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> A Thief's Ascension, The story of Jak's life from small beginnings
BretonBlood
post Jun 19 2016, 04:11 AM
Post #1


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Joined: 9-March 15



I am by no means a writer, in fact I am horrible but figured I'd post a story I wrote on the Bethesda Forums here. I fully expect to be picked apart for my bad writing, this was also written about 2 years ago. I also like to include pictures to somewhat show what is going on since it kind of helps take away some of the burden of creating the scene through writing.

Chapter 1


"Oh wait, aren't you going to eat something before you go to work?"

"I can't I slept in, sorry mom." Jak said as he quickly rushed out the door to head to the Riften Docks.

Once at the docks Jak got to work quickly with the daily chores he was assigned when he got the job. Luckily he had been doing it for so long that even starting late he could get his work done in time, and after a few hours he took a break to relax watching the lake. It was peaceful for awhile until...

"Hey Jak! What are you doing?" The young Breton came up from behind and sat down beside Jak.

"Hello, Fina..." She stretched her legs out across his lap. "Alright then... well I am on my break, I got all my stuff done and before I get back to work I wanted to relax over the lake."

"Oh, that sounds like fun, I mean I can't imagine working here is all that fun."

"It isn't bad, it can get boring but it pays okay. Plus I get to rest here every now and then and take in the view and fresh air."

"It is beautiful, isn't it? "

"So what are you doing here, Fina?"

"I don't have anything to do since I haven't gotten any jobs from the Jarl or anyone, so I decided I would come see you today."

"Lucky me." Jak smirked and Fina smacked his arm.

Jak eventually stood up and explained he had to get back to work, so Fina hugged him and said good bye. Once the sun began set Jak finished up his remaining work, and headed home where his mother cooked a meal while he recovered from another day of working for the Riften Fishery.

As usual Jak worked a long day at the Riften Fishery and decided to go to the Bee and Barb for an afternoon drink. He sat the bar drinking several mugs of mead trying to take the edge off.

"By the gods, Fina? Is that you?"

"Marc?"

"That's right. Wow it has been years, what are you doing in Riften?"

"I live here, in fact I just got back from a job the jarl gave me to go take care some smugglers. What about you?"

"I have been travelling Skyrim looking for potential patrons, and ended up here. It is great to see you, want to get a drink?"

"Umm, sure." Fina and Marcurio headed to the bar to order some mead when Fina noticed Jak sitting at the bar and walked up to him.

"Jak, how are you?" She stood beside him at the bar and Jak nodded his head as Marcurio walked up to the bar. "Marc, this is Jak... Jak this Marc, he is an old friend of mine."

Marcurio greeted Jak, but Jak gave a quick hand gesture and took another drink of his mead. "Jak are you drunk?" Fina asked.

"Not drunk enough." he replied.

"I'm going to change out of my armor. Marc watch him for me and make sure he doesn't get into trouble." Marcurio laughed and agreed to the request.

"She is great isn't she?" Marc gave a sigh, "It's been so long since I've seen her."

"Yeah, she is great..." Jak replied.

Marcurio leaned forward onto the bar, "So what's the story between you two? Are you?"

"We're just good friends." Jak explained.

"Oh. Interesting."

Marcurio began small talk with Jak and explained how he knew Fina from when they used to study magic in Cyrodiil when they were younger. Then he began to rant about how he was a master of the arcane and his skill in battle was unmatched. He also hinted that if Jak ever needed him he could be hired. Jak didn't pay much attention, he instead noticed the coin purse he had hanging from his belt. After a couple minutes Jak went to get up from the bar, but stumbled and Marcurio caught him before he fell.
"I think you have had enough to drink, at least until Fina gets back."

"Fine. Maybe you are right, I'll just go home now. Tell Fina I said bye." Jak made his way to the door, "Sucker." Jak smirked and put the coin purse in his pocket.


--------------------
My first short story - "A Thief's Ascension"
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Acadian
post Jun 19 2016, 08:17 PM
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Joined: 14-March 10
From: Las Vegas



Wonderful to see a Skyrim tale, BB, and thanks for sharing Jaks story!

No worries about being picked apart. Folks here might offer some gentle and constructive criticism as it becomes more clear what your objectives are. Overall though, youll find readers at chorrol really get how important encouragement is. The main thing is that you enjoy creating and sharing your story.

The screenshots are welcome to give us a good look at Jak and Fina shes adorable by the way.

A fun and unexpected twist at the end but, given the storys title, not at all out of place. Jak seems to not only be an accomplished cutpurse but his willingness to steal from a master of the arcane demonstrates some stones that rival those of Shor. tongue.gif


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Screenshot: Buffy in Artaeum
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Darkness Eternal
post Jun 21 2016, 07:46 PM
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Joined: 10-June 11
From: Coldharbour



Don't worry BretonBlood. We all start at some point, and you are off to a great start. As Acadian said its good to see a Skyrim story. The screenshots is a creative way of telling a story, I enjoy it. Fina is cute. I like her hair. tongue.gif

Heh. Seems like Mercurio missplaced his coinpurse in the end.

As Acadian said, just enjoy the story you created. There are tons of stories here and yours is another awesome addition to the Chorrol Library hehe. Looking forward to more of Jak's escapades!


--------------------
And yet I am, and live—like vapours tossed.
I long for scenes where man hath never trod
A place where woman never smiled or wept
There to abide with my Creator, God,
And sleep as I in childhood sweetly slept,
Untroubling and untroubled where I lie
The grass below—above the vaulted sky.”
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BretonBlood
post Jun 22 2016, 02:18 AM
Post #4


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Joined: 9-March 15



Acadian: Thanks for the support, it means a lot. I'm glad you like Fina, she is from a mod I installed.

And lol I think the mead gave Jak a little liquid courage to be able to pull such a stunt.

Darkness Eternal: Thank you, I'm glad my first start wasn't horrible. I'm glad you like Fina as well, her hair is one of my favorite things about her.


Just a note. I should have mentioned this in my first post, but this story is going to be somewhat awkward because I am taking little mini-updates that I did for it on the Bethesda forums and turning them into chapters. It's kind of hard to do because there are certain spots I would like to stop but if I did the chapters would be too short or too long. So bare with me on that. tongue.gif


Chapter 2



After the events of the previous night, Jak decided to not go to work the next morning and instead took his mother shopping to let her get something nice. They circled the market and stopped at the stands then Jak would wait quietly to see if she found anything she liked.

"You know Jak you don't have to follow me. Feel free to look around yourself."

"Okay mom. I'll just go wait over there." Jak left the market and leaned on the wall while his mother continued to shop.

"Well, well what happened to you last night? I left and when I came back you were gone." Fina leaned against the wall.

"Sorry about that." Jak said guiltily, "So what did you do last night then?"

"I just stayed and drank with Marcurio. It was fun, but I went there to see what you were doing since your mom told me you were there."

"Again I'm sorry, but at least it sounds like you had fun."

"It's okay. Marcurio got pretty drunk himself and started asking about my personal life, and then he got so rowdy that he lost his coin purse and was furious. Luckily Brynjolf calmed him down and gave him some coin."

"Oh really, that's crazy..."

"He actually thought you took it, but I told him you were too drunk to have done that, plus I know you would never do such a thing."

"Yeah. That sounds about right... I was pretty gone last night." Jak happened to look across the market and notice Brynjolf giving him a strange look like he wanted to talk. "I'll see you around Fina."

Jak crossed the market to Brynjolf's stand where he was talking about his Falmer blood elixir, that sounded too good to be true.

"Come into a bit of coin lately?"

"I..uh.. I don't know what you're talking about." Jak got nervous

"Don't worry lad. I won't tell anyone, in fact I was impressed with your little heist last night. You have talent."

"Thanks, I just wanted the coin for my mom, she deserves it."

"Understandable. How would you like to put that talent to good use?"

"What did you have in mind?"

"I want you to break into Madesi's stand and steal his ring. Once you have it, I want you to plant the ring in Brand-Shei's pocket that way the guards think he stole it."

"Why are we doing this to him?" Jak had to ask.

"Someone has paid to have Brand-Shei taken out of the picture since he has been sniffing around, but we aren't the Dark Brotherhood we just want him to learn a lesson by sending him to jail. When you're ready I'll create a distraction and you can get the ring."

Jak agreed and Brynjolf created a distraction by yelling for everyone to gather around to see his new merchandise. His distraction worked as everyone gathered around his stand to listen and Jak took the opportunity to sneak his way to Madesi's stand and began to lockpick. After a few moments he unlocked the stand and jewelry box and took the ring. Jak then made his way to Brand-Shei and hid behind his stand and some boxes and very carefully placed the ring in his pocket. As soon as Jak came from behind Brand-Shei's stand Brynjolf ended his speech and everyone went on their way.


"It seems I chose the right man for the job. And here is your payment. I'm surprised our plan went off without a hitch."

"Why is that?"

"Bah. My organization has run into a bit of bad luck, but that's just how it goes. But there is more gold in it for you if you're interested? My organization runs in the Ragged Flagon down in the Ratway, meet me there and we'll see if you have what it takes."

"I can handle it. See you there."

Once Jak finished speaking with Brynjolf he noticed a guard at Brand-Shei's stand interrogating him about the ring. Brand-Shei swore he had never seen it before, but the guard wouldn't hear it and threatened to take him to the keep as a lifeless body if he didn't come quietly. After meeting with Brynjolf in the plaza Jak decided it would be best to wait until nighttime to head to the Ratway. So once nighttime arrived he prepared himself.

