The Famous Five, Heroes and Villains of the Age of Martin Septim Options

[Ceidwad]

Welcome to my fanfic. I've been planning on posting this up for some time now. Now that I have the first 10,000 words or so down seperately, I feel ready to post some stuff up here. I hope you will all enjoy reading it as it develops. I haven't a clue how much I will write eventually, if I manage to finish it. But it will likely be very, very long. Indeed, there's an excellent chance that I'll finish writing a Skyrim fan fiction before (if) I finish this!

The Famous Five is an unusual fan fiction. It takes the form of a historical commentary/synthesised text written some 90 years after the events of Oblivion, and relies rather heavily on my own creative license to fill in some historical gaps in between 4E2, when the stories end, and 4E85 when the book is written (I should add, I have not read any Elder-Scrolls related lore works, such as the Infernal City).

This work weaves together the stories of five different characters that I roleplayed in Oblivion, and I hope to include some of my minor characters in it too. Subject to approval, it may also be nice to include some other chorrol.com members' fanfic characters in it too. It would be entertaining to see the outcome of a meeting between Luther Martinus (who you will get to know) and, say, Buffy or Teresa, for certain!

At present, I regrettably do not have screenshots; however, I hope to add some in future if and when I can get Oblivion for PC.

This is my first attempt at writing a fan fiction. I have thought about it for a while, though. I welcome critique of my writing as well as positive comments. I have not planned most of the fanfic, but have a general plan of how it will pan out. It will include actual in-game events, relationships and quests which inspired my roleplaying, and be supplemented with whatever ideas take my fancy at the time of writing.

Below is the prologue and the first entry. I plan to update every few days to a week, depending on how much I can write. This will vary. At times, I may not update for a while. I do, however, hope to persevere with this and update pretty regularly.

Happy reading!

This post has been edited by Ceidwad: Mar 26 2011, 05:00 AM

[Ceidwad]

PROLOGUE

Evening Star 28, 4E85 - Bruma - a young, wide-eyed Nord named Hjallfred Skrollsen excitedly opens his copy of the new book by Harald Steel-Quill. It contains accounts of the lives of five legendary historical figures who lived around the time of Martin Septim, for some the greatest of all the Septims. Sitting in the dining hall of the Bruma Mages Guild, destroyed and rebuilt about this time, he feels the leather cover of the book and begins to read, as alert as can be, even though it is late and a nearby candle slowly burns the midnight oil....

* * *

INTRODUCTION

Children of Bruma, Skyrim, and the world of Tamriel beyond, I am Harald Steel-Quill, a humble Nord scholar. It is my great pleasure and joy to reproduce this volume, which contains writings from the very pens of some of the bravest heroes, most valiant heroines, and most powerful champions - as well as some of the most dastardly villains - who lived during this defining epoch of the history of Cyrodiil.

The historical accuracy of the accounts of the five figures I provide is subject to some debate. In addition to their stories, I add my scholarly opinion on them, although I take care not to break up the flow of events too much, and will attempt to keep my passions to one side as much as possible.

Although this is the first book to combine all five figures together, some work has been done with individual texts. Of these, the memoirs of Luther Martinus, the one-time Champion of Cyrodiil, are by far the most popular, and have been reproduced numerous times sympathetically by Imperial historians since 4E64, when Ida Ottus published a glowing tribute in memory of his life, adding her own thoughts to Martinus' in a large volume.

Martinus' account is not based on his journals from the time of his travels, fragments of which were discovered hidden in the library in Cloud Ruler Temple's (now unused) halls in 4E62, the year after his death. They were, on the contrary, written in the early Fourth Era, when political tensions were on the rise and the provinces were daring to talk of secession with no emperor in place to command their obedience. Martinus blames much of this on the Cyrodilic arms of the Mages'’Guild, for failing to support his short-lived and failed initiatives to stamp out daedra worship in Cyrodiil, promote recruitment for the Imperial Legion, and unite the Imperial population in Cyrodiil behind the Nine Divines as measures to combat separatism from the provinces, where the Chapel is often notoriously weak. In areas where Martinus' account is, in my view, grossly misleading, I state this and give reasons outlining why I think this.

I should state at this point that, for those Imperials reading this who would view my words as an attack on the great man, who rightly continues to be much revered throughout Cyrodiil and all Tamriel, and whose statue still stands not far from my home here in Bruma, that this is not my intention. But, he is not some infallible god. His words must have the same value as any other's, for the scholar.

As a further scholarly point, although Martinus is sometimes vague about dates and in undoubtedly somewhat biased, his memory (or perhaps imagination) is excellent, and he leaves us an account of his great feats that almost matches in detail that of the next most popular figure.

The Arch-Mage Gwenyan's diaries are a priceless historical resource. Written no more than a day or two after the events they describe in virtually every instance, and brilliantly preserved in the Mages' Guild's Mystic Archives, they give a window into her views as they were at the time. Hers is also written more eloquently and in greater detail than any of the other five protagonists I profile here, and her sharp memory recalls a stunningly high level of detail even when her accounts are written a couple of days after the events. In certain cases, she is a better and more trustworthy source for overlapping events than Martinus, and she can be used to show examples of the weaknesses of his Memoirs. She talks about her journeys and relationships in Cyrodiil. Occasionally, she crosses paths with Martinus, and although she reports that their meeting in 3E433 was cordial, Martinus says otherwise. The two disagree irrevocably over Martinus' initiatives in 4E2, as official records and the views of those present testify to.

