A New Sun Rises - Maxical's Adventures, The Truth Behind The Oblivion Crisis Options

[D.Foxy]

OH MY GAWWWWWWWWD.....






Only Maxical....ONLY MALXICAL....

You've outDONE yourself!!! ONLY MALXICAL could FART her way into trouble!!!!

[Acadian]

Oh my goodness, this was well worth the long wait, my friend!

A delight how you worked some familiar game pieces into this episode. Specifically, the appearance of the 'tutorial crew' of Renault, Baurus and Glenroy. Also using that old burned out 'All Things Alchemical' shop which is in the exact location you described in game. Brilliant!

'I heard it‘s said, ‘if you ain‘t seen it in the Bloodworks, it don‘t exist‘. Boy were they ever right! A naked white cat…”
Based on what Maxical has taught us in the past, this was no surprise!

“How dare you! If I wasn’t a lady I would spit…wait, I’m no lady! I’m a beast, and can’t be responsible for my actions! REEEEEEOOOOW! HIIIISSSSSS! PATOOOEY!”
Hilarious!

As Maxical insisted in overscrubbing the sewar from herself, I couldn't help but be reminded she is a cat. Well done!

'Humiliation drove the color to my cheeks. “I’d like a bath…and I’m starving.”
“You’re a prisoner, not a princess. Do you know the difference?” Falanu turned and pointed me to a large pot on the woodstove. “Get something to eat, then be ready to get down to work. You’re not here on vacation, you know.” Her hands seemed to fall naturally to her hips, as if she was used to being in charge.'
Your dialogue clarification tags here were stunningly good!

'I suddenly wanted to go home…to Alix and S’Jirra.'
Aww. Kind of like the poignant line that Grits quoted, this - inserted in the midst of tragedy, chaos and humor - was such a delight!

Maxical simply blew me away at the end. Seems like she sort of blew away 'All Things Alcemical' as well. Despite the fact that you have left us with a cliffie, I could not stop laughing here. If worse comes to worse, I'm sure Maxical can muster another explosion to simply blow the doors off the place to escape.

[Athynae]

WOW!!!! It doesn't get much better than that! Humor with just a touch of heart, classic Max. It was well worth the wait but please don't torture us with another extended waiting period for the next installment. I was beginning to think I was going to have to find an MA meeting close by or something, tequila wasn't helping at all.

[Zalphon]

"You're a prisoner, not a princess" Now how many times have parents said that to their grounded daughters... I like the line

[mALX]

@ King Coin - She almost was, maybe arson will get her there! ROFL !! YOU CALLED IT !!! ROFL !!! To be honest, I had the refuge camp set up at the northern end of the City Isle till I played the game the day before writing this chapter. I happened past the ruin of the old "All Things Alchemical" and the possibility that Maxical had caused that somehow crossed my mind, lol. Just wasn't sure how it was going to happen, but knew she caused it, lol.

Thank you so very much, KC !!! You ROCK !!! And it is so great to have you back, you were missed !!!

***
@ Arcry - First off, HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!! Thank you so much Arcry !! It is so great to see you still reading Maxical, that means a lot to me, Thank You !!!

***
@ Grits - Thank you so much Grits !!! I happened across a YouTube vid of a walk through the tutorial dungeon - seeing it when you aren't playing it yourself, I was really struck by the personalities of Renault and Glenroy. I foresee a "not so happy" reunion when Maxical finally starts the main questline and meets up with them in that jail cell, ROFL !!!

EW! Yeah, I thought the same thing about Falanu's "secret ingredient." Her shop is conveniently located very close to Seridur's cave, and he has been tossing bodies (conveniently drained of blood) in the water in front of Memorial Cave ... GAAAAH! Urg!

Thank you so very much, Grits !!! I really appreciate your insights into each chapter, lets me know if I've gotten across what I was hoping to!! You ROCK !!!

