Jerric's Story, A Nord's Adventures in Cyrodiil Options

[haute ecole rider]

I have to admit that I'm liking Lildereth more and more. The way she handles Jerric is awesome! Just enough to keep him off balance, but not so much to reduce him to a blabbering pile of self-pitying tears. And of course, his Macho is acting up in response, and he resolves (likely subconsciously) to do better so he can raise her esteem of him. Excellent!

I seem to get the sense that Darnand is rather oblivious to all of this, though he does make an effort to demonstrate his loyalty to Jerric, albeit belatedly.

[mALX]

This note is copied and pasted on everyone whose story I am having to neglect for a few days - mainly because my eyes are burning too badly to keep looking at the screen :


"I'll be back!" (spoken in an Arnold voice). I haven't had time to read this week - way too much going on, my week has been hectic as H !! When I have gotten any free time my eyes and mind were burned out, lol. I'll be back to read this when I get a bit of a break in the rat-race pace around here. (sorry about that )

[Ceidwad]

“All right,” Jerric said. He felt ill at ease in the dark, but less than he would have thought. “How did I sound back there?” he asked Lildereth.

“Like a pack of blind snow bears.” Her tone relayed her disgust.

“I’m not wearing real armor,” Jerric objected. He thought he had sounded rather stealthy.

Pfft. What does a Bosmer know about being a Nord? Nice comparison of how two individuals can view the same event entirely differently.

Her eyes looked oddly pale to Jerric in his potion’s light. He decided that Lildereth appeared calm and alert. Darnand seemed excited and a little nervous. Jerric tested his own emotional state. He felt slightly worried.

I love how Jerric has to stop and think about how he feels! That is one slow-thinking Jerric!

[mALX]

Jerric leaned against the dining hall’s door frame, waiting for Darnand to finish speaking with Abiene. The two of them stood with their heads bent slightly together. Both of them had their arms crossed over their chests. Darnand wore the intent expression that usually indicated he was deeply involved in his work, and an excellent target for a prank. Abiene’s pink cheeks and sweet mouth filled Jerric’s mind with a rush of distracting images. He wrenched his attention back with an effort.

They make a handsome couple, he noticed. Both of them dark-haired and elegant. They even sound good together. Their voices rose and fell in the lilting cadence that he associated with Bretons. They mostly sound that way when they’re talking to each other, he realized.

Darnand turned and started toward him, and Abiene looked over at Jerric behind his back. Her dark eyes seemed to fill with promise.

This scene was a paradox! Candid glimpses into thoughts and actions, the parties involved unaware (Darnand mostly). Subtly simple scene - but huge in the complexity of the relationships between the three. HUGE scene you wrote here, AWESOME !!!!

“How did I sound back there?” he asked Lildereth.

“Like a pack of blind snow bears.” Her tone relayed her disgust.

ROFL !!!

Lildereth's instructions on sneaking to the two of them had me in stitches!

"Get away from the door. We might as well knock if you two are going to stand out here arguing.”

ROFL !! Lildereth is a perfect addition to this story, and is bringing out the best examples of why I love the way Jerric and Darnand play off each other when they are together. When Abiene is the third party the boyish comaraderie between them is stifled by the intrigue of secrets and desires.

It is amazing how complex you have made your characters, and how real their personalities are! This chapter really showcases your talent and ability, Awesome !!! This may be my all time favorite chapter to date, and it has had some very tough competition for that position!!

[Acadian]

'Lildereth turned inland before he even wanted a snack.'
No one else but Jerric could measure time in terms of food. It is testimony to how vividly you bring him to us that such a comment seems as natural as eating a sweet roll.

'Lildereth’s expression informed him how he sounded.'
Once again, I'm so impressed by how beautifully you weave your connective passages into your dialogue.

Lildereth thinks so very much like, well, a Bosmer! Working in the shadows is so second nature to her. How wonderfully you bring each of your characters to life. Each in their own way in this episode, but it was a joy to see Abiene, Darnand, Lildereth and of course our lovable Nordic hero (the blind snow bear/big man himself).

Nit? 'The dressed stone surround appeared to be intact, but the ground had fallen or washed away under it. '
Something seems to be missing here? Perhaps '…surrounding the entrance appeared to be…' ?

[SubRosa]

Meat’s not ready yet!
Well given Lildreth's earlier comment, I think Jerric can provide that...

Nice display of professionalism on the parts of Lildreth and Darnand. Jerric seems to still have a bit to be desired there. But at least he knows it. What a stark, and welcome, contrast to the game, where the only strategy you need is walk here, kill that, repeat.

Lildreth is about as friendly as a badger having a bad day. I wonder if she is always so abrasive, of if it is just the thought of her getting killed because Jerric and Darnand are not stealthy enough? I suppose only time will tell.

[Grits]

D.Foxy: Jerric’s sword might argue that it prefers to stay snugly encased in the dark. Scabbard, that is. But we all know how it likes to come out and play. I think Lildereth must have an inner redhead. Thank you for your comments on the dialog! Sometimes it seems I’m just writing down what they say. Now we’ve reached a point where they’re going to have to shut up and fight. Lildereth is pretty much the opposite of Jerric, I think the contrast is what makes him more “Jerric” in this segment. Your description of him made me smile!

haute ecole rider: You have described what Lildereth is doing perfectly, I love it! You’re right, Darnand is oblivious to Lildereth’s management of Jerric. He’s still thinking about how he’ll adjust to combat without getting killed or accidentally killing his teammates. He’s a long way from the summoning chamber now.

mALX: Thank you so much for pointing out that little opening scene. It was just people looking at each other, and I was worried that the point wouldn’t come across. You’re right, Lildereth and Darnand let Jerric stay in the moment, but he has to govern himself when Abiene is around. And we know that doesn’t come easily to him. Thank you for your kind words, mALX!