The illiterate Berrick, a Fighters' Guild mercenary and soldier, also tells us his stories through a man called Azzan, who has written them down (months after the end of the Oblivion Crisis, while the political atmosphere was still one of relief rather than the provincial strife of later years). These have been preserved in the Anvil Fighters Guild library, and passed down to subsequent Guildmasters. The courageous Redguard is known to have fought alongside Luther Martinus at Kvatch, and earns praise from the Champion in the latter's Memoirs. He also describes other battles with a dangerous organisation known as the Blackwood Company, which, if Fighters' Guild and Black Horse Courier references from the period are to be believed, we can but be thankful are no longer with us.

This present work also presents the writings of a Breton thief named 'Marie le Belle' (real name: Marie Elena Motierre). She is not a key historical player in the sense that the above figures are, and her story is mostly unrelated to those of the figures given above, save for one instance, mentioned in both hers and Gwenyan's writings, where she apparently stole a very powerful staff from the Arcane University. She is, however, something of a cult hero in the Waterfront District of the Imperial City, where she was admired and loved by many poor citizens. Songs of 'Golden Marie' continue to ring out in this neighbourhood down to this day. My book will show that, in truth, rather than the kind, merciful girl of legend, she was at best selfish, and at worst, manipulative and rather vindictive. Her writings were found by a member of the Chorrol Mages' Guild who bought the Motierres' family home in Chorrol in 4E33 and donated the writings to the Imperial Library. Not much has been done to popularise them, however. 'le Belle' writes in the form of a diary, which she updates every few days, and contains much of interest.

Of the last figure that I describe, I have little positive to say. I would say much that is negative, save for the fact that it is unnecessary to do so, as his 'memories', recorded by him as the events occurred and kept in the abominable Dark Brotherhood Sanctuary in Cheydinhal until found at a crime scene just two years ago, for unknown reasons - incriminate him entirely. It is believed that he disappeared years ago, last seen sometime around 4E2, although no-one knows where he went. He is also an infrequent writer, and seems to have long gaps where his absence of self-reported activity is baffling, as he has never been conclusively pinned down, nor arrested - indeed the discovery of his diaries solved a number of long-standing murder cases that had previously stumped the Imperial Legion, including the death of a man named Baenlin here in Bruma. According to his diary, he did not even spare his own 'family' in the Cheydinhal sanctuary and he 'took as much pleasure in killing them, as he did any other - their blood is as bountiful as that of any who has been called to their fate by Sithis.'

Our account begins with the story of Gwenyan - the future Arch-Mage of the Mages Guild, for now a humble student of magic.

* * *

LIST OF HISTORICAL FIGURES IN THIS WORK

Luther Martinus, Imperial. b. Skingrad, Cyrodiil, 3E400 d. Skingrad, Cyrodiil, 4E61 (age 94)
Gwenyan, Altmer. b. Alinor, Summerset Isle, 3E343 (age at time of writing: 176)
Berrick, Redguard. b. Hammerfell, 3E410 d. Anvil, Cyrodiil, 4E23 (age 47)
Marie le Belle, Breton. b. High Rock, 3E415 d. Imperial City 4E2 (age 20)
Fenrir Darkblade, Dunmer. Age and date of birth unknown. It is unclear if he is still alive, as he has not been seen or heard from since 4E2. Dunmer have a significant lifespan - several hundred years in some cases - and it is quite possible he is still alive somewhere.

This post has been edited by Ceidwad: Mar 26 2011, 09:05 PM

[Ceidwad]

First Seed 7, 3E430 – 10 A.M. – The White Rose flagship – en route between Alinor, Summerset Isle, and Anvil, Cyrodiil……

The White Rose is gently rocking back and forth over the waves, as I think about what I am leaving behind – a tremendous civilisation, with the greatest mastery in magicka in all the Empire. And where I am going. To Cyrodiil, the home of White Gold Tower. What a landmark! I am both excited to visit a new place and sad at leaving my home.

On the ship is a motley group of travellers, mostly fellow Altmer, of various classes. Seamen reside on the bottom deck for free, and travelling merchants and casual holidayers on the middle deck, where beds of basic quality may be found, as opposed to the filthy bedrolls the seamen must endure. They pay, as I found out from a struggling alchemist named Morwen, some 20 septims for their journey, not including food which they must buy themselves. It is an outrage that the sea captains can get away with this! I am presently on the upper deck, which cost 100 septims to reserve a bed in.

In my pouch I now carry with me some 200 gold. I wonder how far that will get me in Cyrodiil? It is said that many merchants in the Imperial City are so canny as to persuade you to buy a second-hand pair of rough leather shoes for 10 gold septims! Such was the story from Morwen, anyway. I recall her weathered appearance – she dressed smartly, as all merchants must to exude credibility and respectability – but in a rather basic brown shirt and tan linen skirt. Her coinpurse did not jingle very loudly, and her middle-aged face seemed creased as if as a result of the tough negotiations she went through daily to make ends meet. She carried a few basic potions to sell, plus her alchemical equipment. I would hazard a guess that she is around 300, about halfway through an Altmer’s typical lifespan, but her face looks much older. To tell the truth, I did feel sorry for her. Certainly, I cannot understand her situation – our family has always done well for ourselves, for all the 87 years I have been on Nirn. My coinpurse, at least, will be topped up by payments from my parents, deposited into an account in the Office of Imperial Commerce regularly.

This is an account of my voyage thus far into Cyrodiil, from my home in Alinor, which began yesterday and which will, if Azura wills it, land me safely in Anvil by tomorrow morning. I feel nervous and apprehensive about my journey, and do not know what will come of it. Yet, it is what I have to do. My parents are great healers, as I wish to be, and yet both had to overcome hardship to reach their positions in the royal court in Alinor. My father, as he often told me, had to move from Firsthold, on the other side of the Isle to take up his apprenticeship, at great cost and risk to himself, as he was not wealthy. Living outside Summerset Isle, perhaps, is the price I will have to pay for my future prosperity, as did my father. I shall miss it.

