[X] My Assistant

[DoomedOne]

I figure everybody gets ideas on what they would try to implement if they got to be the big main dude. Balances of Power aside, what main laws and projects would you implement or at least try to implement.

If I were President, I'd be elected on Friday, assassinated on Saturday, buried on Sunday. Couldn't resist. Anyway, firstly I hate my country's budget. I would make our military budget 1/10th what it is currently and focus most of that money on improving technology and training making instead of recruitment, keeping our aircraft carriers running on securing oil fields. I would put more money into education and being resubsidizing college to help expand the middle class in this country. I would spend a ton of money on technology development to help reduce green gas emission. I would cut the FBI budget in half, and cut the CIA and NSA out of the picture. Furthermore, because global warming will be in full swing populaces around the globe will need to be relocated constantly. A lot of money will have to go into that. It's okay though, if the military budget was cut we'd have the money. Also, public transportation would get a lot of money, too.

I would completely reformat our foreign policy so we have to respect sovereignty. Everything about Foreign Policy will change, especially how we trade with people. I would put a trade embargo on all nations that did not have living-wage laws. I would up our own minimum wage ot a living one. I would invest in study abroad programs because the best way to end racial/regional ignorance (which feeds support of wars in foreign countries) is to justg force people to deal with all types of people all the time.

90% of all undeveloped land would be declared untouchable national forests. Polution laws would go into effect far sgtricter than any we've seen before, pesticides would become illegal as well as synthetic nitrogen and other environmentally damaging addatives. Subsidies would be given to companies that implemented environmentally friendly technology and sold environmentally friendly products. Magnet trains and electric buses would slowly replace cars, etc...

NAFTA would be completely disbanded and rewritten in corrodination with the workers and environmental activists this time around. And if I really could, I'd disband company farms and help family farms replace them.

[Agent Griff]

If I'd be the president of my own country, it would do several things typical of Romanian leaders. Almost every Romanian leader out there is trying to make as much money as he can, as fast as possible, before their term ends. This can be done in a great number of ways. Anyway, this is my shortlist.

1) Since Romania is an ex-Soviet country, we have the CNSAS. It's a society which has acces to the secret files of the former Secret Police. These files have a plethora of information about Romanian politicians and how they spied on their fellow Romanians for the Secret Police. I would use files from the CNSAS to blackmail my political rivals. I would also use the Romanian Justice system to attack my political rivals, since every politician in Romania has done something illegal in the past.

2) I would sell former factories to foreign investors for very small prices and keep a lot of money for myself. This is a highly popular way of earning money in Romania. You get to keep most of the money for yourself, and the workers who used to work at the factory are ussually fired by the new investors. Not everybody wins but you come on top and that's what matters!

3) I would legalize prostitution to a certain extent so Romania can get rid of the road-side hookers who wave at you from the side of the road at night. There's a high risk to get infected with Aids while doing that kind of stuff. Better to have it legalized and taking place in a clean brothel. And if it's legalized, then perhaps I could find a way to make illegal money out of it!

4) I would radically restructure the Romanian police, since more than 50% of Romanian policemen have desk jobs. I find that unnaceptable. I would also equip most policemen with adequate firearms, not 10-year old pop-guns from the Soviet Era. There would also be strict training programs to enforce discipline.

5) I would radically update the Constitution since we have the same Constitution from the year 1883, with little added updates. A lot of words are archaic and hard to understand for the general populace of Romania.

That's a general shortlist. You might say that my way of doing things is very corrupt but that's how things are done in Romania. It's been like this since the fall of Communism in 1989, when the guy who led a rebellion against our Communist leader, himself a well-known member of the Communist Party, took over power and made Romania a "democracy". My country is really f****d up and I can't wait to leave it.

[Ibis]

If I were Madame President, everyone would walk, bicycle or ride motorcycles EVERYWHERE. Mom's with babes & children could have covered sidecars or trikes. There would be buses, semi-trucks & most all transporting of goods would be done on raillcars. Any cars allowed would be no bigger than fiats or VW bugs or mini-coopers. The exception would be govt. carpool vehicles .. which would be like Arnold's greened-out hummer.
No nuclear energy = Philadelphia's model of encouraging customers to install wind and solar energy and then the power company buying back their excess energy and distributing it locally would be followed. Also in coastal and lake states - tidal and wave energy would be used.
No pesticides exceopt approved natural remedies would be allowed. ABSOLUTELY no lawn fertilizer of any kind so our lakes can recover from runoff. People would be encouraged to have lawns either natural to their own area, or zen rock sand gardens or rock gardens. Recycling waterfalls and speculation pools could also irrigate one's own property.
All babies and children would be FULL citizens, not slaves or property of their parents until age 18. They could file lawsuits if mistreated by anyone ... parent, teacher, neighbor, bully, etc. Jerry Springer would be Prime Minister since he did so well as Mayor of Cinncinnati and sorting people out on TV. His enforcer Steve would be Secretary of Defense. Arnold Swarzenegger would be Vice President, Hillary would be Secretary of State and Bruce Springstien would be Labor Union National Administrator. There would be National Health Care for All and deportation to India, China, Africa, S. America to any who don't want to work ... that is our national welfare policy. Our chief foriegn policy would be to unite the whole worlds efforts into reaching Mars, Saturn, Ios and then beyond Galaxy. No real estate off=Earth could be individually owned - it would be declared its own space and especially our Moon would be ecologically protected.
All Earthly and galactic wildlife would be protected. As would crops and vegetation. All birds will be respected as if on the Endangered List. Vegetation and animals native to one region, will not be transplanted to another region due to unbalancing nature.
AAALLL US corporations would be forced to return to and operate and hire American and pay taxes ON American soil or they will blacklisted from selling in and entering the United States. However free travel will go on between the North and South Americas. Our borders will be guarded enforce with every technology available. Any illegal who commits a crime, even traffic infraction, will have their whole family deported with them back to their homeland immediately and without a costly trial. Our jails will become total rehabilitation centers: our mental hospitals will become training grounds for jobs like janitor, kiosk clerk, dishwasher, etc. Any US soldier who is permanently injured either wartime or peactime will have his/her entire nuclear family supported for life.
People will be encouraged to worship God on the Sabbath ... but totally free to follow their own religion, as long as it is not a harmful one. The constitution and all it embodies will be upheld. Customer rights will be heavily stressed over corporate interests. There will be a tank on every corner enforcing these laws and traffic light cameras watching you'alls every move.
Oh right ... Angelina Jolie will be Peace Ambassadress and Keanu Reeves will be my Personal Secretary.