Ceidwad: Sitting around and chatting while the enemy is within charging distance is a new one for Jerric. He usually wouldn’t think until he was through the door, and then it would be a different kind of thinking. Given time to plan, he’s having a little trouble separating out the relevant information. I’m glad you noticed that!

Acadian: You’re right about the “surround,” I described the entrance as if it was a fireplace. Oops! Thank you, I changed it. Your kind words about our friends in Anvil warmed my heart. And to hear that Lildereth thinks like a Bosmer from one who carries an elf on his shoulder, well that was just wonderful!

SubRosa: I didn’t think of that, I’m sure Jerric is always ready to provide the meat. Lildereth as a grumpy badger made me chuckle. She certainly does not serve her remarks with a sugar coating. No one would mistake her for a diplomat! You are spot on with her concern that the other two might get her killed, especially the Nord. I’m happy to hear that the departure from the game is welcome. Hero or not, there are so many things that he would just not be able to reasonably do on his own!


Where we are: Jerric, Darnand, and Lildereth are creeping up on some zombies in an Ayleid ruin. Some more quietly than others.



Chapter 11 Holidays: Part 4

Jerric moved smoothly into the room, with Darnand behind him. Jerric broke to the right the way they had planned. The stench hit him, and he gagged a little. His mouth filled with cold spit. You can throw up later, he told himself. The zombies were spread throughout the chamber, and there was plenty of open space to move. Jerric glanced over to make sure Darnand was in position. They both kept to the wall, with the zombies in the middle. The zombies hadn’t noticed them. Darnand gave Jerric a quick nod.

Jerric summoned Precious at the same time a flame atronach whooshed into the space in front of Darnand. Precious flung its grotesque head back and chortled its delight. With a wave of his arm, Jerric sent the scamp at one of the middle zombies. Flares filled the chamber with their distinctive sound and orange light, telling Jerric that Darnand had begun. Jerric picked out the two zombies remaining on his side of the chamber. He bathed each of them with his fire spell as he closed with the first one. Redeemer sang in his hand, sending a jolt of pure joy through him. Take them down quickly, he told himself. This is not a game.

The first zombie reached him, its fur still smoldering from Jerric’s flare. It raised its arms with a shuddering groan. Its lower jaw was missing, leaving a gaping hollow under the Khajiit snout. Jerric stepped neatly to the side as it attacked, running his blade across the zombie’s abdomen through to the backbone. Nothing came sliding out.

His second zombie had its arms raised to attack him, about three running steps away. Take them down first, Jerric thought. Let them wear themselves out until we finish them on the ground. He moved around to his right as the first zombie turned. The center of the room was a blaze of flame and smoke. He saw Darnand cast a ball of fire. When the second zombie reached him, Jerric dodged the downward strike and circled quickly around. His back to the room, he made his slashes at the zombie’s knees. The creature didn’t fall.

Jerric danced back toward the wall again, readying his fire spell. He glanced over the room as he sent another pair of flares at the zombies. Precious and the flame atronach were still at work, and he could see Darnand. He renewed his grip on the Wolf shield and readied for another strike with his sword.

This time he lunged back when the zombie attacked, then brought Redeemer down across both of its arms. Pieces of zombie fell to the floor. He stepped back and recovered his balance. The smoldering Khajiit was behind this zombie, pushing against its back. Jerric twisted his hips and slashed at the leading zombie’s knees. He scrambled back as it toppled toward him.

To his surprise, the Khajiit zombie stepped over its fallen companion without tripping. Jerric heard his scamp’s death squawk and quickly called it back from the Void. He kept his eyes on the Khajiit zombie as he backed away from it. A wave of his sword returned Precious to the fight.

Jerric timed his strike the same way against this zombie, waiting for the pause as it recovered its balance to slash its legs out from under it. With his two opponents thrashing and groaning on the floor, Jerric took a moment to check on the rest of the battle.

He saw Darnand throw fire at a flaming zombie, then run a few steps to avoid its attack. Two dark shapes lay motionless in the middle of the room. Precious and the flame atronach were engaged in a leaping, fiery struggle against each other.

Darnand is doing well, he decided. This is a good chance to try out my new spell. Too bad I’ll have to touch the damned thing.

Both of Jerric’s zombies were upright again, only now they were slowly sliding forward on their knee stumps. Jerric put down his sword and readied the spell.

After the first instant of disgust, Jerric felt a surge of pure elation as the energy that animated the undead thing rushed into him. He cast the spell again before the zombie slumped to the floor. As he stepped back to compose himself, he caught Darnand’s eye. The room had gone quiet and empty of summonings. “That is a good spell,” Jerric breathed.

Darnand walked over. “You made peace with Gulitte,” he stated. His voice sounded calm, but very tight.

“Yeah.”

“That is more than I have been able to do.”

“Darnand,” Jerric said fervently, “You’ve got to try it.”

The remaining zombie let out a gurgling groan. Jerric felt for his magicka. Too low. He picked up his sword and slashed the zombie’s chest until it fell.

The room was silent again. Jerric slipped his ring back on for a moment, but nothing was approaching. Lildereth and Darnand were already in front of him.

“Did you use a spell to turn one of them?” Lildereth asked Darnand. Jerric’s guts gave a powerful heave. He swallowed it down. The greasy smoke in the room was slowly rising to the high ceiling, but the smell was still thick. His hand remembered touching rotten skin.

“I did,” Darnand replied calmly. “It would be useful to—”

Jerric bent over and hurled the contents of his stomach onto the stone floor. The sound of splashing covered the rest of Darnand’s statement. “I beg your pardon,” Jerric coughed, with as much dignity as he could muster. He turned his head and spit a few times to clear his mouth.

“It would be useful to have them turn on one another instead of fleeing,” Darnand continued without comment. They all stepped a few paces away from the puddle. To Jerric’s relief, Lildereth neither gagged nor laughed at him. She held out her canteen, still looking at Darnand. Wait, Jerric thought. That’s my canteen. He took it from her and rinsed his mouth. “I will give the matter some thought,” Darnand finished.