[Thomas Kaira]

Interesting idea, using a scholarly account of five figures to tell the story of Oblivion's five major questlines. I can see right through the looking glass, though, don't think for one second I know what you're doing in the background!

I like the direction you are taking so far, and will return as frequently as I can to see the Oblivion Crisis from your eyes.

I hope to see more from you very soon! I am most intrigued, and I like what I see so far!

I do have a few suggestions for your writing:

I would recommend italicizing your first paragraph (or something else) to better differentiate that it is not a part of the book that you are penning here.

I'm noticing your sentence lengths are quite long in many areas, sometimes taking up half of your paragraphs. A couple examples (I have bolded my edits):

Evening Star 28, 4E85 – Bruma – a young, wide-eyed Nord named Hjallfred Skrollsen excitedly opens his copy of the new book by Harald Steel-Quill{.} It contains accounts of the lives of five legendary historical figures who lived around the time of Martin Septim, for some the greatest of all the Septims.

This sentence can easily be split in two where I have indicated.

Martinus’ account is not based on his journals from the time of his travels, fragments of which were discovered hidden in the library in Cloud Ruler Temple’s (now unused) halls in 4E62, the year after his death{.} They were written in the early Fourth Era, when political tensions were on the rise and the provinces were daring to talk of secession with no emperor in place to command their obedience.

Again here, this sentence can be very easily separated at this point. The reason you don't want sentences to be too long is because too many commas makes the sentence feel like it is rambling. I understand that many published authors like to use lengthy sentences, but they like to keep a diverse usage of punctuation in them. Using only commas in a sentence four lines long is not very graceful or interesting to the reader.

(months after the end of the Oblivion Crisis, while the political atmosphere was still one of relief rather than the provincial strife of later years)

If the selection inside the parentheses is this long, it's a better idea just to leave the parentheses out altogether. Try and limit yourself to five to eight word inside of parentheses. General guideline: if you need punctuation for your parenthetical selection, it's too long.

[mALX]

Your idea of doing this as a historical text is fascinating and inspired !! The background for each of the "Five" - well done and intriguing, as is the beginning chapter for the Arch Mage - can't wait to read more!! Great Write !!

[Destri Melarg]

I agree. This is an interesting premise on which to base a fan-fic. I think you have made an excellent start and I will be watching to see how this one progresses.

A few suggestions:

The Prologue of your story is the single paragraph in which you introduce Hjallfred Skrollsen. The second paragraph, which begins the body of the book penned by Harald Steel-Quill (great name, BTW) should carry the title Introduction to give the book a more scholarly feel.

In that opening paragraph (the Prologue) you state that Hjallfred is ‘Sitting in the dining hall of the Bruma Mages Guild, destroyed and rebuilt about this time,’. Since the time of his reading is the end of 4E 85, we are led to believe from that sentence that the Bruma Mages Guild was ‘destroyed and rebuilt’ in 4E 85. If this is your intent then no worries, but if you are referring to the destruction of the Bruma Guild during the time of the Oblivion Crisis then you need to be a bit more specific with the time frame:

Of these, the memoirs of Luther Martinus, the one-time Champion of Cyrodiil, are by far the most popular, and have been reproduced numerous times sympathetically by historians since 4E64, when Ida Ottus published a glowing tribute in memory of his life, adding her own thoughts to Martinus’ in a large volume.

This sentence could use some work. First thing you should do is break it down into multiple sentences. As a rule I don’t like to re-write other people’s work, but if you would indulge me for a moment:

Of these, the Memoirs of Luther Martinus, the one time Champion of Cyrodiil, are by far the most popular.
- Here we keep your opening exactly as you wrote it. However, we use italics to turn Memoirs into an actual book, underscoring its popularity.

It has been reproduced numerous times by historians, who have always treated the subject with the sympathy that attends hero worship.
- ‘sypathetically by historians since 4E64, when Ida . . .’ reads as if the book did not exist before 4E64. Ida Ottus’ glowing tribute may be considered the definitive work of scholarship on Luther Martinus, but she only added her thoughts to an existing memoir. You can also use this sentence to tie into the subsequent paragraph in which Harald takes to task those who think he is being negative toward the great man.

In the final sentence you should conclude with what exactly made Ida Ottus’ book different from the others that had come before. Did she humanize Martinus? Or was her ‘glowing tribute’ somehow considered heresy for its time?

An interesting dilemma is raised in the next paragraph. Martinus seems to blame the Mages Guild for failing to support his recruitment efforts on behalf of the Imperial Legion as well as his desire to convert everyone to worship of the Nine Divines. On the one hand it immediately raises the question of why the Mages Guild should care about who does and does not join the Legion. On the other hand, I can see that if the Mages Guild hoped to provide order in Cyrodiil after the collapse of the Septim Dynasty then they would have a vested interest in these things. I will trust that the reasons for Martinus’ animosity toward the Guild will be outlined in future chapters.

I like the way that you have maintained the professional, scholarly tone throughout the introduction. And Gwenyan’s first journal entry is interesting. I did sort of wince when you decided to make Berrick illiterate, but that is my own pet peeve and has nothing whatsoever to do with your work. Keep it up!

This post has been edited by Destri Melarg: Mar 26 2011, 08:05 PM

[Ceidwad]

Thank you for the responses so far. Some good suggestions - I agree with most of them and have implemented them.