***
@ Foxy - That one was for you, lol. As soon as I knew Maxical had to be the one to destroy that shop, the first thing I thought of was "The Mission" when we were still in the planning stages of it. You had mentioned Maxical farting and we ended up mellowing it down to a loud stomach rumble - so here is the fart you wanted, ROFL !!! (Much better than having her torch Foxy's suite of rooms, ROFL !!! Thank you so much, Foxy - it was Awesome to see you stop by again !!! WOO HOO !!!

***
@ Acadian - Thank you so very much Acadian !!! (and for pushing me into writing more on the story too, lol). My cats were fighting all over my front porch, and I noticed they gave a "reeeeooow" and a few hisses before they spat - then tangled with each other. I was laughing thinking of Maxical doing that - and it stuck.

The cleaning was also inspired by my outdoor cats. They are genius at cleaning themselves! Possom sometimes hides out beneath the neighbors car and comes home with black grease on his fur - in hours he will groom himself till it is gone - can't imagine how he does that !!

Maxical simply blew me away at the end. Seems like she sort of blew away 'All Things Alcemical' as well.

ROFL !! Thank you so much for your kind words, Acadian !!! And for continueing to push and inspire me!!! You ROCK !!!

***
@ Athynae - ROFL !!! (MA meetings - hilarious ... and thank you!) It tickles me that you came and read Maxical, and that you liked the story!! Thank you so much, Athynae !!!

***
@ Zalphon - Thank you so much, Zalphon !!! Oh yeah, I see that being said, ROFL !!!

This post has been edited by mALX: Jun 24 2011, 04:09 PM

[mALX]

*


Chapter 112: Escaping the Fire



Falanu’s raging bellow sounded through the locked door like a death knell. A trail of flames had spread across the floor from the vial I’d thrown, licking up the legs of her work tables and beginning to spread across the top towards the rows of concoctions in bottles up there. Would they explode like the one I had thrown did? Dear gods!

Instinct drove my feet hurrying through the hissing balls of flames that were now sparking off the expensive wall hangings and landing perilously close to the rows of vials filled with concoctions that lined the four tables in the center of the room.

I nearly singed my tail as I darted across to the steps leading up to her private quarters. There was no time to stop and admire the lavish furnishings of her bedroom as I shot across to the dormered window and struggled to open the sash, but I can’t say I didn’t notice with envy the luxury of everything. She must be as rich as Fathis! Was everyone from Morrowind wealthy? Would she expect me to save some of her exquisite items?

As I glanced around quickly to see if there was anything within grabbing distance, that’s when I heard the sound…a kind of shrieking, not Falanu this time. It was emanating from the thick folds of velvet covering her bed, did she have a pet? I’d best save it, she may not care about her extravagant lifestyle...but if a beloved pet was killed...

There was nothing there when I pulled back the luxurious weighty throw, naught but the biggest fluffiest feather pillows I’d ever seen in my life…good gods, the woman lived like Caula Voria…maybe better!

“Here pet, come quickly so you don’t burn…” I called but no pet emerged. A quick tousling of the soft lacy sheets revealed naught, but on turning from the bed my eye was caught by a glass covered stand filled with the most delicious looking sweetrolls I‘d ever seen…they must be imported from Morrowind. Sitting on top of the glass was a young mouse, tiny compared to the rats I was used to seeing around the Bloodworks.

“Are you Falanu’s pet? Come with me quickly and I’ll bring you to her…” I reached my hand out to it.

The mouse made a chattering sound, shaking its head as if to say no. He appeared to be pointing at the sweetrolls.

“There’s no time…well…” I pulled one of the pillowcases off quickly and began filling it with the sweetrolls, shoving one quickly in my mouth to chew while I did. I had never tasted the like of it, ambrosia…like no other sweetroll I’d ever eaten before.






***


When the last roll was in the pillowcasing, I held it open and the little mouse readily jumped in. I yanked a section of heavy ornate roping down from one drape and tied the little mouse inside the pillowcase, then hurried to the window and climbed out onto the sloping roof.

“FAWAU, ELPH!” I shouted around the sweetroll in my mouth. Her expression looked like she may combust at any second as her face appeared below me.