"I'm just going to go for a walk mom. I'll be back soon."

"Please be careful, Jak. Remember not to go down to the lower level."

Jak didn't take his mother's advice as he made his way across the city and down to the entrance of the Ratway. He entered and side and overheard talking in the distance, so Jak decided to sneak up the source of the talking and found two men talking by a fire. One mentioned going to check the entrance so Jak quickly backed up and hid in one of the side passageways near the entrance. As the man passed by Jak jumped him and threw him into the other passageway and the man pulled out his bow while Jak hacked at him with his sword. When the archer eventually fell to Jak's blade, Jak decided to loot his body, and to sneak past the other one seeing as he had Jak beat in size. Unfortunately, the first two were not the only inhabitants in the Ratway Jak found out. He came to a dead end as the drawbridge was not lowered and below him was a Khajiit taunting him, the Khajiit turned to find a way up, but Jak put an arrow into him before he could do it.

Jak jumped down and noticed a locked gate to his left, and using his skill with a lockpick he picked it and made his way into the Ragged Flagon. It was not what he was expecting, but figured it could be worse. As he made his way closer he overheard talking.

"Give it up Brynjolf, those days are over. You, Vex, Mercer, you're a dying breed."

"Dying breed, eh? Well what do you call that?" Brynjolf said as Jak entered into the center of the Flagon. Brynjolf looked at the others and then approached Jak.

"Well colored me impressed lad. I wasn't certain I'd ever see you again."

"Getting here was easy." Jak lied trying not to disappoint Brynjolf.

"Reliable and headstrong? You are turning out to be quite the prize. Now that your hear though, how would you like to take care of some deadbeats for me?"

"Who are my targets?"

"Bersi, Keerava, and Haelga. The debt here is secondary, the real message we want to get across is that the we aren't to be ignored. But remember no killing, it's bad for business, so keep your blade clean."

"Okay got it, I'll handle the debts."

"Good, and if you need any information on your targets I'll be here."

Jak listened to Brynjolf on what we had to say about each of the targets and then made his way out of the Ragged Flagon and back home. The next day Jak awoke and left his house and went to collect the debt from Haelga first. Jak tried asking Haelga if she was going to pay the debt, but she refused, so he took Brynjolf's advice and used her Dibella statue against her by threatening to throw it down the well. Haelga agreed to pay the debt and Jak moved on to the Bee and Barb to talk with Keerava. Instead of going to Keerava knowing she would refuse like Haelga Jak decided to talk to Talen-Jei, who while disagreed with Jak's actions did not want to see Keerava get hurt and told him to mention her family back in Morrowind. With this information Jak was able to get Keerava to pay her debt and he left the Bee and Barb to pay Bersi a visit.

"Bersi, you and I need to talk."

"No, I know why you are here and I have the money. Here take it and tell Brynjolf he won't have any more trouble from me."

With the last debt in his possession Jak headed back to the Ragged Flagon to give it to Brynjolf. Jak sat down at the table with Brynjolf and placed the debts on the table, Brynjolf took the debts and was pleased with Jak's work.

The debts were collected and Brynjolf was impressed, "All the debts collected and you kept your blade clean. Well done, we could use more like you in our outfit."

"Word on the street is that your outfit isn't doing do well."

"We are running into a bit of a rough patch, but how about you keep doing your jobs and earning coin and I'll worry about the rest."

"If there is more coin to be made, then sign me up."

"Alright then, how about you follow me and I'll show you what we are really about."

Brynjolf stood up from the table and started walking away so Jak followed. After opening a secret passage in a cupboard he lead Jak through a door, and into a cistern. He followed Brynjolf to the center where a man was standing, Brynjolf introduced Jak and the man began talking about how much praise Brynjolf had been giving Jak and how he expected him to make them coin. He then began talking about Jak proving his skills by going to an estate, but Brynjolf objected to no avail. After his little speech Brynjolf reminded the man, named Mercer, and he welcomed Jak to the Thieves Guild. Mercer headed back to his desk while the other two began heading back to the Ragged Flagon, but Jak stopped.

"Brynjolf, I'm worried I'm not going to be able to go to Goldenglow estate and get what Mercer wants. I just started this whole new life of larceny."

"Don't worry about, lad. You don't have to it just yet, go talk with Delvin and Vex, they know their way around this place and can give you extra jobs to hone your skills. They can also train you as well. Just do a couple jobs and when your comfortable come talk to me about Goldenglow. Oh and one last thing, talk to Tonilia about your new armor."

With his mind at peace Jak took Brynjolf's advice and returned to the Flagon to talk to Vex, Delvin, and Tonilia. Vex made it abundantly clear that Jak was not there to replace her and that he needed to do what she said. Jak was pretty sure she was just trying to take advantage of him since he was new, but didn't say anything out of respect for her. He also picked up a job from her to steal an object from someone's house in Solitude. Jak then made his way to a man sitting at a table.

"Are you Delvin?"

"That's right. And let me guess, Brynjolf just plucked you up off the street and dropped you into the thick of things without telling you which way is up. Am I right?"

"Yeah, sort of. I guess I could use some advice."

"See, now that's the attitude of someone who wants to get rich and live long enough to enjoy it. We're going to get along nicely. Just remember to get jobs from me or Vex to help the guild get back on its feet."

"What do you mean back on its feet?"

"Look at this place, it's falling apart. A few decades ago this place was as busy as the Imperial City. The others think I'm daft for saying this, but I think we've been cursed."

"Cursed? By what?"

"The hell if I know. All I know is we need to spit in this curse's face and turn things around down here. So if you ever want to help get the guild back to the way things were and make some coin, come see me for a job."

After finishing talking to Delvin Jak asked which one was Tonilia, and Delvin walked him over to her. She introduced herself as the guild fence, lookout, and the watcher of Delvin's back. After introducing himself and selling some things to her Jak received his armor and left to change. With his new armor Jak left the cistern through the secret entrance ready to begin his new life.


--------------------
My first short story - "A Thief's Ascension"
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Acadian
post Jun 22 2016, 07:47 PM
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From: Las Vegas



It was funny how Marcurio never exactly figured out what had happened to his coin purse - thanks to Fina's unknowing help. So Jak graduates from private cutpurse to a full fledged member of the Thieves Guild. He does seem to have some talent for it.


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Screenshot: Buffy in Artaeum
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Darkness Eternal
post Jun 27 2016, 03:14 PM
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From: Coldharbour



Sorry, Mr.Blood. Due to the temporary issue with the website itself I wasn't able to comment or read. But I have time today.

Okay, it's good to see that our young protagonist is recruited into the Thieves' Guild. Being a good pickpocket, I guess that destiny- or fate- was to be expected. Keep him away from the Nightingales!

Let's see what is in store for him from here on out. I don't think his mother would be proud tongue.gif


--------------------
And yet I am, and live—like vapours tossed.
I long for scenes where man hath never trod
A place where woman never smiled or wept
There to abide with my Creator, God,
And sleep as I in childhood sweetly slept,
Untroubling and untroubled where I lie
The grass below—above the vaulted sky.”
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BretonBlood
post Jun 27 2016, 05:56 PM
Post #7


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Joined: 9-March 15



Acadian: I think he let it go since Brynjolf gave him some coin to make up for it... Otherwise Jak may not have gotten off so easy.


Darkness Eternal: No his mother would not be proud of him, but he is willing to do anything to give a better life to his mother, even if it means a life of thievery. They have scrapped by his whole life and he wants more.


Chapter 3


Jak returned home to rest before he would leave for Solitude.

"Jak, where have you been I've been worried sick about you? And where did you get that armor?"

"Oh... Brynjolf gave it to me as it's a gift, he wanted me to work for him and I agreed."

"What about your job at the Fishery?"

"This job will pay more than the Fishery ever did, mom. Trust me, it will be great for both of us."

After deceiving his mother about his new job Jak ate dinner and turned in for the night. He got up early the next morning and made his way to the carriage to catch a ride to Solitude. After finally arriving in Solitude very late in the night, almost morning, Jak entered the city to find a ceremony was being held for a man's execution. It was a lucky break because this would most likely keep the guards busy so he made his way through the city quickly, but silently and arrived at the house. Jak took a look around to make sure no one was around and then picked the lock. Once inside he crept slowly and quietly to find the golden horn he needed to steal. He was relieved when he found it, but petrified as the horn was next to its sleeping owner. Jak held his breath and time seemed to slow down as he moved as slow and stealthily as possible until he grabbed the item.

With the horn in his possession Jak left the house and made his way back through the city. He had never felt more alive in his life, but he also never felt more afraid as he walked past guards thinking they knew what he had done. As soon as he exited the city he took a sigh of relief and headed down the road to the carriage. Before reaching the carriage, Jak noticed a caravan of Khajiit and how they were staring at him with strange expressions until one motioned for him to come over. The others stared as he walked into their camp, and what looked like the leader began talking, "Come join us young one. You have nothing to fear from Khajiit, this one knows that armor very well."

Jak's nerves grew even worse and he almost made a break for the carriage, "I don't know what your talking about, my father gave me this armor."

"You can't fool this one, I know that armor when I see it. I too was once in the guild back in Elsweyr, granted our armor was a tad different. Sit with us Breton, this one can share stories and give advice."