I just wanted to reply to some of the points in your post, Destri. Some very pertinent points and I am glad you have brought them up.

You mention the date of the publication of Martinus' Memoirs by Ida Ottus, and ask about how it fits in to the historical picture of the memoirs. This is not totally set in stone for me, but the basic picture is sketched out and I hope to expand on it in some time.

I have it in my mind that Martinus writes the original memoirs near to the end of his life (circa 4E50 or so, although I haven't setled on that). Then, they are widely read by the population and recieve wide acclaim in pro-Imperial circles and cautious acceptance by others. Following that, Ida Ottus's version is produced in 4E64 - it is basically full of praise and romanticism, and little else - and other Imperial historians praise it and echo a sort of consensus.

In the next 20 years, some new things are discovered and analysed (for example, the diairies of my Arch-Mage, and maybe some contradictory evidence found in Cloud Ruler Temple) which leads to a shift of opinion among some, such as my writer Mr. Steel-Quill. Naturally, pro-Imperial historians dispute this evidence.

The next thing you ask about is the interaction of the Mages' Guild and Martinus in 4E2 in deciding the future course of Imperial policy. You are right, of course, that the Mages' Guild has no interest in who does or does not join the Imperial Legion. However, as you also allude to, the Mages' Guild has vested interests in maintaining order in Cyrodiil and Tamriel, and defending its own position and power (weakened, but by no means extinguished, in the battle with the Necromancers).

The confrontation between the two is basically over a strategic disagreement between two loose political coalitions, both roughly equal in strength, over how to handle the threat of provinces seceding with no strong Emporer to command authority.

One 'pro-Cyrodilic' party is led by Martinus, who, being the saviour of the Empire, becomes a focus of support through of sheer force of personality. This coalition includes some members of the Elder Council, the Chapel, the Imperial Legion and many Imperials in Cyrodiil. It stands for an aggressive promotion of Imperial culture and influence in all parts of the Empire but especially Cyrodiil, in the hopes that this will strengthen Cyrodiil internally so that it can militarily combat seperatism.

The other 'pro-Tamrielic' party favours an inclusive approach which sees such imperialism as being more likely to cause secession than prevent it. This coalition includes the Mages' Guild, who oppose the measures as being likely to lead to violence and fragmentation of the Empire, in addition to non-Imperial citizens of Cyrodiil, minority religious groups, and sympathetic Elder Councillors. The Mages' Guild, in my mind, also has many members sympathetic to the cultural and religious pluralism which the pro-Cyrodilic party would stamp out.

Essentially it's a clash of visions. I have not fully worked out the details but the plan is to end the book with a blow-by-blow description of a heated debate in the Elder Council Chambers in 4E2, where both 'parties' (including Gwenyan and Martinus on either side) argue their case and a vote is taken to democratically decide the strategy the Empire will follow. I do not yet know whether, and if so, how, High Chancellor Ocato may figure in this. There are also likely to be some unexpected occurances at the debate!

All this is a long way off, though. At present, I am still very early in the writing of Gwenyan's diaries. It will be some time before Martinus becomes involved in the drama. He mainly describes the events of the Oblivion Crisis, which is still a few years away. Note that, for the purposes of this fan fiction, certain events will be chronologically put a few years earlier than they actually occur in Oblivion - for instance, the Mages' Guild will undergo its struggle against the Necromancers from 3E431 to 3E432 instead of 3E433/434 as in the game. This is purely to make sense of anomalies; for instance, as I did not do the Main Quest with certain characters, the landscape had not changed with them, many characters were alive that died in the Main Quest, etc. Of course it is still not perfect, but it works best this way.

As far as Berrick's illiteracy is concerned, I'd like to make clear that it is because of his background, nothing to do with race. (I know you weren't implying this, but I'd like to make it clear nonetheless.) It is purely to give me a different and creative way of telling a story (telling it through Azzan), and Berrick, being someone who relies in life mostly on his athleticism and wit, rather than learning, seems the most natural of my characters to give this role to. Indeed, we may note that two of the finest wizards in the Mages Guild are Redguard, despite what Trayvond says about mages in Hammerfell!

Oh, and I hope to have dispelled a couple of racial stereotypes with my use of two Nordic scholars as a framing device. Alessia Ottus may have claimed that 'you should not expect to find any books [in Bruma], for Nords are ignorant and are not fond of learning'. But I hope that Mr. Skrollsen and Mr. Steel-Quill have posthumously proved her assertion wrong!

This post has been edited by Ceidwad: Mar 26 2011, 10:20 PM

[Acadian]

Welcome to the fanfic Arena! You have an interesting concept here.

The Magnificent Seven! Famous Five! I very much look forward to seeing how you present and move among your five characters.

Right now, I'm hoping to learn more about our Altmer hopeful healer on her voyage to Anvil.

This post has been edited by Acadian: Mar 27 2011, 02:09 AM

[SubRosa]

Forget the Fab Four, now we have the Famous Five!

This is an interesting and rarely used premise for a fiction, to write it as a historian. One thing I enjoyed seeing right up front as that the author openly admits that the memoirs written by some of the characters are not to be trusted. This is the kind of thing you see in IRL history books, especially when you are dealing with things like Caesar's Commentaries, etc...

I loved the name Marie le Belle (Marie Elena Motierre). Not only is it a wonderful use of the name of the pirate ship, but also a tie to Francois Motierre.