“I’LL KILL YOU FOR THIS YOU [CENSORED] [CENSORED] CAT!“ The tone of her voice gave promise to her words.

“Ih wa an ashident! Er…I shaved your phet, he’sh ri ere!” A hunk of sweetroll flew from my mouth, gobbing on her forehead.

“My special sweetrolls! THIEF!“ She began shouting.

Using the rope, I quickly lowered the sack with the mouse and sweetrolls down to Falanu.

“What’s this!” She demanded, yanking the rope off and opening the pillowcase. Her shriek was the last sound she made other than an involuntary grunting gasp when I inadvertently fell ontop her as I leaped from the roof.

Falanu had fainted. She lay sprawled on her back underneath me among a (now crushed) bed of her precious ingredients. I hadn’t meant to land on her, only near her…but at the last second had seen the sack with the mouse and knew I would crush the little fellow if I fell on him. Changing directions mid-air had not been easy, and there she lay spread out to break my fall like a comfortable mattress to land on.

The sack lay open on the ground, the mouse was sitting up in the gaping mouth of it gnawing on an overly large piece of sweetroll. He made a chuckling sound as I heaved myself off the prostrate Falanu.

“We’ve got to get out of here before this place blows, little guy.” I closed the sack back around him and tied it with the rope, knotting it around my waist.

By grabbing her ankles I was able to pull Falanu’s limp body through the organized rows of plants, although trampling a good portion of them. It made no sense to walk carefully on the paths between them when her life may be in danger. Why had she screamed and fainted that way?






***


Her dress was pulled up well over her head by the time I reached the waters edge with her. I cupped my hands to scoop water into Falanu’s face in an attempt to wake her. She began to stir as the second handful of icy water doused her head.

“Wha…what’s going on? Where am I?”

My face must have swam into her vision then, because her expression changed instantly from woozy to acute hatred.

“YOU! You’ll die for…HEY! What is my dress doing over my head? Why are there long scratches on my butt?” Falanu eyed my claws that were unsheathed from tension. WHAT THE [CENSORED] HAVE YOU BEEN DOING TO ME! GUARDS!”

“Nothing…NO! Honest! I saved your life, and rescued your pet!”

Falanu struggled to sit up, casting healing on herself. “Saved me! My [censored] you did! You burned my house down to escape and robbed me! And only the gods know what you’ve been doing to me while I was passed out! Rescued my pet? Is that some euphemism for my privates? You disgusting pervert!”

“HUH? NO! Dear gods! How was I to know you wore no panties? Your dress came up when I was pulling you through your plant stems…”

“You dragged me…MY PLANTS! What else have you done to me, you vile…”


“KABOOM! BOOM! KABOOM! BABOOOM! POW! WHOOSH!”


“GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!” Falanu’s shriek lasted almost as long as the explosions that rocked what was left of her shop into a fiery inferno that lit up the sky like daylight. Half of the shop disintegrated in the blast, the other half was consumed instantly by the roaring flames.

“YOU’RE FIRED! And now that you don’t work for me, I’m going to KILL YOU!”

“But I saved your life…your…GAAAAH!” As I ran from Falanu, I tore at the rope tying the bag to my waist. “Here, I saved your mouse!” I scooped the mouse from the sack and tossed it at Falanu.

“SHRIIIIIEEEEEEK!” Falanu’s dark skin turned a deathly pale, and before she passed out I could see the terror in her eyes as she clawed at her chest to get the mouse off her.

How odd, that she could sleep with that mouse in her bed and yet be so terrified of it! Had she not known it was there? I scooped the mouse up from where it nestled between her breasts making a loud chuckling sound, almost like laughter.






***


“I’m sorry, little fellow. I thought she was your mistress. Where will you go now? Your home is gone. I can’t expect you to stay with me, I know how mice feel about cats…especially cats that live in squalor, when you‘ve been living in quarters more Royal than even Uriel Septim has. But I’ll bring you somewhere safe, I promise. Maybe the Merchants Inn, it’s the best hotel in the Imperial City. Not as good as you’re used to…unless I put you in Fathis’s suite. He has plenty of thick velvet for you to stay warm in.”