Jak agreed and sat down to listen to the Khajiit's stories. He gave useful tips and tricks to being a good thief and even through in some lockpicks for free. Jak thanked the Khajiit and made his way to the carriage where he paid to head back to Riften.

Jak arrived in Riften early in the morning and immediately headed for the secret entrance to the guild, his confidence was through the roof after completing his first job so he walked with a certain arrogance as he arrived in the Ragged Flagon. He found Vex eating breakfast.

"I completed the job. Here is the drinking horn you asked for."

"Good job, now what do you want a prize? We're thieves, not children."

"I just thought I did a good job since it was my first burglary."

"You'll be amazed at what people just leave laying around, sometimes it won't be that easy though."

Jak's confidence had been lowered after talking with Vex and decided to instead take a job from Delvin. He offered him a bedlam job to go to Windhelm and steal 500 gold worth of items, and told him not to let Vex get to him she was once a beginner as well. So after taking the job Jak returned to the cistern and took a nap to get some rest after his long journey across Skyrim. He awoke a couple hours later and left the cistern to return home to see his mother. He made his way past the steps of the Temple of Mara, but was caught by an old friend.

"Jak? Where have you been, it's been days since I've seen you?" Fina ran down the stairs.

"Oh you know the usual, always busy. What are you doing outside of the Temple?"

"I was just relaxing thinking about Lady Mara because I have begun worshiping her." She showed Jak her amulet.

"Worshiping her? Why now?" Jak was perplexed.

"Because I believe in all that she stands for, love and compassion. We could use more of that around here. Anyways, I talked with your mom and she said you quit your job at the Riften Fishery?" She paused, " And I like the new armor where did you get it?"

"I did quit my job at the fishery, something better came along. And you like it? Brynjolf offered me a job and he gave me this armor."

"Brynjolf? I noticed you talking with him the other day in the market... the day Brand-Shei got arrested."

"Yeah that was when he offered me the job, with Brand-Shei out of business he asked me to be his assistant to help with his business since more people would likely buy his merchandise."

"Okay. Just be careful Jak, I've heard some things about Brynjolf... not good things, and I don't want you apart of it if they are true..." She stepped forward and hugged him.

"Me?Come on, I'd never do such a thing."

Jak returned home and spent the rest of the day with his mother. The next morning Jak got up early to leave for Windhelm, but was stopped on the way by Shadr who asked him for some help regarding Sapphire. He explained the situation how Sapphire conned him and now he didn't have the money to pay her. Jak agreed to help and headed to the Bee and Barb where Sapphire hung out.

"Hey Sapphire, I need to talk to you."

"Oh, if it isn't the new guild member. What do you want?"

"I want to you to drop Shadr's debt."

"Why would I do that? I have already made enough from him, anything else is just a bonus."

"Exactly, you made enough from him, so you don't need to extort him for more."

"I see what this is, you want a cut don't you? Or do you plan to rat me out?"

"I guess you leave me no choice. I'm telling Brynjolf about this."

"Okay, let's not do anything rash like that. Just tell Shadr the debt is off and leave it at that."

With the good news Jak returned to Shadr at the Riften Stables. "You're no longer in debt to Sapphire." Jak held out his hand to shake Shadr's. He was ecstatic that he no longer had to pay Sapphire and rewarded Jak by giving him a horse that he had found wandering around Riften. Shadr brought the horse out saddled and Jak let her sniff his hand and he stroked her mane. And with his own horse Jak no longer needed to hire the carriage and left for Windhelm on horse. His journey was uneventful other than coming across another khajiit caravan and some Vigilants of Stendarr. Eventually, he arrived in Kynesgrove with Windhelm in the distance, so he stopped to rest a little and then continued to Windhelm where he stabled his horse and walked the bridge to the city.

Once inside Windhelm he came across a woman being harassed by two Nords, so Jak stepped in to defend her.
"Oh, look, our spy has a little protector."

"How about you leave her alone, and be on your way."

"Are you looking for trouble, Breton?"

"No, I just don't like your attitude."

The Nord bet Jak he could beat him in a fight for 100 gold and Jak accepted. He got a few good hits on in before Jak retaliated, but then the man pulled a dagger out. "You cheating bastard!" Jak yelled. The Nord would swing his dagger, but Jak was faster and would move and land a few punches. He sliced Jak once, but in the end the Nord took one wrong jab and Jak took the opportunity to grab his arm and pull him close while elbowing him in the face with all his strength causing the Nord to fall to the ground. Jak stood over him demanding he pay before he ended up in the river outside Windhelm. Afterwards, Jak approached the Dunmer woman to ask if she was okay.

"Yes I'm fine young man, but you are wounded."

"I'll be fine, it's just a scratch."

"Nonsense, here take this healing potion, I was going to sell it in the market, but I can always make another one. Please." She handed Jak the potion and he drank it.

Jak thanked the women and asked where the inn was. She directed him to the building behind her and he headed inside Candlehearth Hall to rest and wait for nightfall. It was the middle of the night when Jak left Candlehearth Hall. He stepped out into the cold night air of Windhelm, shivering he was surprised by how cold it had gotten. Jak began walking the streets of Windhelm to find a good house to rob, avoiding being seen by guards that patrolled. He finally came to a house and decided it was the one and within seconds he had picked the lock and entered. Jak was a little disappointed that the house looked so empty, but started his burglary by taking some potions he had found on the shelf, and next he went upstairs. He had hit the jackpot when he noticed a lone silver jeweled necklace sitting on a table, it was almost too easy, but Jak picked it up and knew it would be all he needed to sell for more than 500 gold.

So with the necklace Jak left the house and hurried through Windhelm. Staying in Windhelm would be too risky in case the owners of the house went to the guards about their missing necklace, so Jak left Windhelm and mounted his horse. He knew it was unwise to travel through the night back to Riften and since Kynesgrove was close enough to Windhelm, but far enough that guards might come looking he stopped there and rented a room. Although he had a room, sleep was hard to come by as Jak was nervous about the theft, he still had not adjusted completely to his new life of larceny. In the morning, he left Kynesgrove and on the way came across a strange Khajiit that talked nonsense and practiced his blade skills by killing wolves that attacked him on his way back.

Back in Riften Jak stabled his horse and then made his way into the city and to the secret entrance. Delvin was walking around the Flagon talking with Tonilia when Jak stopped him.

"So you're back. I suppose you have completed that bedlam job."

"I did complete it, here this necklace should be more than 500 gold, along with these potions." Jak handed over the necklace.

"I'd say you did a bloody good job, this necklace is worth about 800 gold. You keep this up and you'll be rich in no time."

"Thanks. If you have any more jobs I'll take one."

"Sorry Jak, I don't have any, but you might want to check with Vex."

"Alright, thanks Delvin."

Jak checked in with Vex who did have a job for him. Vex wanted him to go to Windhelm and place a stolen garnet in one of the residence's homes. Jak reluctantly accepted the job as he was not excited to go back to Windhelm so soon. After leaving the guild, Jak headed back home, and the next day got up to return to Windhelm. He saddled his horse, and prepared to leave when he heard someone clear their throat behind him.

"So, where are you off to today? And since when have you owned a horse?" Jak turned around.

"Just a job in Windhelm. You like her, Shadr gave her to me after I helped him out, but I still don't know what to name her." Jak paused, "I take it you got a job from the Jarl since you are all geared up." Marcurio walked up as Jak finished talking.

"I did get a job, and Marc is coming with me. We are actually going to Windhlem too. Do you want to travel with us?"

"Uh, no I'll be fine just riding there myself."

"But it will be fun, I'll pay for the carriage.."

"Fina, if he doesn't want to come with us he doesn't have to." Marcurio cut in.

"Shh!" Fina waved her hand at Marcurio, "Come on Jak, please."

He couldn't argue and instead agreed to ride with Fina and Marcurio to Windhelm so he unsaddled his horse and put her back into the stables while Fina paid for the trip. Jak let Fina get in the carriage first and then Marcurio stepped up and sat next to her, so Jak got in and sat across from Fina. The trip was awkward as Jak didn't have much to say and felt like a third wheel, even though Fina wanted him there. Marcurio talked with Fina most of the time and Jak would glance over, but would look away and watch the scenery, and Fina would try to include him in the conversation. After a long trip they arrived in Windhelm and they walked up to the gate where a guard told them not to make any trouble due to recent events in the city. Jak wanted to rent rooms at the inn that way they could rest, and so he could go complete his job, but Fina wanted to walk around the city and explore instead.

After walking around the Grey Quarter they walked across the plaza and came across a gruesome scene causing Fina to gasp.

"We should go to the inn now, we don't need to get involved in what is going on here."

"No, we should see what is going on, maybe we can help." Fina said stubbornly.

"I actually agree with Jak on this." Fina gave a quick look to Marcurio and Jak and then went down the stairs and the two looked at each other and then followed her.

"Hold it, this is a crime scene, just keep it moving."

"What happened here?" Fina asked.

"We had another murder, that's the third one. Poor Suzanna, she just served me a drink at Candlehearth Hall a few nights ago, but I can't say I knew her."

"This is the third murder? Aren't the guards doing something about this?" The guard explained how they were trying to investigate, but with the war they were spread thin and Fina continued to question him. Jak noticed an old man watching Fina who then looked at him so Jak looked back at Fina. The guard then told Fina if she wanted to help she should question the witnesses since he had to clean up the body before the rats got to it.