I see a interesting little nugget in the diary of our future Arch Mage as well. She is an Azurite. I guess those rumors were true about daedra worship becoming more prevalent in the Summerset Isles! A nice little bit of world-building there, and done so very lightly as many would not even consciously notice it.


nits:
Mages' Guild's Mystic Archives
There is no apostrophe in Mages Guild. The same with Fighters Guild. These threw me in the beginning too.

This post has been edited by SubRosa: Mar 27 2011, 02:40 AM

[Ceidwad]

My first round-up of comments! How exciting.

Thomas Kaira - Thank you for your suggestions. I agree with them and have changed the sentences, and will attempt to keep comments in parentheses more brief in future. It is a feature of my writing as it is my speech in real life - I do tend to ramble!

mALX - Thanks! I toyed the idea of the historical narrative for a while before settling on it. It won't surprise you to learn that I did History at university, and of course I love Oblivion too so it was natural the two thgs would come together I suppose.Hope you continue to enjoy it!

Acadian - It may interest you to know that The Famous Five is an actual name of a book series here in Britain. Initially, I wanted to call this fanfic The Chronicles of Cyrodiil, but felt that would be plagiarising Cardboard Box. I like it, anyhow. I plan to deal with the characters one at a time, generally speaking, so we will hear the whole of Gwen's story before we get to Mr. Martinus, Berrick, etc. However, our guide on this literary voyage, Mr. Steel-Quill, will occasionally make references to other characters' views in notable events where more than one character is concerned.

Destri - I hope my last post answered your queries, but thanks again for bringing them up!

SubRosa - You are a scholar to have read Caesar's Commentaries! And thank you for noticing my subtle reference to Gwen as a devotee of Azura. Marie has quite an interesting relationship to the pirate ship, as well as a somewhat less interesting relationship to the Motierre family - I will shed more light on these things in due course.

Below, Gwenyan continues her narrative of ship life, where she describes a meeting with a fellow mage during a stopover in High Rock.

First Seed 7, 3E430

6 P.M. - The White Rose

As I write, the weather is pleasant and has been good all day, as the sun sets on the horizon. The sound of birds chirping fills the air, and on the ship, people are in good cheer for the most part.

In the last few hours, I have met a charming young Breton named Robért Permane. He arrived on ship when it made a stopover at Daggerfall in his native High Rock. Quite handsome, too! He has long, flowing brown hair, deep brown eyes and smooth skin. He is also a scholar! I introduced myself to him when I saw him looking around, a little lost and shy, perhaps because of all the Altmer who towered over him. But once we started talking, I couldn’t get him to shut up.

We talked about a lot of things. He is a new Apprentice at the Arcane University; he specializes in Destruction and Conjuration. He loves history; he has read all of Stronach K’Thojj’s 4-volume Brief History of the Empire. He says he is reading The Real Barenziah now, and is on volume 3. We shared a joke about how, irrespective of which series was actually true, the series by Mero was a much more interesting version of the truth than Stern Gamboge’s dull-as-bucketwater version.

He showed me his apprentice’s robe. “Pure green and brown felt, that. Can’t ask for lighter material. Perfect for spellcasters. They’ve modified these ones to make them waterproof, too.” Looking at the robe, it was certainly good quality, although the colour seemed distinctly uninspiring compared to the brightly coloured robes normally worn by court mages in Alinor.

After we had talked, we played some Colovian poker to pass the time. Robért tried to cheat by magically altering one of the cards, so as to change it from an eight of emeralds to an Empr. Uriel Septim VII of sapphires, to complete a full house. But I caught him in the act and cast a dispel spell just in time. Oh, if only I could see his expression again. “There. Read them and weep”, he said, before realising that he had made a real boar’s ear of things. It was positively hilarious!

We are both getting off at Anvil. I’m sure I’ll see him tomorrow morning. He’s gone now. I don’t think he felt too great after the combination of ale, sweetrolls, and being embarrassed in such a way. In fact, he left looking a little pale in the face, and I’m sure he was heading for the nearest bucket. Oh well…….

[SubRosa]

Now that was a sweet little piece of regular life. Discussing which version of Barenziah's biography is more interesting, the card game, etc... This is just the sort of thing I can read all day long. Since Robert is also headed for the Arcane University, I get the feeling that he will become a feature in Gwenyan's life. Perhaps a big feature.

he had made a real boar’s ear of things
I love this saying!

This post has been edited by SubRosa: Mar 30 2011, 11:54 PM

[Thomas Kaira]

Transfiguring playing cards? Now there's a new twist on Poker! That was inspired.

Sounds like we have a couple partners-in-crime on the build. I wonder how far through the University they will go together?

[Acadian]

Much to like here!

I was delighted to hear that you intend to primarily focus on the story of one character at a time, bringing in references to others as may be appropriate. I so enjoy the ability to focus and linger on one character instead of moving among several too rapidly.

Based on your pacing and what was presented here, I am also just happy as can be to see that it seems you intend to linger and savor things along the way. With the kind of rich goodness you provided here, that makes me a happy koala.

'After we had talked, we played some Colovian poker to pass the time. Robért tried to cheat by magically altering one of the cards, so as to change it from an eight of emeralds to an Empr. Uriel Septim VII of sapphires, to complete a full house. But I caught him in the act and cast a dispel spell just in time. Oh, if only I could see his expression again. “There. Read them and weep”, he said, before realising that he had made a real boar’s ear of things. It was positively hilarious!'
This is positively magical! Not only is it fun and entertaining, it is such a delicious blend of the familiar dropped into a TES world. Not to mention it was superbly written and shows us much of the two characters involved.