Lildereth’s eyes went to Jerric. “The way you move when you fight. Why don’t you always move that way?”

“Well, that would be, uh, tiring.”

“I mean when we’re trying not to be heard or seen.” She stepped over and put her hands on him. “Keep your muscles tight here, and loose here. Firm but not rigid. Balance like you’re about to strike when you step. You’ll be lighter on your feet.”

That made a lot of sense to Jerric. “Yeah, I can do that. I won’t be very fast, though.”

“You don’t need to be fast unless you’re noisy. Then we’ll all have to be fast.”

“Right,” Jerric said. He grinned at her and slapped himself on the stomach. “Maybe you could show me where I should stay tight one more time.”

Lildereth looked over at Darnand and rolled her eyes. Darnand smiled at his feet. Jerric laughed. “I’m glad you don’t take offense easily,” he remarked.

“I’m glad you don’t either,” she said lightly. Her attention went to Darnand. “You trapped their souls.”

“Two of them,” Darnand replied. “At this point we need the magicka more than we need coin.” He reached into his belt pouch and handed a gem to Jerric. “I should save it for Fort Strand, if at all possible. I doubt any of the gang will have the courtesy to attack you with spells.”

Jerric nodded his thanks. “How could there be any energy left to trap?” he asked. It had seemed clear when they discussed it before, but now he was confused again.

“I expect it is released from the enchantment itself when it is broken,” Darnand said to him. “You will recall that the will of the necromancer—”

“Let’s save the lecture,” said Lildereth. “Keep the noise down, and watch our exit.” She moved through one of the doors without a sound.

Once he had wiped down his gear, Jerric poked through the remains along the chamber’s walls. He made a small pile of salvageable items near the door. The bodies had been stripped of their armor and left to rot, but the equipment had been discarded nearby. Maybe whoever made the zombies is going to use them for new skeletons, Jerric thought. He couldn’t think of any way to identify who they had been, or even accurately guess how long they had lain here. Their gathered bits of metal looked pitiful to him. They must have come in here looking for trouble just like we did, he thought.

He picked up a short sword and examined the blade. Good balance, he thought. Feels like Captain Renault’s sword. Then he mentally kicked himself. I already have a shorter sword, he realized. Stashed it in the bottom of my pack when I got Chillrend. A lot of help right now.

“We should harvest some mort flesh from these zombies,” Darnand said. “Though these are still quite wet, it should still be worth the weight we will have to carry.”

“I guess there’s some meat left that isn’t burned.” Jerric’s stomach heaved again. He tried to smother the resulting belch. “I’d be grateful if you did the harvesting. I’ll carry it, if it doesn’t drip too much.”

Industrious and revolting sounds began to drift from Darnand’s direction. “All things considered, I prefer to harvest energy from zombies,” Darnand remarked.

“That passage is blocked,” Lildereth said softly from across the chamber. Jerric jumped a little. “I’m going down the other one.”

Several moments later, she returned. “Through a long passage, up nine steps, a left turn, a shorter passage, a small chamber, and another passage. Well lit past the steps. There’s a larger space beyond all that. Three necromancers, by their robes. One is an Altmer, the other two Imperial or Breton. I couldn’t get a shot without alerting the survivors. It appears to be a living space, with desks and table. Bedrolls on the floor, so watch your feet. There are no side passages, and only one other way out of the larger chamber. All of the doorways are open. We could always retreat the way we came in. What do you think?”

Jerric gave Darnand a nod. “Let us continue,” Darnand said. “Expect summonings. I will attempt to dispel them, but I am unsure how effective I will be.”

“If they summon scamps, I’m sure your flame atronach will be happy to attack them,” Lildereth said with some amusement.

Darnand glanced sheepishly at Jerric. “She must have thought Precious hit her,” he explained.

Lildereth looked at Jerric. “Save your sight potion, the fellow in the first chamber won’t hear you in the long passageway.”

The fellow’s death stench greeted them while they were still in the corridor. They discovered that he had been a Dunmer male. He wore a black robe with a rust colored skull insignia on the chest. He lay on the floor beside a chair and work table. An arrow protruded from his throat. Jerric guessed that Lildereth had used poison, and didn’t want to risk retrieving it. He saw Darnand’s eyes go to the notes on the Dunmer’s table. “On the way back,” he said softly to Darnand.

“What if we do not return this way?” Darnand asked, an edge to his voice.

Lildereth silenced them with a look. Her voice was hardly more than a breath. “I’ll stay by the door and look for a shot. If we retreat, don’t wait for me. You won’t be able to see me.”

Jerric moved swiftly through the final corridor. Cold bluish light came down from stones set in fixtures on the walls. His ring showed him the glows of three living things in the chamber ahead. Not for long, he thought grimly. He slipped the ring back into his pocket. His fingers twitched, waiting for him to fill them with frost.

[mALX]

Whew! What a lot of action and ... even puking !!! These three work well together, I am liking the pairing here a lot !!! It seems to be good for all three of them, as far as them being able to be themselves around each other. Loving this new turn of events with the addition of Lildereth, they could be the three Muskateers traveling across Cyrodiil, lol. Great Write !!!

[Ceidwad]

This is turning out to be a very detailed and enjoyable dungeon crawl! The encounter with the zombies is dynamically described and I really felt as though I was there in the ruins with your three characters. As ever, Jerric's personality is straightforwardly hilarious.

The stench hit him, and he gagged a little. His mouth filled with cold spit. You can throw up later, he told himself.
.
.
.
“I did,” Darnand replied calmly. “It would be useful to—”

Jerric bent over and hurled the contents of his stomach onto the stone floor. The sound of splashing covered the rest of Darnand’s statement. “I beg your pardon,” Jerric coughed, with as much dignity as he could muster. He turned his head and spit a few times to clear his mouth.