The mouse almost looked like he could answer me, his expression so alert and attention riveted on my face as I spoke. I opened my mouth to tell him what a smart little fellow he was when suddenly the night sky was rent with a terrible scream, louder than the roaring of Falanu’s shop burning.

The mouse was as frightened as I was, his fur buffed out and just as spiked as mine. Both our eyes were widened in fear. He shot up my arm and into the sack of rolls before I could blink.

My hands shook as I tied the sack back around my waist, then as I stood there trembling the wooden boards covering a nearby cave were pushed out from the inside. In horror I watched as vampires began pouring out making a howling noise as if to answer the scream.

Without taking time to think I cast a spell to walk over water and grabbed Falanu by the ankles, taking off at a dead run and dragging her out into the Rumare behind me.

The spell only worked on me, and the mouse and sack were tied to me. A gurgling sound made me realize my error. I tugged her legs harder to me, then reached down quickly and grabbed at her dress. It tore in my hands, but not before I was able to grab one arm. I pulled hard so her head emerged from the lake, sputtering.

Without listening to her screams and cursing I continued running across the lake. I drug her through the water behind me by just a tight grip on one of her arms, aiming toward the torches lighting the Refuge Camp that had been set up on the banks of the City Isle.

A few times something tugged hard against me and her shrieking got worse. The thick velvet of her dress when wet became so heavy that I barely made it across the lake to the other shore, but it did seem to lighten up just before we reached the shallows.

I heaved Falanu onto the shore, then stumbled and fell across her. “Where’s your dress?” I pushed myself up from her naked breast. “Geez, you don’t wear a bra or corset either?”

“RAPE! GUARDS!” Falanu shrieked.


*

This post has been edited by mALX: Jul 2 2011, 03:25 AM

[Acadian]

What a divine surprise that you provided us with an update! Darn, this was enchantingly good! I laughed the whole way through.

And ALIX THE MOUSE! I sure have missed the little fellow since MF 1.0.

“FAWAU, ELPH!” I shouted around the sweetroll in my mouth. Her expression looked like she may combust at any second as her face appeared below me.'
Your selection of letters here was absolutely perfect. Clear enough to convey both the meaning and that Maxical's mouth was full of sweet roll.

'Changing directions mid-air had not been easy,'
Here you give us the most wonderful reminder that Maxical is a cat as she no doubt spun, twisted and changed directions in the air to land on her feet - er, I mean atop 'Fawau'.

'HEY! What is my dress doing over my head? Why are there long scratches on my butt?”
What a hilarious direction you took this, as well as so many elements of this purely delightful episode. Bravo, mALX! Oh, my stomach hurts from laughing.

Did I mention how much I loved this!

[Jacki Dice]

You burned my house down to escape and robbed me! And only the gods know what you’ve been doing to me while I was passed out! Rescued my pet? Is that some euphemism for my privates? You disgusting pervert!

I guess we know what Falanu thinks Maxical was arrested for

And is that Alix the mouse? I can't be sure since there is no mention of him looking like a furry black pumpkin!

[King Coin]

I don't know why but I find it really funny that Maxical is noticing how nice everything in the house is... after it's all KINDLING.

Saving the mouse and sweetrolls??? GAAAH!! Get some priorities girl!


That wasn't a PET Maxical! Alix will have a friend now!

 The thick velvet of her dress when wet became so heavy that I barely made it across the lake to the other shore,  but it did seem to lighten up just before we reached the shallows

Maxical you really mean well but come ON.

mALX you really out did yourself! This chapter is so funny! Fantastic chapter!

[D.Foxy]

*FOXY has just died laughing*

[Grits]

I nearly singed my tail as I darted across to the steps leading up to her private quarters. There was no time to stop and admire the lavish furnishings of her bedroom as I shot across to the dormered window and struggled to open the sash, but I can’t say I didn’t notice with envy the luxury of everything. She must be as rich as Fathis! Was everyone from Morrowind wealthy? Would she expect me to save some of her exquisite items?