This post has been edited by Acadian: Mar 31 2011, 02:16 AM

[Ceidwad]

SubRosa - Thanks. I liked the 'boar's ear' expression too. I assume boars are Cyrodiil's pigs; strangely, in-game there is plenty of ham but no actual domesticated pigs. (There are also no cows for all the beef)

Thomas Kaira - We will see the partners in crime together at the University later on, of that I am fairly certain. For now, they will split-up in Anvil, as we find out in the next chapter.

Acadian- That passage was inspired by some of the things I've read here. Mixing the TES world and our world gives us some interesting opportunities for fan fictions. Plus, it seems like these things should logically exist in Tamriel. The game shows characters working, sleeping, eating and drinking, but not much else. Really, that is one aspect of the game that could have been improved, to expand on the recreational side of life in Cyrodiil.

That chapter was unfortunately a bit short due to sequencing issues. Fortunately, we have a longer one this time! In this next clipping from Gwen's diary, we see the ship dock in Anvil, and oversee our mage's first day in Cyrodiil.

***

First Seed 8, 3E430 Anvil, Cyrodiil.

3 P.M.

The White Rose docked in Anvil this morning. I found Robért looking distinctly unwell, after the various travellers had gone their ways. His burgundy linen shirt looked somewhat soiled, but I didn't say anything. I recall his words though: "Thank Akatosh that's over."’That's all he said. He didn't look quite so handsome now, although there was still a faint glint in his eye.

After we went our ways and had promised to meet each other later in the Count's Arms, I went for a walk down by the seafront. Not the sort of place you would want to find yourself alone on a dark night, that much is for certain. Drunken sailors abounded, and there seemed to be a rather raucous boarding house called the Fo'c's'le where they gathered. The proprietor, whom I saw as she stepped out to shout at the sailors for their drunken disorderliness, seemed to have the same problem as poor Morwen. Her arms, hands and hair said she was about 30, but her face gave out that she was 50. In fact just about everyone here looks older than they should. I imagine they have all had difficult lives, just like Morwen. It certainly is not like the world I am used to; both my parents and I have always lived rather easy and sedentary lifestyles.

As I write this, I am sitting on a beautiful bench in the centre of Anvil, just near a little pond and a statue of a mermaid. Looking at my reflection in the water, I see a woman whose face suggests a life of ease. My long, satin blonde hair cascades down to my shoulders, touching the black and burgundy outfit I am currently wearing. My brown eyes are devoid of any signs of age. When I think about the pitiful lifespans of humans, I despair. I probably have another 220 years of relative youth to look forward to; they have to fit so much into the 60 years or so the gods give them. They have some 25 years in which to bear children. It is so unfair. Of course, we Altmer are rightly the recipients of greater lifespans than the lesser races, but it still moves me with pity to see human women struggle against their handicaps. What might-

8 P.M.

I was forced to stop my earlier entry. A nearby guard, named Langley, had been looking over my shoulder. At least, I think he had. Maybe it was just me thinking he was? Anyway, he was friendly enough when we got to talking. He told me that a lot of ships came in through Anvil. I asked him how I could get to the Imperial City from here. He replied that there were two options: walk, or use a horse. The roads were the best way, he said, as they were patrolled by legionnaires and lots of travellers also passed along them. Horses here are so expensive, though! 4,000 septims? I am sure the white mares are fine creatures, but unfortunately well beyond my budget. I shall have to walk.

I am now sipping wine in the Count's Arms. Robért looks much better now that he has changed his clothes. He is wearing his robes now. I must say, he looks rather dashing in them. Perhaps it's the three goblets of wine that I've consumed. We discussed travelling to the Imperial City together, but he says he wants to stay in Anvil for a while. "Plus," he said, "you'd probably take all my money from me at Colovian poker, anyway."

10 P.M.

I have just re-read my letter from Raminus Polus at the University.

Dear Gwenyan,

We are most pleased to welcome you to the Mages Guild here in Cyrodiil, following the enquiry of your father, Caliphar.

You will find our headquarters at the Arcane University in the Imperial City. Here you will find the finest magical facilities in the whole province, as well as many like-minded mages such as yourself. You will also find expert tutors who will be able to help you reach your utmost potential as a student of the arts magicka.

Should you be successful at the University, there is potential for a superb career with the guild.

We look forward to meeting you.

Yours,

Raminus Polus

Master-Wizard/Chief assistant to Arch-Mage Hannibal Traven

I can't wait to see it!

I have just counted my gold. I have a mere 189 septims left.

This post has been edited by Ceidwad: Apr 17 2011, 02:52 AM

[SubRosa]

Poor Robért! At least as he said, it is all over now! You gave me a great smile with Gwen's description of the poor Breton.

I loved Gwen's moment of reflection in the pond. You show us so much about her. Not only her own appearance, but most especially her feelings of sympathy for the shorter-lived races (this is something the game ignores completely, but in reality the vast differences in life-spans would put huge barriers between elves and humans). You even allowed a trace of that Altmer haughtiness creep in!

For a moment I read this:
Master-Wizard/Chief assistant
and thought Chef assistant! I blame Thomas Kaira!

Again, a very enjoyable episode of the Fab Five. I look forward to seeing more!


nits:
Purely a flavor based comment, and feel perfectly in your rights to ignore it. Numbers in print often look better when they are spelled out as words, rather than put in numerals. Twenty five instead of 25.

but it still moves me with pity to see human women struggle against their handicaps. What might
You missed something at the end here, after What might.

This post has been edited by SubRosa: Apr 4 2011, 01:11 AM

[Acadian]

Like SubRosa, I thoroughly enjoyed Gwen's perspective on elves versus those. . . lesser races. She oozes Altmer, but by showing us her perspective, you allow her to wear it as naturally as that black and burgandy outfit.