“It would be useful to have them turn on one another instead of fleeing,” Darnand continued without comment.


Brilliant timing to have Jerric cut Darnand off mid-sentence. And Darnand is typically understated in his reaction. Quite a pair, those two! I laughed, heartily.

Lildereth also is coming to the fore with some nice character fleshing. Whilst her basic personality type was clear in previous episodes, we can see the results of that in this episode. It is clear that is the introverted, silent, observing type, but that comes up trumps here as she is calm enough in the heat of battle to notice Jerric's quieter movements, and suggest to him that he move that way outside of battle to avoid detection.

This post has been edited by Ceidwad: Jun 18 2011, 02:19 AM

[Acadian]

Well done! A fight among three allies, two summons and three zombies is a lot to keep track of, yet you rendered it with perfect clarity. Clear enough to smell it! It was great to see Jerric a little more in his element (swinging a blade). Wonderful comaraderie developing among the three amigos.

In this episode, no less than three times, you caused me to ask myself questions, formulate a theory, then you confirmed my theory. This is a fun thing and makes the reader feel good when they 'get it right'. See what I mean:

1. You mentioned that a zombie's fur was smoldering. I thought about that for a moment and figured you meant a Khajiit zombie. Very shortly you confirmed that. Neat.

2. You described at one point that Precious and Darnand's flame atronachs were fighting each other. I did a double take on that, then thought about it. Summon gone rogue? Turned by a foe? Friendly fire? Then, sure enough near the end of the episode you suggested that it was friendly fire.

3. As Jerric was spraying spells, I found myself getting concerned about his atronach birth sign stunted magicka. Sure enough again, by the end of the episode you confirmed that he was indeed low on magicka.

This ability to provide 'loose ends' that you proceed to neatly tie up with a bow is quite a skill you have. As I said, well done!

[D.Foxy]

Wow, you just get....better and better! The action had me on the edge of my seat, and of course...Jerric just keeps getting more 'Jerric' in every post!

[SubRosa]

An exciting, smelly furball, with daedra vs. undead vs. humans. I don't blame Jerric for tossing his cookies. I bet like tauntons, the insides of those things smell even worse than the outside. I thought the description of the khajiit zombie missing its lower jaw was a good touch. We never see khajiit (or Argonian) undead in the game. The addition was a nice touch, show us how you are breaking away from the game, and making the story your own. Many fan-fic writers never get to that point.

I was going to point the finger at Lildreth for not pulling her weight in the fight, when later we found the dead necromancer whom she had shot. So she is proving her worth after all. I see she is mellowing out somewhat too. The way she stole Jerric's canteen and then offered it to him was very cleverly amusing.

[Grits]

mALX: Well, Jerric did say that he throws up a lot! I completely forgot to put a barf warning on this section. I’m sorry!! I’m so glad you’re enjoying the three of them. You’re right, they can all just be themselves.

Ceidwad: Thank you for your kind words! I’m glad you’re enjoying it. To hear that Jerric made you laugh is delightful, as I so enjoy the humor that you weave throughout Gwen’s diary.

Acadian: Jerric was quite relieved to start swinging his blade, and quit clowning around in dark hallways. I am so delighted that the way the details were revealed seemed to work. It can be tricky for me to get the explaining in and still keep the POV! I’m glad the camaraderie is coming through, Lildereth can sound a little harsh. Thank you, Acadian!

D.Foxy: A long delay between posts usually means I’m struggling with a fight. To hear that you enjoyed it means so much to me! Thank you, Foxy!

SubRosa: I remember how impressed I was with the zombies that Teresa and Chance encountered, and how they were so individual. That inspired me to think about making mine more interesting than the game shows us. Lildereth needs a bow like Teresa’s in her video, otherwise you will not catch her messing around with zombies! A distracted necromancer at his desk is a target more to her liking. I’m glad you enjoyed her stunt with the canteen.


Where we are: Jerric, Darnand, and Lildereth are sneaking up on some necromancers.


Chapter 11 Holidays: Part 5

Jerric knelt in the final passageway, watching Lildereth fiddle with her arrows and vials. Warm light flooded out into the corridor, casting them into shadow. He felt like a coiled serpent before the strike. The waiting might be harder than the fight, he decided. His teeth felt gritty from his magicka potion. He heard a man in the chamber ahead speaking with a Colovian accent, answered by an Altmer’s nasal tones.

“All I’m saying is that you could buy more ham and bread,” said the unseen Colovian. His tone was peevish. “These onions and cabbages have to be prepared. I did not come here to drudge for you!”

“Your base nature reveals itself through your petty concerns, Domitius,” sneered the Altmer.

Lildereth nocked an arrow and vanished with a flicker of magicka. Darnand crept up beside Jerric. The Colovian continued to bicker with the Altmer, both of them still out of Jerric’s sight.

Jerric had an idea. “You should wear my helm,” he whispered to Darnand. “Fire shield.”

Darnand shook his head. “No time. Besides, they won’t use fire in their own dwelling.”

“It’s stone,” Jerric pointed out.

Darnand glared at him. “Will you—”

A commotion began in the chamber. “Domitius!” came a woman’s anguished cry. Jerric lunged to his feet and charged the last paces down the corridor. As he ran, he heard the air in the chamber rip open with the sound that announced a summoning.

He took in the scene with a glance. Shelves lined the walls. Desks and tables jutted into the room, piled with parchment, books, and litter. Bedrolls cluttered the space between. One man convulsed on the floor with an arrow in his neck. A woman slid to her knees beside him, still calling his name. An Altmer was on his feet, towering over a table near the center of the chamber. A zombie stood beside him, headless and slouched to the side. The Altmer’s eyes snapped to Jerric as he entered the room. The Altmer pointed his hand toward Jerric with a wordless cry. The mer first, thought Jerric.

