually included that little tidbit before Skyrim even came out, when basically all we knew was that it was the capital of Skyrim and the northernmost city in Tamriel. But every time I play the game, I realise Windhelm would actually be a much better fit for what I was imagining - brutally cold, unforgiving, extremely Nordic. For bonus points, there'd be a lot of irony in having her grow up in the city that was the capital of Skyrim when it ruled Morrowind and that's later at the heart of the Stormcloak Rebellion and has the Grey Quarter, and ESO!Windhelm contains an Outlaw's Refuge that would make a brilliant headquarters for Adryn's Thieves' Guild. (I have been scratching my head over where to put them in Solitude.) The main issue is that as one of the closest Skyrim cities to Morrowind, it would probably have had a decent Dunmer population even pre-Red Year and so it's hard to see how Adryn would have remained so ignorant of Dunmer customs, but I can probably explain that away.

- her age. So Adryn started taking shape in my head not long after I first started playing Morrowind when I was sixteen or so, and I remember how I thought I would be cool and adult and make my classic teenage hero be *gasp* nineteen. So old! So mature! ...you can imagine how this feels looking back almost twenty years later. There are some fixed points in her history (the Warp in the West, in particular) that make it hard to shift this too much, but I think I might be able to fit in two years. IDK, from the vantage of my mid-thirties Adryn being twenty-one seems much more palatable to me than nineteen, especially because the latter results in her doing some things at fifteen or sixteen in her backstory that are... fairly unlikely.

I keep going back and forth on these because I *could* keep these things as they are, but I know that if I were starting to write this story now I'd choose differently. Especially on Windhelm vs Solitude.


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treydog
post May 9 2020, 02:42 PM
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I can certainly identify with the way the story changes over the course of writing. (I just looked back at the first BotM post... 2007!!!) There are huge inconsistencies from those early days to the end- most especially Athynae's role and personality.

Anyway- I DO think you could retcon Solitude to Windhelm without much damage being done. As to the "why is Adryn so unfamiliar with Dunmer traditions and language and etc.?".... much of that would have to do with the Nordish (and possibly Cyrodiilic?) prejudice. I rather think of it like the horrible forced assimilation of Native Americans in the U.S. and Canada. As a Dunmer child, Adryn was taught to be "man instead of mer." Using her original language would be cause for punishment; doing anything "Dunmer" = the same.

Her age could certainly be moved by several years, especially as she now (may be) on the track of her ancestry. Again, given the whole "who really cares about the exact details- she's just another orphan elf" attitude- her "official" age (in orphanage records) could easily be wrong.


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haute ecole rider
post May 9 2020, 06:32 PM
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I do think you can make Adryn older in terms of years and still keep her "young" in development, as she is Dark Elf and therefore ages slower (not as slow as High Elves, but still)

I have my Alise pegged at 147 years of age (don't know why, that's what she said she is) and developmentally she's close to a human in her 40's. So I'm hoping that helps you with your conundrum.

And I'm with Trey - it should be pretty easy to replace "Solitude" with "Windhelm" if that makes more sense. And of course, there are two or three generations of Native Americans who know little of their ancestral culture thanks to the mission schools of 100 years ago, so that can be used as an example of why Adryn knows so little of her own Dunmer culture.


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Kazaera
post May 9 2020, 07:26 PM
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Thanks, you two! And oh wow, I forgot you started BitM in 2007, Trey! Congratulations again on finishing, and now I feel a little more hope for one day getting Adryn where I want her to go... but yeah, small wonder if some characters changed during that! Luckily Adryn's personality hasn't changed much since the very early days, I mainly have to deal with new characters insistently making their way on the scene. Both Ervesa and Methal got added fairly spontaneously and immediately made themselves hugely important with major plot impact; in fact, I'm not 100% sure Jamie was in my very early plots either.