I also quite like that she has been accepted directly into the University. Whether this is due purely to her family connection or her mage status in her homeland, either way it seems perfect for her story.

I must confess that as a character-driven fiction fan, I was a tad concerned we might be off on a historical study moving too quickly among characters to get to know them. However, if what you present so far is any indication, I can tell you I'm going to love this!

[Ceidwad]

SubRosa - Thanks for your comments. I often find that, as I go back and read over my work, I add more little reflections and thoughts like that which did not occur to me the first time I wrote the passage. Although the age difference is a theme that I have planned and will occur irregularly but often in Gwen's thoughts.

Incidentally, 'What might' wasn't strictly meant to be a complete sentence - she is being interrupted by Langley and loses her train of thought when she returns to the journal. That's how it was meant to appear anyway!

Acadian - Do watch this space with regard to Gwen's university career. Just between you and me, there may be a little twist in the tale coming soon. I am glad you are enjoying the fan fiction so far. I have taken your comments to heart and am trying to continue to include as much of our writer's thoughts as possible, to keep it from being dull and predictable.

Next up: Gwen begins to make her way to the Imperial City, but not without a hitch along the way....

***

First Seed 10, 3E430 – West Weald Inn, Skingrad

11 A.M.

I am in shock. I have just arrived in the safety of a town called Skingrad, where I have finally been able to find an inkwell and quill, but what a journey I have had! I was almost seriously injured yesterday, but it turned out alright, thank Azura. This is what happened.

The path out of Anvil brought me to a crazy Khajiit; he called himself ‘Mai’q the Liar’ and the guards nearby told me not to bother; they had already tried, and failed, to get any sense out of him. When I walked past him, he rambled some nonsense, then ran past me at the speed of lightning.

The path continued fairly uneventfully; a couple of travellers rode past on their horses and greeted me. Then, out of nowhere, a thuggish beast who I guessed to be another Khajiit accosted me. Equipped with a warhammer, I certainly wasn’t going to argue with him and dropped some gold on the ground.

Not satisfied with this, he said “All of it, this one wants. Now.” But I needed the money to survive until I reached the Imperial City and that fat deposit, so I tried to run away, my coinpurse jingling loudly, my long legs pumping as fast as they could, but alas, rather slowly, my great strides being the only thing keeping me ahead. I could feel him catching me, as the swings of his giant hammer at one point got close enough to disturb the air behind my back. Terrified, I ran even faster, doing all I could to avoid being crushed by it.

Just as I felt I was about to run out of breath, and with the Khajiit still close enough for me to hear him cursing: “DIE, damn you!”, I heard the clank of heavy armour nearby. A grey-suited figure came to my aid, shouting: “You dare oppose the might…..of the IMPERIAL LEGION?!”. I guess this was one of the legionnaires that Langley had told me about. He impressively parried the warhammer with his shield, which stunned the Khajiit. Following through with his longsword, he cleaved through the Khajiit’s leather armour like a hot knife through butter. The Khajiit yelped in pain and dropped his hammer, upon which the grey-suited colossus finished off the beast with two long strokes of his blade.

When I had recovered my breath, the figure was standing over me. I lifted my head and gave him my sincere gratitude. Then I noticed his shield arm had been nastily dislocated. The Legion soldier had been either too brave or too stupid to notice this during the battle, but had now dropped his shield and was holding the arm gingerly.

With this, I offered to heal him. It wasn’t easy. A dislocation like this, or a limb break, needed several Convalescence spells to recover from properly, and I didn’t know anything more powerful. By the time I was finished, I was drained.

He searched the body of the Khajiit and said: “It would seem you weren’t his first victim this week. Look at all this gold……550 septims! Well, I think that, since you healed me, it’s only right we should split it halfways.” Frankly, I felt fortunate simply at not being a bloody pulp, but I gratefully accepted. Moreover, the Legion soldier even escorted me back to the gold I had dropped before, and then to the relative safety of the Gottshaw Inn nearby, where I was able to get a meal and a room.

I cannot relate in words just how terrified I was at the time. I had never had to deal with such a situation before, and I still shudder to think how close I came to ending my life prematurely. Of course, it didn’t matter to Khajiit – their lives being even more pitifully short than humans, and having five or six children at a time – why wouldn’t they take a chance in combat? That cat-man probably cared not a jot that he had a chance of dying, when his life was destined to be so short anyway. Anyway, I have survived. That is all that matters.

The following morning, I did not leave the safety of the inn until I saw a legionnaire trotting past on his horse. I asked him if he would escort me to Skingrad, and he agreed to do so, saying: “We’re here to serve, citizen”.

I am now upstairs in the guest room, in the West Weald Inn, Skingrad. The room cost 20 precious gold, but it is worth it. It’s the first place in Cyrodiil where I’ve felt really at home. There is a nice room with a wardrobe, desk, chair, and a beautiful bed decked out in red and gold trim. The Count’s Arms had a similar bed, but the room was rather bare and the proprietor stared at me a lot. The Gottshaw Inn, meanwhile, had a friendly proprietor named Foroch, an amiable little Bosmer, but the bed was substandard. I rather like this place. I think I shall stay here a while. Most of all, I will be safe here, thank Azura.

This post has been edited by Ceidwad: Apr 9 2011, 04:16 AM

[SubRosa]

For the "What might", add a trailing dash like so: "What might-" to the end of the sentence. That will show that it was interrupted.

grey-suited colossus
A lovely description of a legionary.