Jerric started toward the Altmer, pulling frost into his hand. The zombie took a lurching step toward Jerric. The Altmer’s body jerked and spun. A ball of Darnand’s fire burst against him as he fell. Jerric saw an arrow sprouting from the mer’s back.

The zombie couldn’t reach him yet. Jerric turned his attention to the woman on the floor. She began to stand, raising her right hand. Her face was a mask of fury. Jerric cast his frost at her. Her spell interrupted, she fell back to the floor with a cry. Jerric heard a sound like the one Slim made when he returned to wherever he spent his days. The zombie is gone, he thought. The Altmer must be dead. The woman struggled to her knees, hampered by her black robe. A glance told Jerric that Darnand was still out of the way, filling his hands with more fire. Jerric could easily reach her over the Colovian’s body. He drew his sword and removed the woman’s head.

Her skull made a sharp crack when it hit the stones. Her body slumped to the floor an instant later. Jerric heard Darnand’s flare hiss as it dissipated. For a moment the chamber was silent. “I think she was a Breton,” Darnand said from behind Jerric. His voice sounded a little tight.

Lildereth placed an arrow on the table and walked over. She appeared completely unruffled. “Sometimes it’s hard for me to tell Bretons from Imperials. Jerric, keep an eye on that corridor with your ring, please.”

Jerric felt like he needed to run to the lighthouse and back. He still hadn’t learned how to tell his body when a quick fight was over. He considered for a moment while he dug in his pocket for the ring. “That was a pretty good ball of frost I hit her with. I guess an Imperial should have stayed down longer.” He watched the corridor for approaching life signs, but he directed his question at Lildereth. “Did you get that Altmer with poison? I didn’t see you shoot.”

“Good, you’re not supposed to see me. It takes a moment for the poison to kill. Don’t touch that arrow on the table, it’s coated with poison, too. If the woman had kept her head, I would have shot her first and let you two take the Altmer down with your frost and fire. It seems we all had the same idea about the most immediate threat. Jerric, I suppose you don’t mind cleaning your sword.”

Jerric snorted. “Kept her head.” He looked over to find Lildereth watching him. Her eyebrow had achieved an unlikely angle. “Oh, you’re asking why I didn’t use a spell. Uh, sign of the Atronach. Makes me want to save my magicka. Besides, the way she was hunched a little with her chin raised, who could resist a chance like that? I wanted to see if Redeemer could do it. One clean sweep through the neck.” He finished wiping the blade between glances at the passage. “Are we going to move on? The air’s getting a little thick in here.”

“I want to go through these notes before we leave,” Darnand said firmly. “They all wear the same robes. That alone confirms my suspicions.”

Lildereth shared a look with Jerric. “Suit yourself. I’ll scout ahead.” She picked up her arrow and moved silently through the open doorway.

Jerric kept his ring on, glancing between Lildereth’s corridor and their exit. “Look around now, if you like,” he told Darnand. “I’ll watch the doors. Take all the notes, they won’t be too heavy. I think we should burn what we leave behind here. No need to leave it comfortable for the next band of fetchers.”

Lildereth returned while Darnand was tying his stack of parchment into a bundle. “Skeletons,” she said. “I counted eight with hafted weapons and shields, no archers. It’s a huge chamber, low ceiling with support columns. More of this dim blue light. Looks like one Ayleid passageway leading out, and a tunnel recently cut through soil.”

Jerric slipped off his ring so he could see Darnand’s expression. “I saw an axe in the zombie room. I’m going back to get it. I’m not going to nick my sword on a bunch of enchanted bones. We can draw them back into the corridor if they all get interested at once.”

Darnand nodded. His face looked tense and a little eager. “I would like to get some more experience with my flare at various distances. I can turn them if they get too close to me.”

“All right,” Jerric said. “Of course I’ll need mine to get in close. You should carry that necromancer’s staff, just in case. Even if you just use your own spells, you could block with it. I worry that you don’t have any weapon.”

Now Darnand’s voice sounded as composed as it did at the dinner table. “Indeed, my conjured dagger is little use to me. I do not know how to wield it. Along similar lines, I hesitate to carry a staff for the first time into combat. I might present a hazard to myself and both of you. When we return to Anvil, let us discuss my need for defensive training. For today, I will move back if a skeleton gets too close to me. If necessary, my daedroth should be adequate to cover our retreat. Jerric, you must remember to take the turn to the right after the zombie chamber, if we remove ourselves from this ruin in haste.”

“Yeah,” said Jerric. “I looked back at it when we came through, like you said. Course if we’re leaving in a hurry, you’d better be in front of me. I’ll just follow your flapping robe. I wouldn’t mind seeing your daedroth at work, maybe we should start with him. But I guess that would cause some fuss.” He looked at Lildereth. “What would you do if you were here on your own?”

“Slip past them or leave,” she said with a little smile. “My arrows would do little damage to skeletons. But I never would have come past the zombies. Darnand, I suggest we reserve your daedroth unless the skeletons attack in too large a force. Our Nord has anticipated my objection.”

Jerric grinned at her. “First I got a ‘please,’ and now you suggest? Someone found her manners.”

Lildereth’s smile finally warmed her face. “I’ve worked with a lot of folk. Most don’t try to shoulder more weight than is given them. Many attempt to take on less. Assuming you don’t get us killed today, I would like to join you on the Fort Strand job. Get the axe, Jerric, I’ll wait up in the corridor.” She started toward the far doorway, then stopped and turned back. “But I’ll still speak the plain truth, the way I see it. I find it saves a lot of time and misunderstanding.”

She continued through the doorway. “I expect it also saves her from numerous social obligations and encumbering friendships,” Darnand remarked softly.

“I guess when you’re that size, you better scare them stickless right away," said Jerric. "She can always be nice later.”