Re: unfamiliarity - it's definitely the case that Adryn got basically zero Dunmer traditions during her childhood. That was in Daggerfall, which was not a great place to be a small Dunmer child because the most famous Dunmer in High Rock was Barenziah, Queen of Wayrest... aka Daggerfall's big rival. This combined with very few Dunmer in general led to anti-Dunmer sentiment in the general populace for a while there. I'm not sure the mission schools are a perfect analogy since nobody deliberately took Adryn away from her people, but the effect was definitely similar.

(Adryn's childhood is a little convoluted - ??? to Daggerfall village to Daggerfall orphanage to Markarth to Solitude/Windhelm. I'd feel a little bad about this except that I'd moved across the Atlantic three times by the time I was twelve and have always wanted to convey the experience of "so I need diagrams to explain my childhood".)

What gets trickier is that she has apparently not learned such simple things such as that Dunmer prefer being called "Dunmer" to "Dark Elf", the existence of Ashlanders or the super basic basics of Dunmer religion by the time the story starts, which is harder to justify if she's spent time in a place with a decent amount of them. But I can probably justify that - for one, there aren't necessarily *that* many Dunmer in Windhelm, for another, Adryn might not be hanging out with them anyway as she's deep into the Thieves' Guild lifestyle by then. And it would only take a single encounter with, say, an unfriendly Dunmer trader who has no time for "outlanders" for her to give up on approaching any.

OK, sold. I do have to do a bit more than find + replace "Solitude" to "Windhelm", but it's still manageable.

Re: ages...

The idea of taking refuge in Elvish aging is an excellent one, but I need Adryn to have still been a pre-adolescent when the Warp in the West hit, which was ten years pre-canon. (Because reasons.) Since she's clearly a young adult now, I can't really slow her aging any. I also have her "losing" two years in the Dragon Break, which is both a foundational trauma of hers and an obfuscation of her personal timeline that is going to become important later, so in actual aging terms we're talking eight years. Currently I have her eleven, as said, making her nineteen when canon starts. I can probably push that to thirteen, and/or cut down the time loss in the Dragon Break to a year and a half.

In theory, I could mess around with the timeline, but when it's already so close to what I need it feels like cheating. Also, doing that has knock-on effects on other character ages, and let's just say that it's possible some of the Daggerfall crew will make reappearances one day. And some of them might even have had a normal linear experience of time! whistling.gif

It does mean that my Dunmer apparently age completely normally up until their mid-twenties or so, then go into slow motion for a few centuries, which is... weird. At some point I'm going to have to sit down and actually figure out Dunmer lifespans and aging patterns. (Divayth Fyr is an outlier and will not be counted.)


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SubRosa
post May 9 2020, 08:47 PM
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I am the last person to say you should not go back and make changes. Most books you look at will have a list of acknowledgements, with the author thanking their family and friends for feedback, which they used to change the story before it went to print. Being posted here on Chorrol is like that. It has not gone to print yet.

And even after books are printed, authors sometimes go back and tweak thing in new editions. Mary Shelly did that with Frankenstein, precisely for the reasons you mentioned. She was 19 when she originally wrote it. But when she was in her 30s she was a little older, little wiser, and a little more worldly. So she went back and tweaked things a bit for a new edition.

So by all means change Solitiude to Windhelm. It really does not change the plot. It is kind of like saying "Adryn ate a pear" rather than "Adryn ate an apple." to be honest.

Likewise, making her a few years older is nothing Nirn-shattering. It is not going to change the story in any way. If it feels right, then do it.

One other way of explaining Adryn's lack of understand of her race's culture is an idea I used for my Altmer barbarian from Skyrim years back. I think she was named Hera. Her history was that her parents died when she was a child. She was found and raised by a Nord mountain man. Think Mad Jack from Grizzy Adams. Or Grizzly Adams. Yes, I totally ripped of Heidi. It was not until she became an adult that she left her home in the wilds to discover civilization. She knew nothing of her Altmer heritage. Only the bits of Nord culture that Mad Jack passed down to her.


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