So after talking to the guard Fina went to each witness, and questioned them about what happened and what they saw. She returned to the guard who was not surprised they had not witnessed anything useful and told her that if she wanted to help any further she needed to talk to the Jarl's steward, Jorleif, in the Palace of the Kings. Fina gathered with Jak and Marcurio to tell them their next move, but Jak insisted that they go to the inn to rest, it had been a long trip and they hardly be any help if they were exhausted and could not think straight. Fina finally agreed and they all went to Candlehearth Hall and rented rooms and slept most of the day. Fina awoke before the others, much to Jak's displeasure as he wanted to finish his job without the other two around, and so they headed to the Palace of the Kings to talk with Jorleif. He was glad to accept Fina's help with finding the murderer since most of his guards were stretched thin, and with his approval Fina wanted to go back to tell the guard and investigate the crime scene.

"Fina, wait. We can't do this yet."

"What are you talking about, Jak?"

"I need to complete my job I was sent here for, but I don't want you investigating this murder alone. So while I go make my delivery can you go stay at the inn until I return."

"No way! There is a murderer on the loose here and we can't wait and hope he doesn't strike again. Besides I still have Marc with me. We can continue without you for now." Jak had a look of fear and disappointment on his face as he stared at Fina.

"Don't worry Jak, I'll take care of her. You go make your delivery, and I'll keep her safe." Marcurio smiled and put his arm around Fina.

"See, I'll be fine Jak, just go do your job and then meet back up with us, it shouldn't take you that long."

After a few moments Jak agreed to the plan, "Alright, just be careful."

Jak watched as the two of them headed off in the direction of the crime scene and then went his own way to the house he had to place the stolen garnet. He noticed one of the Thieves Guild symbols, from the book Shadowmarks, outside the house and then he began to pick the lock. Jak was nervous about breaking into the house in the afternoon as he was much more conspicuous, but he pushed the feeling aside since he wanted to finish as fast as possible and get back to Fina. So once he finally picked the lock and was inside he found a chest and placed the garnet inside and then made his way out without anyone noticing. Jak made his way to the crime scene, but Fina was not there, and upon asking the guard he said they had gone to talk to Helgrid in the Hall of the Dead. The guard pointed Jak in the direction of the Hall of the Dead and once there he only found Helgrid, who told them they had left a little while ago, so Jak was at a lost as he stepped back outside into the cold air of Windhelm. As he stood wondering where Fina had gone he noticed a blood splotch on the ground; Jak leaned down and examined it and noticed that there was a trail. He followed the trail carefully and as fast as he could not knowing whose it was, or where it ended up, because nightfall was coming quickly.

Eventually the trail ended outside of a home. Assuming that the source of the blood was taken inside the house Jak went to the door and was surprised to find it unlocked, so he quietly slipped inside, where he found even more blood. The feeling of dread was beginning to set in and Jak feared the worst when he heard a scream from the back of the house.


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My first short story - "A Thief's Ascension"
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Acadian
post Jun 27 2016, 08:50 PM
Post #8


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From: Las Vegas



Gosh, Jak’s been a busy young thief, traipsing all over Skyrim! He’s got a horse though - woot!

Plenty of thiefy quests and now he’s involved in a Windhelm murder and possibly an awkwardly triangular thing with Fina and Marcurio. . . .

Frankly, this episode was too much of a good thing. At 3250 words and 60 screenshots, it was simply too much to do justice to in one presentation. My advice would be to break the story into smaller, more bite-sized pieces (still posted at about one per week). Too much at once invites skimming instead of savoring and you surely don’t want that. smile.gif


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Darkness Eternal
post Jun 30 2016, 12:54 AM
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Like Acadian said, Jak has been keeping himself occupied. To make septims, you have to hustle around, right? Good to see him coming along the way and managing to become a traveler. I like how casual Jak told everyone about the armor. I got a kick out of that. First his mother, and then the khajiit(there's no fooling those cats) and then his lady friend. Good that Jak had some pointers from the khajiit thief, and some free lockpicks too. They'll come in handy.

So we come to a mysterious murder scene. I don't know but I have a feeling Jak may come across some trouble here. Or trouble may find him.

At times when one tries to improve their life they often get caught up in trouble. Jak wants a more comfortable life for him and his mother, and is not above stealing to obtain that. It is the small things like these that set him or people like him in a greater destiny.

As Acadian said, 3000+ words is a lot. Hell, 2000+ words is a lot and I am guilty of writing over that. Still training to do so. It takes self control on our part, hehe. But truly, 1600- words are great for a chapter.


--------------------
And yet I am, and live—like vapours tossed.
I long for scenes where man hath never trod
A place where woman never smiled or wept
There to abide with my Creator, God,
And sleep as I in childhood sweetly slept,
Untroubling and untroubled where I lie
The grass below—above the vaulted sky.”
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BretonBlood
post Jun 30 2016, 04:38 AM
Post #10


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Joined: 9-March 15



I'll probably respond to you two when I write the next chapter, ala the way I've learned from Darkness Eternal lol. But figured I'd mention that yeah I didn't plan for the chapter to run so long, in fact all the chapters after this one are in fact shorter. What I did was copy and paste the parts I wanted and then as I got like 80% done with linking the pictures I was like, "....this is too long... It's too late to turn back now!" Hahaha so I kept it all in. Don't worry though that is the only long chapter I believe. Sorry about that.

Also, just a note, as you guys say Jak has kept busy. Remember that these updates jump around and don't show all the travelling details he goes through. Like when he goes to Solitude and comes back that's at least 5 days he's gone from Riften. So he isn't really doing jobs like day after day because he is travelling.

This post has been edited by BretonBlood: Jun 30 2016, 05:01 AM


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My first short story - "A Thief's Ascension"
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BretonBlood
post Jul 6 2016, 08:25 PM
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Acadian: Again I am really sorry for the length, I kind of got more than 3/4 through it with the pictures and was like this is just too long but there is no going back now. The rest will all be shorter than the last one.

But yes Jak has been a busy thief, he has been to Windhelm and Solitude, so it's been a busy couple weeks for him as a new thief, but it's good for his learning experience. And yes now with his horse he can save some coin on carriage rides haha.

Darkness Eternal: Hahaha I am glad you liked him being upfront about his armor, but he is still lying to both his mother and Fina, neither of them know Brynjolf is part of the Thieves Guild. So while Jak is telling the truth that he got it from Brynjolf, he didn't tell them he is working for the Thieves Guild now, he is still lying because a lie of omission is still a lie.

No doubt, trouble will find Jak... and it may lead to a greater destiny. winkgrin.gif



Chapter 4


Jak ran to the back of the house, weapon drawn, ready for anything. He rounded the corner and found Fina on her hands and knees.

"Fina!" He carefully stepped into the room, "Are you all right? What happened?" He sheathed his dagger and helped her up.

"I'm fine. I just noticed that this wardrobe had a false back and when I tried to open it I slipped and fell in here."

"My heart stopped for a second, I thought the worse had happened. Why are you alone? Where's Marcurio?"

Jak got his answer when Marcurio came around the the corner spells ready but put them away once he saw the two of them. Jak, irritated, turned around and pushed Marcurio.

"Where the hell were you? Why weren't you watching her?"

"I was upstairs looking for clues!" Marcurio quickly replied.

"You should have been with Fina. For all you know the murderer could have been in there, and he could have killed her!"

"Jak, stop!" Fina came out of the room and got between him and Marcurio, "He was upstairs because I told him to look up there for clues."

"And what if the killer was in there waiting?He could have caught you off guard and killed you. Marcurio should have thought of that and stayed with you instead!"

"I can take care of myself." Fina rebutted, "In fact, I know how to use a blade better than both of you so there is no need to worry about me being in danger. And there is no reason for you to get angry at Marc when he was just listening to what I told him to do. I mean you're acting like I am useless, Jak."

"That's not it all, I am just trying to make sure you are safe. You are my best friend Fina, and I don't want anything bad to happen to you."

"Well, I'm glad you are worried about my safety Jak, I really do appreciate that... But you have been overprotective of me this whole trip and you don't need to be that way. We were investigating this murder just fine without you... I don't want you to get in the way of us investigating because you're worried about me or fighting with Marc.... maybe you should go." She glared at Jak, and he stood there for a moment.

"Fine.. But don't ever ask me to join you again. Enjoy each other's company." Jak turned and walked out of the house.

Jak was furious as he walked through Windhelm, and rather than stay the night in the inn he just paid the carriage to go back to Riften. Once he arrrived in Riften he went straight to the guild and turned his job in to Vex. He left without taking another job, much to Vex and Delvin's disapproval, but instead of working a job he wanted to get a drink. Jak went to the Bee and Barb and drank for the rest of the day trying not to think about Fina, but even after all his drinking and attempts to forget he still could not help but think about her safety.

Jak woke dazed from his drinking antics the night before confused as to how he got into the cistern of the guild. Looking around, he rubbed his face before getting up and checking in with Delvin and Vex. He was feeling overconfident now after successfully completing several jobs and wanted to test his skills by taking two jobs at once, so he talked to Delvin who gave him a numbers job in Solitude. After he got the job from Delvin he got some advice from him on how to sneak around better and then he went to Vex who gave him a sweep job in Windhelm. He was not excited to go back to Windhelm, especially after what happened with Fina, but he had also just gone there two times previously so Jak figured he would start with Solitude.