Once again, I loved the subtle racism on the part of Gwen as she reflected on how naturally a Khajiit (or as she once referred to him - beast) would have no regard for their life. This is an excellent way of portraying someone bred in Summerset, the hoityest, toitest place in Tamriel.

[Acadian]

I so enjoyed this delightful episode!

I agree with SubRosa how cleverly you weave in Gwen's racial superiority. The beastly cat people with their pitifully short lives dropping litters of replacements at a time. The Imperial - stupid enough to be brave. The amiable little Bosmer that one would pat on the head like a puppy perhaps. And all of this flows so gently and naturally from Gwen. How could one not love her despite this? Quite the talent for her you have and I was smiling all the way through this episode!

An exciting chase and rescue! By Mara, gotta love those Legion soldiers! And Gwen is clever enough to secure her own escort to the safety of Skingrad. Another soldier or two and she will be safely in the IC, I hope.

[Ceidwad]

Acadian - Thanks for your observations on our gal's casual racism. It will be one of the themes of the early part of her diary, although she will evolve. The thing to remember is that her ignorance of other races is not indicative of any genuine prejudice, merely her biased beliefs which, let's face it, most Altmer share, and why wouldn't they, given their obvious mental brilliance?

SubRosa - again, thanks for observing the hoity-toitiness of the mage student, and for your other comments. And thanks for reading and commenting freqeuntly. The reason I wrote 'What might' without a dash following it was because it seemed more natural (if writing a diary, you probably wouldn't anticipate beng interrupted). Although I realise now it had the potential for confusion. Agreed and amended.

Well, Gwen didn't have such an easy ride from Anvil to Skingrad, did she? Let's see how she gets on on the journey from Skingrad to the Imperial City, which spans a couple of days.

***

First Seed 13, 3E430

4 P.M.

I have just barely recovered from my scare the other day. Skingrad is a wonderful town, with friendly residents. My hotel room provides all the comforts of home, but it isn’t cheap. Sadly, I shall have to leave tomorrow.

I visited the Mages’ Guild on my first day here, which was a Sundas, so all the mages were off duty and enjoying a good meal and fine wine. I spoke to the mages there and showed them my letter from Raminus. Then I told them about about my run-in with the highwayman. One mage, who introduced himself as Sulinus Vassinus, gave the following advice: next time this happened, a nice big fireball was the best response.
I replied that my destruction skills were not quite up to scratch. Showing him, I summoned up the largest fireball I could. It was little bigger than an apple.

“I see.” said Vassinus. “So maybe you aren’t a ‘blowing things up’ type of mage. Try going invisible, instead.”
When I explained I couldn’t do this either, but was quite good at Restoration, Alteration and Mysticism, he said: “Ah, don’t worry. They’ll teach you well at the University. If you can get there.”

I didn’t understand what he meant by that. The other mages re-assured me. A tall, yet soft-spoken Nord named Vigge told me that his first experiments at the university inevitably ended in him blowing something up……and not in a good way. He laughed and said, “you’d have to be pretty incompetent to get dismissed from the University. After all, if a joke like Jeanne Frasoric can make Wizard rank, why……you should be Arch-Mage in no time.”* I am not so sure I will be Arch-Mage, but forging a respectable career at the University is my goal in the next 20 years. It is a relief to be re-assured.

*Editor’s note: I have singled out this comment because it is remarkably incidental, prophetic even, given the actual later meteoric rise of the diary’s author, who, from becoming an Apprentice in 3E430, achieved Wizard rank in 3E431 and became Arch-Mage in 3E432. The progression usually takes a lifetime, although in this case was undoubtedly influenced by the unusual circumstances in which the Mages Guild found itself at the time of the High Elf’s appointment as Arch-Mage.

Having met with the mages on Sundas, I spent the Morndas and Tirdas exploring the town. Skingrad’s chapel and castle stood out as landmarks. The chapel looks functional and imposing rather than beautiful, although the stained-glass windows are delightful. The castle is another thing altogether – fine gothic architecture and beautifully dressed servants. I wonder who the ruler is in these parts? I know Cyrodiil is governed locally by counts, but the count here was absent. His servants and guardsmen seemed polite though, with one exception. One middle-aged Imperial, dressed in green brocade. As my eyes met his, I felt I was able to detect coldness in them. That hardly mattered, however. I survived a savage attack a mere two days ago. A mere look was the least of my worries.

Tirdas was a day spent outside. Skingrad has a great variety of wild fruit. The vineyards here are accompanied by a tomato field and several blackberry and strawberry bushes. I imagine this would be a nice place to live.

I wonder what I will find on the road tomorrow? No more highwaymen, I hope. Looking at my map, I can see I am about halfway to the Imperial City. The journey should take one day or so.

I have counted my gold; I now have 322 gold septims.

First Seed 14, 3E430 – Wawnet Inn, near Imperial City

I arrived safely near the Imperial City and am presently lodged in a tavern known as the Wawnet Inn. Too exhausted to write any more.

First Seed 15, 3E430

9 A.M.

I feel refreshed this morning. The Wawnet Inn is basic, but the view out onto the countryside is beautiful. Yesterday’s journey saw me safely from Skingrad to the Imperial City without incident. On the way, I stopped at a little village named Pell’s Gate. The people there kindly offered to make me a meal, for a small consideration. I still have 276 septims remaining. About 35 septims were lost on dinner last night. Wawnet Inn offers roast boar meat for a reasonable 25 gold. I have spent the last few days eating common mutton. This is simply no good! A bottle of wine washed it down. The publican here is a wine connoisseur, and shared some tips for drinking it with me. I must admit that while Cyrodiil’s wines are no match for the finest Summurset wines, they are good. I shall leave for the big city now!