This post has been edited by Grits: Jun 24 2011, 12:18 PM

[haute ecole rider]

What a great couple of chapters! I enjoyed the planning that went into this ruin, that and the scouting. These three are settling in well with each other. I liked that Darnand admits he needs to pull in some defensive training. That's a warrior's mindset - think about what went wrong (or almost did) and figure out what needs to be done so the same thing doesn't happen again; also think about the worst case scenario and figure out what needs to happen to make it come out in one's own favor.

Yes, these combat scenes can be a [honored user] to write, believe me I know what you mean!

And this:

“I guess when you’re that size, you better scare them stickless right away," said Jerric.

Had my mind going places that you may not have intended it to! Stickless, huh? Is that any more effective than castration? Yup, definitely my kind of heroine!

[mALX]

Darnand always surprises me when he shows eagerness to get into a scrap and practice destruction spells - not sure why, lol. I thought he would lose it at the beheading, and not really sure what inner reaction Lildereth had. GAAAAAH! The storms are back, I have to unplug AGAIN !!! ARGH !!! Great Write !!!

[Acadian]

'He took in the scene with a glance. Shelves lined the walls. Desks and tables jutted into the room, piled with parchment, books, and litter. Bedrolls cluttered the space between. One man convulsed on the floor with an arrow in his neck. A woman slid….'
Here you demonstrate the perfect balance required during a fight scene. Enough detail to immerse your reader, but delivered with a volume and pacing that does not bog things down when a sense of quick tempo is required. Well done indeed!

'Jerric heard a sound like the one Slim made when he returned to wherever he spent his days. The zombie is gone, he thought. The Altmer must be dead.
How brilliant to use the zombie's disappearance as evidence that his summoner has expired!

'Jerric could easily reach her over the Colovian’s body. He drew his sword and removed the woman’s head.'
I wanted to cheer here. Poor Jerric had been watching the little elf's lethal arrows appearing in the necks of foes. And Darnand was delivering effective flame from afar. It was about time that Jerric really got to show everyone what a Nord with a sword can do! Bravo, Champion!

“That was a pretty good ball of frost I hit her with. I guess an Imperial should have stayed down longer.”
Given the context, what a fabulous way to confirm the target was Breton, with their magic resistance.

'Lildereth placed an arrow on the table and walked over.'
In your last story, I complimented you on delivering a loose end (like the passage above. Then once again, in the passage below, you neatly wrap up the 'why did she do that?' Very enjoyable.
Don’t touch that arrow on the table, it’s coated with poison, too.

Although you know my heart identifies so very much with the shadowy but skittish Lildereth, you once again provided the full measure of justice to all three of our adventurers as they continue to prepare for Fort Strand.

[Grits]

haute ecole rider: I’m so glad you’re enjoying Lildereth’s contribution. Planning and scouting are not Jerric’s thing! Thank you for pointing that out about Darnand. It’s been fun getting him out of the library. There were some awkward conversations that contributed to the term ‘stickless’! Mr. Grits has some friends who might run away when they see me next.

mALX: I think Darnand is such a magic nerd, it’s surprising that he wants to leave his books. But all of his study is for a purpose, as we’re starting to see. Jerric also thought Darnand might lose it at the beheading, so Jerric was surprised, too. I wrote this section and the last one together, but they’re posted separately since they got too long. A couple of Jerric’s unfinished thoughts get resolved next.

Acadian: Thank you for mentioning Lildereth’s third arrow. I’m departing from the game mechanics of one poison at a time, and three enemies would mean three prepared arrows. I’m particularly grateful for your endorsement of Jerric’s quick sword work. As you pointed out, he was ready to show his stuff! I really appreciate your guidance with the pacing and level of detail of this scene. The elements that you mentioned are exactly the things I have been struggling with.

Where we are: Jerric, Darnand, and Lildereth are sneaking up on some skeletons.


Chapter 11 Holidays: Part 6

Jerric and Darnand followed Lildereth to the entrance of a broad, dimly lit chamber. Jerric could see where metal gates must have once closed off the doorway. Squared-off columns supported the ceiling at regular, wide-spaced intervals. Won’t be hard to move around, thought Jerric. The air smelled a little fresher in here. He could see the skeletons’ glows. Three of them slouched unmoving within a dozen steps of where they knelt in the entry. The others paced or stood toward the chamber’s far end.

Jerric spoke to Darnand in a low voice. “I’ll move to the right, same as before. Stay a little behind me so you can duck back into the passageway if you get overwhelmed. Better to decide it’s time to retreat before you’re in real trouble. One hit can break your bones, and that’s very distracting. I may get too busy to look back at you, so yell out if you’re going to change the plan. If you see me fall, summon your daedroth and get back in the corridor. This should be a steady piece of work. Let’s try to keep it from getting too exciting.” Jerric slipped off his ring and put it back in his pocket. He found it hard to judge distance when his enemy was emanating a pinkish glow.

Moving into position got them the attention of the three nearest skeletons. Jerric summoned Slim and sent him to the far group. He heard Darnand’s spell at almost the same time. Darnand’s skeleton followed Slim at a lurching run. Their bony feet clacked against the stone floor, sounding over the clicks and scrapes of the approaching skeletons. Jerric hoped that the enemy skeletons might be confused when they were attacked by what looked like allies. Or Darnand’s summoning could attack Slim, he thought.

Darnand’s flare lit up one approaching skeleton, and a second ball of fire impacted the one behind it almost immediately. He’s casting with both hands, Jerric realized. He felt a moment of pride for his friend. Then Jerric focused on his own fight.

A skeleton had reached him. Jerric waited for its strike, balanced and ready. Years of sparring with Slim gave him confidence. This skeleton carried an iron axe and shield. Jerric timed his lunge so that his axe was in position for his counterstrike. The wooden haft was still solidly attached to the head, but the leather grip had loosened. He kept his attention on his grip as his elbow started the swing. The skeleton’s axe clanged against the stone floor, closer to Jerric’s feet than he liked. He whipped his wrist down, sending his axe under the skeleton’s shield and through its bony knee. The grip slipped a little in his hand, but he held on to it. The skeleton kept its weapon even as it clattered sideways to the floor.