Walking through the cistern Jak noticed some of the other members nodding their head at him, so he took the time to meet them since he had not done so the last couple times he had been in the cistern. First, Jak met Cynric Endell, Rune, and Thrynn, who all congratulated Jak on his accomplishments so far and said if he needed anything just ask, they then went about their business and started talking about how Thrynn used to be a bandit. Moving on, Jak also met Vipir, who everyone referred to as Vipir the Fleet, and he congratulated Jak as well and told him if he needed pickpocket training to come see him. Knowing that he had guild mates that could help hone his skills made Jak a little more comfortable about future jobs, and so he moved on and found the last guild mate.

"Hello, there, I'm..."

"Jak. Pleased to meet you." The wood elf cut him off, "I'm Niruin, everyone has been talking about your success so far, it's astounding to say the least, keep it up. Oh, and if you ever need help with your archery skills I am happy to assist you."

Niruin shook Jak's hand then turned around to lay in his bed, so Jak left the cistern. With both jobs in progress, he wasted no time getting to his horse and saddling up for his long journey to Solitude, with a few stops along the way in Falkreath and Rorikstead Jak arrived in Solitude around mid day. Seeing as he could not pull of his numbers job while Angeline's Aromatics was open Jak headed to the Winking Skeever, and listened to the bard as she sang and played her instruments and smiled any time she looked at him. Night had fallen and with it Jak left the Winking Skeever and made his way towards Angeline's Aromatics. Guards patrolled the streets with torches so he hid until they walked by and then sneaked to the door of the shop and picked the lock. Once inside, Jak noticed an array of potions and ingredients; this was an opportunity he could not pass up, so he robbed the shop of all it's merchandise. Jak then quietly made his way up the stairs and found the book he needed to forge the numbers in. As quick as he went in, Jak was just as quickly getting out without any problems. He left Solitude and stopped by to see his caravan of Khajiit friends where he shared his success so far with the guild. After a quick chat Jak left the caravan and got back on his horse to make his way to Windhelm.

The journey was easy, and took a couple days with a stop in Whiterun along the way. Once in Windhlem, Jak felt a certain anguish towards the city after what had happened last time, and so he made his way through the city with hardly an upwards glance until he found the house he needed to rob. Of course, with it still late in the afternoon Jak had to wait, so he went to the Genesis Cornerclub since he had not been there yet, and once the time was right he made his way back to the Shatter-Shield home. He picked the lock, which seemed easier than other locks to Jak's surprise and made his way inside. It was a beautiful home, obviously of a rich family, so Jak had no qualms with robbing the place. He found the first item he needed to acquire in the bedroom to the left, it was challenging since one of the owners was sleeping the room, but it was nothing Jak couldn't handle. The second item was on top of a bookshelf, therefore making it trickier, but Jak carefully climbed on one of the shelves and grabbed the item from the top before stepping down quietly. Jak knew the third item had to be upstairs and so he made his way up there only to find a surprise...A woman was in the room immediately at the top of the stairs, and Jak's heart skipped a beat as he slid to the side to get behind the wall. His heart was pounding, not sure if she had seen him or heard him and so Jak quickly looked around the corner and found that she had not seen him, but noticed she was stealing the very item he needed to return to Vex. He thought fast and figured he would stop her by the front door and get the item back, as it would be too risky trying to get it in the room with the owner sleeping.


Jak waited downstairs and never heard her coming, but as soon as she walked around the corner he stepped forward.

"I need that golden candlestick..." Jak whispered trying to look intimidating. The woman quickly turned, surprised by Jak, and put her hand on the hilt of her blade.




Author's Note: Sorry that the Windhlem murder didn't end how you were expecting. I had planned to have something interesting happen when I was writing the story two years ago, but I was in the middle of moving back to school so I just decided to rush it and have Fina and Jak have a falling out and thus end Jak's involvement in that quest. Sorry if you were expecting some grand thing like the killer had Fina trapped and was about to kill her or something. But it opened up new doors when I continued Jak's story.


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My first short story - "A Thief's Ascension"
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Acadian
post Jul 6 2016, 10:33 PM
Post #12


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Joined: 14-March 10
From: Las Vegas



Heh, I see that Fina is teaching Jak what happens when one tries to hold/restrain a butterfly.

Some drink and another pair of jobs should help busy his mind and hands.

A smooth trip and job in Solitude. Gosh, I smile whenever Lisette looks at me too! happy.gif

Back to Windhelm again. . . and an unexpected turn of events.


The prime requisite here is that you enjoy what you are posting. My comments about post length were simply lessons learned for consideration. As far as how you dealt with the murder investigation in Windhelm, that was just fine. It was, after all, Fina’s ‘quest’ not Jak’s. How it relates to Jak is not in the details of the quest but how it affects the tense little trio of Jak, Marc and Fina – and you certainly did justice to that. smile.gif


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Screenshot: Buffy in Artaeum
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Darkness Eternal
post Jul 7 2016, 02:13 AM
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From: Coldharbour



No problem in the murder scene. On the contrary to what you may think, it was unpredictable, which made it great. Jak is going well through the Thieves Guild . . . and is it only me that wants him to hook up with Vex?

Heh, I think anyone walking around Windhelm would feel some measure of anguish.

As Acadian said, the plot served well to show more of the three. Plenty of character development going along the way and this is good.

I'm eager in seeing where Jak will go next.

Jak trying to look intimidating made me laugh, and the woman's hand in her blade means there may be a fight coming. Time will tell. Maybe he can whack her with the candlestick and make a run for it biggrin.gif


--------------------
And yet I am, and live—like vapours tossed.
I long for scenes where man hath never trod
A place where woman never smiled or wept
There to abide with my Creator, God,
And sleep as I in childhood sweetly slept,
Untroubling and untroubled where I lie
The grass below—above the vaulted sky.”
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BretonBlood
post Jul 12 2016, 04:03 AM
Post #14


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Joined: 9-March 15



Acadian: I'm glad you brought up the post length because I definitely took it into consideration as you guys would know more about that than I would. So thank you.

Yes, Jak definitely saw what happens when he tries to be overprotective of Fina, which is ironic because she truly could beat both Jak and Marcurio in a sword fight, she could take both at the same time and still win. Assuming Marcurio can't use magic of course. Fun fact, the creator of the mod for Fina made her so that she is deadly when dual wielding, so I kept that in the story, she actually kicks ass despite being so young.

Some drink and jobs is exactly what Jak needs, Fina is his only real friend as he was always a loner and they have known each other for years, she is his best friend. So naturally he cares about her and wants her safe, so her safety weighs on his mind. But nothing some good old fashioned jobs to keep his mind busy.

I'm glad you picked up on the murder being Fina's quest because that was what I was going for.


Darkness Eternal: Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed the unpredictability. I think Jak has awhile to go before he ends up getting in Vex's good graces, she's also a good 10 years older than he is so that doesn't help his case. tongue.gif

Jak is definitely knew to trying to look tough, I mean he has grown up working for the Riften Fishery how tough can he really be? Haha. He could use the candlestick, but Jak isn't much of a fighter, he prefers any form of resolution that isn't violence unless he knows he is in danger.


Chapter 5



The strange woman tightened her grip on the hilt of her sword and slowly started to unsheathe it as to not make much noise.

"Whoa whoa, you don't need to do that!" Jak whispered in a frantic tone.

"Why not?" The woman asked with her hand still on the hilt.

"I am not here to hurt you... I just need that golden candlestick you stole from upstairs."

"You're crazy if you think I'm going to give this to you. No way, I took it, go find something else of value to steal."

"Alright, we can settle this, but lets go outside first. Okay? I promise I am a friend, a fellow thief like you."

The woman nodded her head and followed Jak out of the house and around the corner where no one would see them. Jak turned around to make sure she wasn't making a run for it only to have the woman pull her blade out and point it at him.

"I don't trust you. So no funny business or your head will be rolling on the ground, got it?"

Jak agreed and pleaded his case, "Please, I really need that candlestick. I was sent here by the Thieves Guild to retrieve three items and that is one of them. I have been doing so well with the Guild so far, I don't want to disappoint them now."

The woman looked Jak over and thought for a moment, "What will you give me in return if I give it to you?"

Jak shook his head, "I don't really have anything of value to give you, but I'll make a deal with you. I'll give you half of what I make from this job if you give me the candlestick... And let you tag along with me on any jobs and give you half the gold I make."

The woman slowly lowered her sword and sheathed it, "You have yourself a deal... but don't think this makes us friends, we are business partners, nothing more... My name is Arissa."

Arissa handed over the golden candlestick and Jak introduced himself and shook her hand then the two made their way to the gate. While Jak wanted to leave Arissa wanted to stay and he didn't feel like arguing so they headed inside Candlehearth Hall. Jak went to pay for the rooms while Arissa looked around.

"Would you like to rent a room?" The innkeeper asked.

"Yes... make it two please." Jak walked back over to Arissa, "So you aren't going to try to kill me and take my stuff are you?" he asked jokingly.

"I'm not really the killing type..." Arissa replied sarcastically, "But I'll think about it." Arissa smiled and then the two headed off to their separate bedrooms.

After several hours of sleep the two met back up and left the city. Much to Jak's surprise Arissa had her own horse, but didn't want to ask how she got it, so the two set off for Riften. Along the way they came across a fellow thief who protected them from a wolf, they nodded at each other and went their separate ways. It was night time when they arrived in Riften, after stabling the horses they entered the city. Jak stopped to show Arissa his home, but she did not care and made fun of the fact that he lived with his mother, so they moved on towards the Guild secret entrance.