I had to quote this passage, because it shows so many things I love about your writing. You set the scene so well that I can easily imagine it, but you manage to do it in the middle of the action without slowing down at all. Maxical’s actions covey her state of mind so well, you don’t need to tell us, we know how she’s feeling. Instead you give us her racing thoughts, which are hilarious and so Maxical.

Pet mouse? Sweetrolls? I thought I would injure myself laughing, but I couldn’t stop reading to calm down. Who else would drag Falanu to safety from a fire and vampires even after the death threats!

The mouse was as frightened as I was, his fur buffed out and just as spiked as mine. Both our eyes were widened in fear. He shot up my arm and into the sack of rolls before I could blink.

The identical expressions of terror from both cat and mouse, you are a genius. Your foul-mouthed, fainting, pantiless Falanu has thoroughly eclipsed the game one. Now that I know she goes commando, I don’t think I can go back to her shop in Skingrad!

mALX, this goes down as an instant classic, and a now and future favorite. I know reading it again will brighten many more days to come!!

[treydog]

Reading! Trying to catch up... Tree is now off the roof- now if work would just settle down....

Of course- I have to be careful- people look at me funny when I start snortling at my desk.

[haute ecole rider]

At last we see Maxical up to her old classic antics once more! I kind of missed that sort of slapstick comedy that she is so good at.

And would this be Alix before she met our white Khajiit?

[Doommeister]

*cough* *cough* *choke*

*Doommeister passes out in a fit of uncontrollable laughter*

[ghastley]

I nearly singed my tail ...

NOW she notices this? I'd have expected it to be as hairless as a mouse's after the first fireball, considering how it happened.

[hazmick]

PAHAHAAHHA! Brilliant! Poor Falanu, her shop is ruined and she's now lying on the edge of the lake, at night time, naked. On the plus side, she has some sweetrolls!

Nobody ever gives Maxical a chance to help, but I think this encounter shows us why.

[mALX]

*

Just popping in to post this vid of Maxical (talking and ... singing) in case anyone missed it:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X8GphPxDtTw


*

This post has been edited by mALX: Jul 4 2011, 02:52 AM

[Athynae]

And now I understand the true meaning of "SPEW" um, my monitor really doesn't appreciate the finer points of southern sweet tea!!!! There is probably thick, sticky goo forming somewhere inside the confines of the framing as we speak but THIS WAS AWESOME!!!!!

And you have no idea how bad I needed the laugh, thanks mALX!!!!!

[Thomas Kaira]

AAAAARGH!!!!

I will NEVER look at the old All Things Alchemical building the same way again...



Talk about your gas attacks. And haggis will definitely do that to yah... especially when Falanu Hlaalu is sticking in the organs of her past... playthings. That is one deranged lady. And yet, strangely fitting, too.

Oh, and I love Mousie Alix already, too.

Never a better place to go when the day's got you down and you need a quick giggle (or in your case, a giant snort-filled monitor-spraying delight).

Next up... A New Sun Rises... starring Jim Carrey as Maxical.



This post has been edited by Thomas Kaira: Jul 7 2011, 05:03 AM

[treydog]

I will post a more complete spammage of your thread when I am caught up once more- but Chapter 108 with the "Seridur Serenade" reminded me of this rather long-winded story (as if I know any other kind).

During my misspent 20's, I was in a community theater group. I know, I know- but I am all better now and no longer contagious- so everyone is safe. One season we did South Pacific, only to get trumped by another group with a better space in a nearby city ALSO doing that show.

Some of us (cast and crew) decided to go check out the competition. And here is where this tale applies....

Apparently the competing group had gotten a BAD cast recording of the Broadway show which resulted in their version of "Some Enchanted Evening" sounding like a Bela Lugosi impersonator gargling the lyrics underwater. No kidding.