Jerric glanced back at Darnand. One skeleton lay blackened on the floor, and another jogged away from him, smoking. Darnand pointed to the skeleton Jerric had knocked down. “I’ll finish it.”

Jerric nodded and turned back to the fight. He took a few steps into the chamber to get out of Darnand’s way. He ignored the heaving skeleton melee at the back of the room, unable to tell friend from foe. He guessed the survivors would come find him. Two approaching skeletons got his attention. They both were about four paces away.

Lildereth flickered into view farther into the chamber. She hurled a small flare at one of the skeletons near Jerric. It stopped and turned toward her. She threw another flare, her face frightened in its orange glow. Jerric watched her stand for an instant, claiming the skeleton’s attention. Then its partner reached him, and he had to look away from her.

Don’t try to rush, he told himself. A mistake will take longer than a properly timed strike. This skeleton carried a silver mace. I want that, Jerric thought. It clipped Jerric’s shield as he started his swing. His axe missed the knee, sticking into the femur. The impact jarred Jerric through his shoulder. He let go of the axe and danced back, swearing.

Lildereth had disappeared. The skeleton she had scorched turned back toward Jerric. A great clatter and hissing arose from the back of the chamber. Light flared around the skeleton that had Jerric’s axe imbedded in its leg. It turned and loped away. “Here,” Darnand said, beside Jerric. He looked a little wide-eyed. He held out an iron mace with an oversized head.

Jerric took the mace, and Darnand backed toward the door before Jerric could tell him to. Jerric turned to meet the skeleton Lildereth had distracted. He felt almost absently for Slim, and found him gone. Eyes on the approaching skeleton, he summoned Slim back to the chamber. As he felt the magical eddy begin, he cast it away from him, past the approaching skeleton. Slim dropped into his view, already facing the back of the chamber. He lurched into a run toward the fight without further instruction from Jerric.

Jerric tested the iron mace while he shifted his feet. It was too heavy for him, but he would rather not leave Redeemer stuck in a skeleton. The scorched skeleton held a long-handled hammer and shield. Jerric worried that his mace would drop at too sharp an angle, and he would miss the knee again. He decided on an overhead strike. It would take more time, but he wouldn’t miss.

The hammer whistled past his chest and clanged against the floor. Jerric dropped his weight behind his shield and planted his foot on the hammer’s haft. He bashed forward and up from his rear foot, knocking the skeleton back. The skeleton let go of the hammer. Not something to try on an orc, Jerric decided. He swung the mace up as he pushed the skeleton’s shield down with his own. His arm guided the mace’s descent through the skeleton’s shoulder and ribcage, letting the weight do the damage. He stepped back, right eye burning. The damaged skeleton still stood, dropping bones. It burst into flame before it fell in pieces. Darnand is earning his coin today, Jerric thought. The shield rang as it hit the pocked floor. Darnand’s voice came from behind him. “Next!”

Trust the Breton to find his sense of humor now, thought Jerric. He ran a few steps to close with another skeleton. This one had lost its shield. Jerric was surprised when it kept fighting after he sent its skull rolling. They can see with no eyes, he realized. I guess that’s the same as no eye sockets. He was sweating with effort by the time the skeleton shattered. Little recoil meant heaving the mace back into position for each strike.

He took a moment to thumb the blood out of his eye. A crash of bones from the back of the chamber was followed by Slim’s victory rattle. Or it could be Darnand’s skeleton, Jerric admitted. At this distance with one eye, he couldn’t be sure. He knew the fight was over when Lildereth appeared in front of him.

“Here,” she said, motioning him down. When he bent, she scrubbed his face with something, then pressed it against his eye. “Hold this. It’s just a little cut under the brow. Probably a bone fragment, since your helm isn’t dented.”

Darnand snorted next to Jerric. He reached out and gripped Jerric’s shoulder. White light twinkled in front of Jerric’s open eye as Darnand healed him. Jerric shared a sheepish glance with Lildereth. “I guess real mages don’t carry little bandages,” Jerric remarked.

Lildereth darted off, so Jerric got out his canteen. He took a pull and passed it to Darnand. His friend looked like he could use a moment or two to finish collecting himself. Jerric took the time to check for surprise injuries and glance around at the chamber.

More of the small, bright crystals were fixed into the ceiling. Their aquamarine glow provided adequate light, but the atmosphere was eerie and uncomfortable. He found himself wondering more about the folk who first inhabited the space than about the ones they just evicted. He decided to ask before they got back to work. “What do you think they did here?”

Darnand cast a spell. Its green glow added to the sickly light. “This was their preparation chamber. Look here, the altar they used for enchanting. It appears to be crafted from rubble. Those hooks on the wall are not Ayleid. From the stains, I expect they used them to make the bodies ready for their rituals.”

The new light showed Jerric a barrel holding torches. He lit one and held it out to the side. “No, I mean the Ayleids. Why did they put light stones in their drainage system? What are these large chambers for?”

Lildereth stepped into the torch’s warm light. “Your big cities have underground levels, for the functions that the citizens don’t want to see. Perhaps you learned that from the Ayleids. I imagine these passages were like highways for the slaves, and maybe work and dwelling places. Who can know? I found the necromancers’ entrance. A hand-dug tunnel, concealed under bushes from the outside. That stone passage leads to a cave-in. They must have come in through the sewer the first time, like we did.”

Jerric tried to think like a necromancer. “Those fetchers in the robes didn’t look much like diggers. We met the tunnel makers in the zombie chamber, I’d wager. Three bedrolls for four corpse pirates. Unless those two mer were humping, I’d say we’re through here. Though there could be another partner out somewhere.”