"I think you should wait out here while I turn in my jobs."

"I have friends in the guild you know, like Sapphire, so this place isn't a secret to me. Besides you don't get to tell me what to do in this business partnership." Jak just sighed and the two entered the cistern. Luckily Arissa saw Sapphire and the two of them began talking so Jak took the opportunity to head to the Ragged Flagon. He turned his jobs into Vex and Delvin, both praised him and suggested he talk with Brynjolf about Goldenglow. Jak knew it was time to tackle Goldenglow estate and so with a deep sigh he approached Brynjolf.

"Ready to do Goldenglow, lad?" Brynjolf paused and raised an eyebrow as if expecting a witty response, but none came, "Goldenglow is a bee farm owned by a wood elf named Aringoth. We have a very important client who wants to send him a message. It's a difficult task, are you sure you are up for it?"

"I'm ready, just tell me what I need to do, and I won't disappoint." With that Brynjolf gave Jak all he needed to know on Goldenglow and how he had to make sure to only burn down three of the hives, unless he wanted to end up on Maven Black-Briar's bad side. He also told Jak to check in with Vex who could give him some useful tips since she had previously gone to Goldenglow. Jak did as he was told and found Vex, she told him about a secret tunnel that she used and mentioned it should be unguarded. Arissa was waiting for Jak when he got back into the cistern and the two left; Jak took her to the Bee and Barb and paid for a room for her to stay in and then Talie-Jei escorted them to the room.

"Don't get any funny ideas now that we are alone..."

"What? No, that's not why I brought you in here...." Jak continued, "I have a very important task to do and I am going to need your help, so I got you this room so you have a place to stay tonight."

"Oh... Thanks." He then explained to her the whole situation with Goldenglow and how they would meet up tomorrow outside of Riften to go scout out the area and then sneak onto the island at night.

Arissa agreed to help saying it would be an easy job and Jak left to return home. He was welcomed by his mother who had not seen him in days and so he helped her cook dinner and the two sat down to enjoy their meal they cooked.

"This is wonderful mom, you are the best cook in all of Skyrim."

"Thank you, Jak. I'm glad you like it." Just then there was a knocking at the door and both looked at the door, then each other, so Jak got up and went to the door. He asked who the person and to his surprise it was Arissa. Jak muttered a few curse words under his breath and rolled his eyes.

"Jak, don't be rude let the person in, I raised you better than that." Jak opened the door and let Arissa in, who also surprised Jak's mother.

"I hope I am not interrupting anything." Arissa mused.

"We were just about to have dinner, so maybe you should come back tomorrow..." Jak replied.

"Jak hush! Show some manners to our guest. She didn't interrupt and she can join us if she likes. And who might you be?"

"She is just someone I met in Windhelm recently, she travels Skyrim and decided to come to Riften after I told her about some of the stuff going on here." Jak spoke up.

"Really? How come you didn't mention her to me earlier, she sounds so interesting. Please, join us for dinner, there is more than enough. And your name is?"

"Arissa, ma'am. Thank you for the invite, and can I say this is a lovely home you have." Jak stood there thinking to himself, By the gods, why is this happening?

"Why thank you, Arissa. I am Lanier, Jak's mother, now please come sit. You too, Jak."

They ate their meals and Arissa talked with Jak's mother about her travels and how she had seen most of Skyrim and threw in more compliments every now and then making Lanier blush.

"Jak, you should have her over more often, she is so delightful."

Jak looked up from staring at the table, "I wish I could mom, but she is only in town for a little while, it's unfortunate really." He gave Arissa a look telling her not to say anything so she didn't and once dinner was over Jak's mother said goodbye and Jak walked Arissa back to the Bee and Barb. He explained how he was impressed with her antics, but also asked for no more surprise visits in which she just laughed. The two eventually agreed to meet outside Riften the next day and then went their separate ways to get some sleep.

The next day Jak left the city in the afternoon to wait for Arissa, and about an hour passed before she finally showed up.

"What took you so long?" Jak grinned.

"You didn't tell me where to meet you outside the city. I had to walk along the wall of the city to find you, so you are lucky I even showed up at all." Jak laughed lightly and shrugged.

They headed for Goldenglow estate, and followed along the river bank until they were able to see the bridge leading to the island. Jak pointed to Goldenglow and said that was their target, but Arissa explained how she already knew where Goldenglow estate was.
"Well then, I hope you don't mind getting wet because we are going to have to swim over there to avoid being seen." Arissa was not happy about it, but she agreed to do it. They swam across the lake and ended up on a small island close to Goldenglow; Jak realized that Brynjolf and Vex were not exaggerating about Aringoth tripling his guards as mercenaries were all over the the island. Jak and Arissa continued around the island as the sunset and eventually found a sewer grate which they assumed was the one Vex had told Jak about it.

"Alright, I need you to wait here while I go burn the hives."

"No way! I'm not going to miss out on all the fun, I'm going too." Arissa whispered.

"Arissa, please. I need you here in case I get seen. I can make a quick getaway without them knowing about you."

"Fine." Arissa rolled her eyes and crossed her arms.

Jak continued onward until he found a spot where he could climb up the rocks easily to the hives. He snuck around the wooden wall guarding the hives and then quietly lit a torch. He moved quickly as he burned all the hives with his torch and it wasn't long before the mercenaries noticed the fire and smoke rising, but by the time they had arrived Jak was already gone. He met back up with Arissa and the two of them entered the sewer grate. It didn't take long for them to come across some skeever, but they dealt with them easily enough and moved on. Where there is one or two skeever, there are about a dozen more and as they continued through the sewers they came across more, but this time Jak noticed oil on the floor and a lantern that was hooked up to a tripwire. So he sliced the tripwire and backed up quickly with Arissa as the floor and the skeevers were set ablaze. Once the fire died down they continued and found a locked door with a chest inside, Jak showed off his lockpicking skill by picking both the lock on the door and the chest which impressed Arissa. They reached the end of a hallway and they entered another room with skeever and began to kill them. As Jak killed one skeever, Arissa killed the last one and without noticing the body broke a tripwire causing a flail to come hurling towards her.

"Look out!" Jak grabbed her and pulled her backwards causing the them to fall to the floor.

"Whoa, that was close. Thanks Jak, I owe you one...." She paused, "Jak?"

"I'm glad you're okay, but I'm going to need a minute..." Jak rolled onto his side holding his lower region after being at the receiving end of the hilt of Arissa's blade.

After Jak recovered, they continued through the sewer and found a ladder that led back up to the island, and luckily right next to the entrance to the manor. So while Jak picked the lock Arissa kept watch, and in no time they were inside Goldenglow estate. They both decided that rather than going and getting the key from Aringoth and risk having all the mercenaries on the island knowing where they were, they would instead just go straight for the safe and just pick the lock. They moved silently through the house and Jak picked a lock of a door that led to the basement while one of the mercenaries walked to the other end of the hall to talk to a group of mercenaries eating at a table. Once in the basement, Jak and Arissa sneaked by two more mercenaries, but came across another that could not be passed without him noticing, but just like in the sewer there was oil all over the floor so Jak lit a torch and quickly dropped it on the oil setting the mercenary on fire. With him dead it was a clear shot to the safe, and when they got to it Arissa wanted to show off her skill in lockpicking so while she unlocked the safe Jak unlocked the chest next to it.

Arissa handed Jak the content that was within the safe and the two left through a sewer grate that was in the basement. It was the same one they had used previously, so it brought them right back outside of the house and they snuck to the boat that was docked on the island and stood there looking at Riften in the distance.

"I think this is the start of a great partnership." Jak nudged Arissa.


Author Note: Sorry this one ran long again. I swear I had checked prior and it was only 1600 words but this ended up being 2300. Geez.. sorry your guys.

This post has been edited by BretonBlood: Jul 12 2016, 04:05 AM


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My first short story - "A Thief's Ascension"
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Darkness Eternal
post Jul 12 2016, 08:14 PM
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The former fisherman was quite surprised when Arissa threatened him. Glad he didn't resort to violence. So, in agreeing with the share from the candlestick, they become buisiness partners. After getting some rest in seperate rooms, the two set off. Arissa struck me as quite dependent here, with her own horse and all. She really can hold her own, it seems.

Having Jak bring her over to mom was just hilarious. If his mother had any idea what was going on . . .

Quite the partnership indeed, having succesfully infiltrated the estate, set a mercenary alight. I see a lucrative future for these two cool.gif


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And yet I am, and live—like vapours tossed.
I long for scenes where man hath never trod
A place where woman never smiled or wept
There to abide with my Creator, God,
And sleep as I in childhood sweetly slept,
Untroubling and untroubled where I lie
The grass below—above the vaulted sky.”
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Acadian
post Jul 14 2016, 07:29 PM
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This was a delightful introduction to Arissa. If she is from the mod of the same name, not only is she a great follower but you’ve captured her personality perfectly. It is great to see that Jak has someone to share his adventures without the triangular drama of Fina and Marcurio.

Let them burn – be they hives, skeevers or mercenaries! evillol.gif

Jak’s story is a pleasure to read and is coming along nicely. You may want to consider expanding your reading list to include more of the excellent fan fiction tales here in order to benefit from exposure to differing styles and techniques. Additionally, there is no better way to garner and maintain the support of other writers.


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BretonBlood
post Jul 20 2016, 05:11 AM
Post #17


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Darkness Eternal: Indeed Arissa is very independent. We will find out more about her in the next chapters.

Actually Arissa kind of just showed up, he had no intention of letting Arissa meet his mom... at first.

And you may be correct. Thanks for reading.


Acadian: Arissa is in fact from the Arissa the wandering rogue mod, she is easily one of my favorite followers. And thank you, I tried my best to learn her personality from how she acted and talked in the little time I had her with Jak when I was playing him.

And you know, for the last several weeks I really have been wanting to read some of the other fan fiction stories on here as they look very interesting, I just have been very busy because I am taking summer classes to catch back up. But I definitely agree, I would love to read others stories and see how they write and what not.



Chapter 6



After swimming back across the lake the two entered the city and made their way back to Brynjolf. Jak went ahead to talk to Brynjolf while Arissa hung back.

"Word on the street is Goldenglow got hit hard, and that you could see the fire from the city. Good job, lad."

"It was easy enough, and here is what was inside the safe." Jak handed over the note and gold. Brynjolf was surprised to find that Aringoth had sold Goldenglow to an unknown buyer with a strange symbol for their signature, and then explained how Maven didn't like being cut out off deals and her payments.

"Speaking of payments." Jak spoke up.

"Ah yes, smart as a whip. Here you go, lad. One more thing, Maven has asked to see you, she mentioned you by name."

"What does she want to see me for?"

"That's between you and Maven, and I prefer to keep it that way. Don't be worried though, it's just business most likely, just don't keep her waiting."

Jak left Brynjolf and returned to Arissa and gave her half of the payment from Brynjolf.

"Thanks... can I ask you something, Jak?" She paused for a second, "I need your help with something, and it's very important to me. I need your help finding the man responsible for ruining my family, and destroying my life."

"Arissa, what are you talking about?" Jak paused and noticed a melancholy look that had come over her face, "I don't know what to say, but sure I'll help it's the least I could do. Why now, though?"

"I have known where he is for some time now, but I didn't think I could face him alone, but now that you are here, we could. I trust you enough to ask for help."

"I'm glad to help you out. Where do we need to go?"

"He is hiding out in a cave in Haafingar, near a stormcloak camp, like the skeever he is..."

Jak agreed they could head out there next, but he didn't want to make the journey without getting a job first, so he got a bedlam job from Delvin in Solitude. Of course, having over heard he was heading to Solitude, Vex asked Jak to perform a job she had recently gotten to steal an item from someone's home in Solitude, so he gladly accepted. Jak and Arissa went their separate ways to get some rest and met each other the next day. Before leaving Riften Jak wanted to talk with Maven, so he wouldn't keep her waiting and Arissa wanted to acquire some new armor and decided to meet up afterwards. After asking around, Jak found out Maven was in the Bee and Barb so he went there and found her upstairs.

"So, you are the one Brynjolf has told me about? Not very impressive looking to me."

"I might say the same to you. Your name carries weight, and I expected more." Jak retorted.

"Watch what you say, boy. I could have you thrown in jail, or worse..."

Maven continued and explained her job for him and how she needed him to put her competitor out of business. She did not like how quickly he had set up his establishment and told Jak to talk with a man named Mallus Maccius because he would give the details on what he needed to do. So with one more final warning from Maven not to mess up this job, Jak was on his way and met Arissa at the bottom of the stairs. She had acquired her new armor and Jak was impressed with it, so after exchanging a compliment the two left the Bee and Barb and the city. They decided to take the carriage to Solitude and Jak took this time to ask Arissa about what happened in the past with the man they were looking for. She explained how he had betrayed her family and sold them to the Thalmor, so they arrested her family, stole their land, and destroyed her life and after that the Nord disappeared and she tried to find him.

They eventually reached Solitude on a beautiful day, and naturally Arissa spoke up, "My father used to bring me to Solitude sometimes. It is a nice city filled with snooty types and nobles. But you know what they say, with nobility comes more lootability."

Arissa told Jak the way and he lead as they walked along the road. They came to a little path that strayed from the road, Arissa said that was where they needed to go and so the two followed the path and after walking down the hill they eventually found the cave. They stood for a minute, while looking around Jak noticed that Arissa's anger was rising and could feel her tensing up. She began walking towards the cave when Jak grabbed her hand, "Arissa, don't do anything rash, okay? This isn't a suicide mission." She simply nodded and Jak headed into the cave first.

Once inside they followed along the narrow cave and came to a big open space; Arissa was awestruck by it, but Jak was more focused on the wolves that inhabited the cave. They crept as close as they could before charging the wolves and killing them one by one until all laid dead, and even more came running from deeper in the cave when they heard the commotion. They took on each of them as they came in what seemed like waves and then continued through the cave until they came to a fork in the cave passage. "I say we go left." Arissa chimed in and Jak agreed. It seemed going left was the right way as it led them further into the cave, but both Jak and Arissa thought that may not have been as great as they thought, as they entered a another big open area there were egg sacs everywhere, and as they slowly made their way into the room spiders began descending from the ceiling and walls. Arissa quickly started attacking the ones that had dropped down to her right nearby and so Jak carefully maneuvered around the poison they shot and took them out by circling around them and swinging at them as fast as he could. Once all the other spiders had been killed a giant one descended from an opening in the ceiling, Jak and Arissa tried to confuse it by attacking from opposite sides. The tactic worked until the arachnid spit poison at Arissa barely missing causing her to trip. The spider turned to attack her but Jak was quick enough to jump in front of the spider and stab in the eye killing it.

Jak helped her up and the two of them looked for a switch to open the gate to move forward. They could not find a lever and Arissa commented on how it may be a secret switch, and she was right as she pulled down one of the torches next to the gate causing it to open. It wasn't long after the gate that they ended up in another room, but this one did not have spiders or wolves, but instead a man standing on platform. He did not notice them enter the room and so they both slid to the side behind a wall. Jak looked at Arissa who was breathing heavily and noticed a crazed look in her eye, and shook his head telling her not to do anything, but she did not listen and ran out towards the Nord.

"Come down here and fight you coward! You will pay for what you did to my family!"

Jak ran out behind her as the man drew his battleaxe and ran down the ramp towards her. He was slow in his movements as he was older and so whenever he swung his giant battleaxe they would dodge and then begin their barrage of slashes against the old Nord and he eventually died by Arissa's blade. She smiled as she stood over his body, then as she looked up she noticed some journals sitting on a chest near his bed. She pointed it out and began walking towards the chest when suddenly the whole cave shook and part of the ceiling fell to the floor.

"Arissa we need to get out of here now! This place is coming down!"

"No! I need those journals to prove my families innocence!" She ran up to the chest and started grabbing the journals.

Jak ran up and grabbed her and they ran to a gate on the other side of the room. They opened the door with a key already in the gate and Jak ran forward looking back to make sure Arissa was following him. He turned at the last second to find the way they were going had ended and was instead just a ledge with a long drop into a dark pit. Jak suddenly stopped himself and slid right at the edge, but doing so caused the ledge give out making him fall but he grabbed little rock and held on for his life.

"Jak!" Arissa came to the ledge and tried to grab Jak's hand unsuccessfully before laying down and trying to reach a second time, "I can't reach you! You need to boost yourself up so I can grab your other hand."

"Alright..." He looked down into the abyss of the pit, his heart pounding out of his chest.

Arissa counted to three and Jak tried to boost himself up to grab her hand when the rock he was holding broke.

"No!" Arissa cried out as he plummeted into the pit.

This post has been edited by BretonBlood: Jul 22 2016, 05:40 PM


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Darkness Eternal
post Jul 22 2016, 04:27 PM
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So, Arrisa has a favor for Jak, it seems. Vengeance upon the man who destroyed her family and sold them out to the Thalmor. And Maven Black-Briar, quite the person Jak got involved with. He's going places, and man is he brave to act snippy with Maven laugh.gif

And from wolves to spiders to the man himself. A daring battle, and how well that it ended with Arrisa delivering the kill blow. Vengeance is hers. I don't think Jak ever planned for an adventure like this.

Wow and we are left with cliffhanger as Jak fell.


Nit: "Before leaving Riten Jak wanted to talk with Maven, so he wouldn't keep her waiting and Arissa wanted to acquire some new armor and decided to meet up afterwards."

I think you meant to say Riften.


--------------------
And yet I am, and live—like vapours tossed.
I long for scenes where man hath never trod
A place where woman never smiled or wept
There to abide with my Creator, God,
And sleep as I in childhood sweetly slept,
Untroubling and untroubled where I lie
The grass below—above the vaulted sky.”
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BretonBlood
post Aug 5 2016, 05:07 AM
Post #19


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Joined: 9-March 15



Sorry for the hold up. I planned to write a chapter last week on Tuesday because I was going to be leaving for the beach from Wednesday until Saturday, but I hurt my back Monday and was laying around trying to recover and I finally was able to set up my computer and get back on this.


Darkness Eternal: This is definitely more than Jak planned for when he teamed up with Arissa, but he is a nice person and is willing to help those in need. He doesn't like taking orders from a condescending Maven, he will have to be careful though. Lol

It couldn't have ended better for Arissa, getting the revenge she so long craved. Funny enough, when playing that part of her quest she actually did get the final blow as I tried to kill him with Jak so I went with it.

Fixed that nit.