Lildereth nodded. “Let’s go out through the surface tunnel. Jerric, do you need more time?”

“I want to look through the weapons in here, there was a silver mace that caught my eye. I’ll roll up what we want to keep into some of their blankets. Didn’t think to bring an extra pack. I’ll cache the rest for later. Don’t want to leave weapons lying around. Most of it’s not worth the weight to carry for what Morvayn would give us, but the Anvil militia might have a use for some of it. If you two agree. Won’t take me long.”

Her eyes went to Darnand.

“I saw some things in their living quarters that I should like to examine,” Darnand said. “Additionally, I will need some time with the remains.”

Jerric took a moment to scrutinize his friend. Darnand still looked tense, but calm. No signs of the shakes that had overtaken him after the mage attack on the Gold Road. He was in control this whole time, Jerric realized. I guess that’s important to him.

Lildereth gave another sharp nod. “Jerric, I’ll watch the exit while you do your work. I’ll go help Darnand finish when you get back here, you can stand watch then. Darnand, I’ll give you a hand if they’ve locked anything. Sound like a plan?”

“Indeed,” said Darnand. “As we leave, I shall ignite their furnishings.”

Jerric remembered Lildereth’s face when she had drawn one of the skeletons away from him. She had acted decisively despite her fear. He wished he had the words to tell her. “Yeah,” he said.

They finished their tasks with brisk efficiency. Jerric thought they all must be ready to breathe some fresh air. The mace he found was made of Nordic silver. Holding it felt like finding something he had lost. He wanted Morvayn to take a look at it, but he knew it would be his. He felt a smile crease his face as he tucked it into his belt.

Darnand set the pace back over the dunes to Anvil, since he was the least conditioned to walking with a burden. Between Jerric’s brawn, Lildereth’s feather spell, and Darnand augmenting his strength with a spell, they managed to carry all of the day’s spoils.

Jerric tried not to think about the sodden weight of zombie meat in his pack. He couldn’t shake the idea that what he was carrying deserved a burial, not a mortar and pestle. At least the light wind kept most of the smell behind them. His stomach was unsettled, the pangs of urgent hunger battling with trickles of nausea.

The sun glowed low and cold in the west, and the sea breeze carried a winter bite. A hot bath and a roaring fire would be welcome, Jerric thought. Sadly, his spare clothing was all back at his hut. He decided he could settle for a cold swim and the cozy blaze his fireplace would allow. North Winds Prayer is tomorrow, he remembered. There would be feasting after the chapel services, and bonfires on the beach. And Abiene. Hopefully, he would see Abiene. His heart beat faster at the thought of her.

Lildereth walked beside Jerric. “I could murder a pile of biscuits,” Jerric remarked to her, while his gut was feeling optimistic. “Soft, fluffy ones. Not those flakey rolled biscuits like they make in Skingrad.”

Lildereth swept him with an exaggerated glance. “That’s funny. The white-gold tower of death and destruction, talking about fluffy biscuits.”

“I’m all that of safety and protection, if you’re on the right side of my shield.” Jerric realized something. “Are you calling me pale? That’s a little unkind. Not everyone is blessed to toast in the sun.”

Lildereth answered with another green glance.

“Anyway,” Jerric continued, “You know what thought makes me shrivel? An arrow shot from the dark.” For a moment Lildereth’s face was inscrutable. Then she smiled. Jerric grinned to himself. “Biscuits with a slice of ham, or with honey. I can’t decide.”

This post has been edited by Grits: Jun 30 2011, 03:54 AM

[mALX]

Once again Jerric's appetite makes a timely showing to cut the tensions of battle - even mixed with nausea it prevails, ROFL !!!! Darnand continues to develop as an asset in the battlefield - not sure why that continues to surprise me !! Lol, but I like that side of him that emerges. Awesome Write !!!

[Acadian]

'One hit can break your bones, and that’s very distracting. '
Actually, the full context of Jerric's advice to Darnand was very good. This one piece elicited a chuckle though. Very Jerric!

'Darnand’s skeleton followed Slim at a lurching run.'
I see the author's careful observations of game skellies paid off here this simple but highly effective description.

“I guess real mages don’t carry little bandages,” Jerric remarked.'
Heh, Lildereth can dish it out. Nice to see that Jerric is testing to see if she can take it.

'Jerric remembered Lildereth’s face when she had drawn one of the skeletons away from him. She had acted decisively despite her fear. He wished he had the words to tell her.'
Very insightful, Jerric. Buffy would describe what you observed as 'Courage is action in the presence of fear.' Jerric, in his adorable eloquence described it just as well:
“Yeah,” he said.'

'The mace he found was made of Nordic silver. Holding it felt like finding something he had lost. He wanted Morvayn to take a look at it, but he knew it would be his. He felt a smile crease his face as he tucked it into his belt. '
This little passage is beautifully written.

Now, I like Darnand and he has proven his friendship to Jerric. Is it just me or is there perhaps more to his consistent interest in things necromantic that he tries to avoid discussing? I wonder if I'm onto something or simply seeing shadows.

Well. Jerric's little band doing a rehearsal run was a great idea. I think they will fare much better at Fort Strand as a result. Hopefully, Jerric will give his crew a brief respite to retrofit and grab himself some biscuits and Abiene.

[ghastley]

Jerric's a bit fussy about his weapons, isn't he? The axe was too sharp, getting stuck in the skeleton's leg. Then the iron mace was too heavy. Let's hope the silver mace (which had a blue glow, but didn't seem to do anything as it clipped his shield?) is the "Goldilocks" one.

He found it hard to judge distance when his enemy was emanating a pinkish glow. I liked this bit of game mechanics. The enchantments aren't always positive, and knowing when to hold 'em, and when to fold 'em, is an important part of adventuring.

And now everyone in the party has shown the others how they can shine. Remind me what they're rehearsing for?