Last time: After having decided to join up and become a team of thieves Jak and Arissa taken on Jak
s task of infiltrating Goldenglow Estate. After successfully returning the two recieve their reward and rest up. Despite only knowing Jak for a little while, Arissa slowly trusts Jak enough to share some of her past and ask for his help in seeking revenge against a man who wronged her family. The two find the man and kill him, and try to escape the collapsing cave the man was hiding in. However, Arissa was left watching Jak fall to his peril into an abyss after a ledge gave out...

Chapter 7


Jak awoke in a strange place as he slowly opened his eyes and his vision cleared. Having no clue where he was or what had happened after his fall he sat up and noticed he was in a tent when Arissa walked in surprised to find him awake.

"Arissa!" he jumped up excited to see her, "Where are we? What happened in the cave?"

"Jak, you should probably sit down and rest, you may not be fully healed." Jak objected and reassured her he was fine and so she continued, "Okay, well after you fell I didn't know what to do so I somewhat panicked and I didn't know what was at the bottom of that pit... and so I jumped. I figured it was the only way out and I wanted to make sure you were okay. I don't know what happened, but you must have hit the water head first because you were out cold when I landed in the water, so I grabbed you and pulled you out of the water. We were in a giant cave or something with a dwarven lift to the surface so I dragged you to the lift and when we got to the surface I had no idea what to do with you while you were out cold."

Jak nodded along as she continued, "I wanted to get help in case you were seriously injured, and this Stormcloak camp was nearby so I brought you here."

"But you are an Imperial, how did they let you into the camp?"

"I have a way with words." She smiled, "I told them we were attacked by Imperials and they believed me so here we are."

Jak was amazed by what he had missed and Arissa's courage in saving him, so after thanking her he decided they should leave the camp and head to Solitude, but not before thanking the Stormcloak general for his hospitality.

"Don't worry about it. We are not lawless brutes who act like animals as the Imperials would have you believe. Good luck in your journeys."

So with that the two left the camp and headed back to Solitude to complete the jobs they were given by Vex and Delvin. They arrived in Solitude late in the afternoon and headed to the Winking Skeever to wait for nightfall, they grabbed a table and ordered some food and drink.

"So how are you feeling? You know, after all that happened and killing the man who betrayed your family, are you alright?"

"I'm okay, it's good to know justice may finally prevail."

"That's good." Jak paused for a second, "Do you mind if I ask what happened in your past?"

"I guess I can tell you, it's the least I can do after all you have done for me. It's a long story though, are you sure you want to hear it?"

Jak nodded and Arissa began to explain her life long story of how her family owned a rich farm with a bunch of land and how her family would be paid for supplies for the Imperials and the Aldmeri Dominion. Then, after some time a Thalmor by the name Vidric came to their farms in hopes of buying the land, but her father refused and so Vidric sent the man they had just killed named Gunnher to pose as Stormcloaks who would protect them from the Thalmor.

"Of course, Gunnher and his men did nothing but cause trouble and one night I followed one of Gunnher's men to this farmer's house where he started demanding bread and ale. Then he tried to touch the farmer's wife and..."

"Things got ugly." Jak finished her thought.

"Yes, the farmer and his wife fought back, and I watched as Gunnher's lapdog killed both of them. I ran as fast as I could to hide as the rest of the people from our land gathered at the house demanding answers for what had happened. I couldn't let it go on any longer so I stepped forward and told the truth about my father accepting aid from the Stormcloaks so he could keep the land... but this was all part of Vidric's plan and he had Gunnher, his men, and my family arrested and then he seized our land claiming imperial right."

"I'm really sorry, Arissa. That sounds horrible. Why didn't they arrest you?"

"They tried, but I fled to Skyrim and became a wanderer from village to village. I was raised to be a nobleman's daughter, but ended up a cutpurse. I had lost everything that was dear to me and it was all my fault."

"You can't blame yourself for what happened."

"Tell that to my angry 18 year old self, I blamed myself plenty. I was angry, confused, and had no purpose, and all I did was wander Skyrim that was my life for the last ten years... until I met you."

"Me?"

"Yes, you have shown me what it is like to have a purpose again, and to help those who need it. So thank you, Jak."

"I'm glad I could help."

The two ate their food and drank their drinks and before they knew it night had fallen. They left the Winking Skeever and made their way to the house they needed to rob; Jak asked Arissa to wait outside and keep a look out while he went inside, so he picked the lock and entered the house. The golden ship was nowhere to be found downstairs so he quietly went up the stairs and found the ship on the end table next to the sleeping owner. He moved slowly and steadily eventually grabbing the ship and then made his way out of the house. With Vex's job done all they needed to do was steal 500 golds worth of items, and Arissa wanted to be risky and convinced Jak to go to the Blue Palace and steal what they needed there. They arrived at the Blue Palace and Arissa commented how she felt under dressed and felt she needed something more radiant. Guards were posted all along the entrance so Arissa distracted the guards with playful banter and Jak was able to sneak by. Inside, he went from room to room and stole potions and coin purses and eventually met his goal. He returned to Arissa and she said goodbye to the guards who appeared lovestruck by her and the two left without any trouble, and with all they needed they left the city to head to Whiterun for Maven's job she had given Jak.

They paid the carriage driver and hopped into the back for their journey to Whiterun.
"I have been to Whiterun quite a few times, I know just about every brick there is to know in this city... that may or may not include Dragonsreach's dungeon." Arissa said as they got off the carriage outside of Whiterun. Jak laughed and the two made their way up the hill into the city. It was mid afternoon when they entered the city, they watched some children running in the street as they made their way to the Bannered Mare where Jak was told to meet Mallus.

"Which one do you think is Mallus?" Jak said as they entered the Bannered Mare. They asked around and finally found him sitting in the room to the side, he was a pale man who looked sinister. Jak introduced himself and told him that Maven had sent him. Mallus gestured for him to sit and so he did.

"I was expecting you to come alone." Mallus looked at Arissa and then back at Jak.

"She can be trusted, she is with me."

"Fine." Mallus sighed and then began explaining his plan. He wanted them to go to the brewery and help Sabjorn with a skeever problem that he had caused, that way they could poison the mead for the tasting the captain of the guard had planned at the meadery. He then went on about how the clever part of the plan is Sabjorn was going to be giving them the poison to get rid of the skeevers, but they would also use it in the mead. "Sabjorn has already closed up the meadery today so he can prepare for tomorrow, so you will have to get there in the morning to perform the job, because the captain of the guard will be there in the afternoon." Mallus said before Jak got up and he and Arissa left the room.

The two of them wandered in the market a little while and then went to see the Gildergreen tree in the middle of Whiterun before returning to the Bannered Mare. They sat around the fire and drank mead, ate food, and listened to the bard as he sang his songs and played his instruments. It had gotten late and the two decided it was best to pay for their rooms and get some rest for tomorrow.

"I would like to rent two rooms for the night."

"I'm sorry, we only have one available, everything else is full."

"Really? Well..." Jak began to think.

"We'll take it." Arissa spoke up.

"We will?"

"Yes, we don't have any other choice." Arissa stepped forward and handed Hulda the gold and she showed them to their room, then left.

Jak looked around the room and then checked out the balcony while Arissa took off her armor. He then came back into the room and checked the side table for some gold just in case, and Arissa laughed at his greediness.

"So how do you want to do the sleeping arrangement? I can sleep on the floor and you can have the bed, I don't mind."

"Or.." Arissa pushed him onto the bed and removed his hood, "We could share the bed, I mean it's not like we are strangers anymore."

"Yeah, I guess we could... it's just, won't that be a little awkward?"

Arissa chuckled, "You don't get what I'm saying here do you?" She leaned in and kissed Jak.

"Wow... I don't know what to say, I mean I thought we were just business partners?"

"We are, but to be honest I find you physically attractive, I have since we first met in that house in Windhelm... I also feel like you have done so much for me like save my life, help clear my families name, and shown me what it's like to have a purpose again. And after all this you have asked for nothing in return."

"You don't need to pay me back in this way, you have done your fair share of helping me too."

"I am not doing this to pay you back, I am doing it because I want to. What I just said was some of the reasons I have become attracted to you even more, outside of your appearance."

"Okay. But what..."

"Shh." Arissa placed her finger on his mouth, "You are over thinking this, lets just have fun."





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My first short story - "A Thief's Ascension"
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Darkness Eternal
post Aug 8 2016, 08:37 PM
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Well, I hope you recover well, BB. Yikes!

To fall into blackness and wake up in a nice cozy bedroll. Hmm. Good to know they made it back in one piece. And man has Arissa been through some tough times. A Stormcloak sympathizer.

Mallus looks scary as hell. Not the type of man I'd want to bump into a night or find waiting for me in a dark alley. But while he's creepy, I think Jak will forget all about that once he's in a nice warm bed with his friend. Seriously, the dialogue had me smiling. The moment he was notified there was no room with a double bed available I saw at once what was going to happen smile.gif

hubbahubba.gif(Clickable emote)

So, Jak's buisiness partner wants to get busy. What a way to end the night, and the chapter!

This post has been edited by Darkness Eternal: Aug 8 2016, 08:39 PM


--------------------
And yet I am, and live—like vapours tossed.
I long for scenes where man hath never trod
A place where woman never smiled or wept
There to abide with my Creator, God,
And sleep as I in childhood sweetly slept,
Untroubling and untroubled where I lie
The grass below—above the vaulted sky.”
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