Teresa of the Faint Smile, Adventures of a Stringy Bosmer Options

[Glargg]

This is a wonderful tale to read. Teresa is a fully believable character, so conflicted, and so much more sure of her failures than of her successes.

Found a nit:
'"Prole!" she hissed. "You're nothing but an orphan from the gutter. You're real mother didn't want you, did she?' Them ol' "your-you're blues" hit us all from time to time.

[Grits]

Oh, what a terrible dream. I'm glad that Teresa is already thinking, that is not Tadrose. I also wonder what she will do next.

[liliandra nadiar]

I'm going to go with... "ouch".

Had those moments/dreams where someone you respect/care for belittles you. Really not fun. ;_;

[Acadian]

I won’t say I enjoyed it any more than Teresa did, but this dream was superbly written. Easy to follow (that is good), clearly and directly relates to what we know is going on with her, yet full of wonder, mystery and awash with a dreamlike feel. It is a hard balance to achieve, and you nailed it.

’Tadrose grinned like a wolf sizing up a baby elk. ‘
Even in her dreams, Teresa sees her world through the eyes of wood elf.

’Then a long trill of laughter trumpeted from Nerussa's throat.’
"You don't have a mother, do you freak?"
’I'm an aristocrat! You're just a prole. ‘
These are just three of many passages where all Teresa’s insecurities and doubts about her self-worth erupt to the surface.

I’m just so thankful she didn’t encounter a red-eyed Simplicia. . . oh dear Mara.

[McBadgere]

Bloody hell... ...

There were several confusing emotions and stuff brought forth from this chapter...Mostly summed up by the word "Neyaaargh!"...

Creepy, scary...Horny... ...And several other dwarves... ...Wow...

Sooooo good...So goooood!!!...

*Applauds*...

Nice one!!... ...

[Jacki Dice]

Good heavens! I think my New Years Resolution will be to stop falling behind in this wonderful story.

-ahem-

41.2

"Oh this isn't cold," Teresa breathed the slightly chilled air deeply into her lungs. "Just a crisp autumn morning."

"So says the wood elf," Tadrose shivered. "My people are made for warmer climes. I never saw snow until I came here. In Vvardenfell the mountains are bone dry year round."

And this is what I have to tell Wrothken. He loves it cold. Most of my lineage hails from the tropics. I can't stand anything below 80 degrees.


"Nasty pieces of work, those clannfears," Tadrose murmured.

Oh don't even get Lilitu started on the clannfear

"Never let religion enslave you Teresa," Tadrose said quietly. "Learn from my people's mistakes."

And don't get Lilitu started on this either!


41.3

Tadrose opened her mouth to say something, but closed it again a moment later. Her eyes moved from Teresa's, then down to her lips. Teresa felt the Dunmer's arms fold around her, and pull her even closer. Tadrose's lips hovered over her own, and her head tilted slightly to the side to prevent their noses from colliding. Teresa closed her eyes, and leaned her head forward ever so slightly to meet the dark elf's.

Yes...yes!

"Teresa!" A male voice rang out in the chill morning air.

No! -grumble, grumble-

"You did not know?" Tadrose laughed. "Catullus was the most - vigorous - of Cyrodiil's erotic poets. Just the thing to keep a man up in the coming winter nights."

Oops. Oh no, poor man! That's just not fair!


41.9

Unlike the others, his flesh still stood of its own accord. But his skin had turned bone white, and was already rotting off in many places. It appeared as if he had been dead for weeks rather than hours. Teresa saw small things wiggling within his chest, and realized that they were maggots when one fell out and crawled across the deck.

Oh my. When Clarissa "evolves" to that state she'll be lots of fun to describe!

Flames burst around him, and a sound issued from his rotting throat that made Teresa's teeth ache.


Ah, so I'm not alone in having my teeth get very offended at certain sounds!


41.10

Teresa's arms found their way across Tadrose's back and held her tightly. She leaned her head forward, and closed her eyes as Tadrose did the same. She felt the other woman's lips press firmly into her own. They were soft as the finest Akaviri silk, and filled Teresa's blood with rapture.

YES!!!! Finally!!!!

"Ahem." The sound of a female voice loudly clearing her throat cut through Teresa's ecstasy like a Daedric blade.

Oh.


41.11

"What damn it?" The wood elf felt her heart pounding in her chest. What was happening? What had gone so wrong? How had Tadrose gone from being her lover to a stranger in the span of moments? "Talk to me? Don't you feel anything for me?"

"I can't do this," Tadrose finally whispered. "Not again. Not with anyone."

...
.....
.......WHAT?! No, no, no!!



I knew it was too easy! Poor Teresa, maybe she'll come around! -sniff. sniff-


Edit: I was listening to this and it reminded me of Tadrose's possible point of view. -sniff, sniff-

This post has been edited by Jacki Dice: Dec 31 2011, 09:29 PM

[SubRosa]

Olen: I would say it is a little too early to say that Teresa hates Tadrose for being rejected. Although that will happen if things go on as they are now for long enough. You are spot in that being rejected did unleash all of her other insecurities. She still has not dealt with them, and like the Shadow always does, it waits for the most inconvenient moment to pop out and make itself known.


Glargg: You just described Teresa so well: full of conflict and always more sure of her failings then her successes.

Maybe I should just say "Yer" in the future.


Grits: I am glad someone homed in on that final paragraph, as I thought it was the most important part of that scene when I wrote it. Teresa has consciously acknowledged that her rampant insecurities are wrong. Now as you said, what is she going to do about it?


liliandra nadiar: Teresa says ouch too! I am glad her experience is something people can identify with, as I want Teresa to be a character we can relate to. A long time ago I said to Thomas Kaira that Teresa's time in Bravil would be the best of times, and the worst of times. This is what I meant.


Acadian: That baby elk line was one I worked on for exactly what you cited. That even in her dreams, Teresa is a creature of the forest. Even if an unhappy one right now.


McBadgere: "Neyaaargh!" is right. That sums up Teresa's feelings after that dream. Still, maybe it will act as a kick in the pants to get her moving in the right direction again?


Jacki Dice: Hi Jacki! I have Northern European genes, and I am getting tired of the winters now as well. That little bit of Tadrose complaining about the cold was a little bit of world-building. We know that Dunmer have a resistance to fire, so it made me reason that Morrowind is a hot place, like India. Taking someone used to that and putting them into a Midwestern winter is just brutal.

Too easy was right. But as Princess Leia said after they escaped from the Death Star "It's not over yet!"


Previously On Teresa of the Faint Smile: Our last episode found Teresa in the throes of a nightmare, where all of her insecurities about her race, being an orphan, and Tadrose's love, all came out to torment her. However, she awoke with the certainty that the woman in her nightmares was not Tadrose. Next, we find her musing over the experience the following afternoon.


Chapter 42.3 – What Do You Want?

Teresa walked along the back corridor of the guild hall with her head down. She did not notice the wanted posters that plastered either side of the hallway. Nor did she see the glowstones firmly planted in their sconces in the walls. All she saw were the toes of her shoes below her.

Had that just been an ordinary nightmare, she wondered, or had there been more to it? Was Raven - or one of the other spirit guides - trying to tell her something through the images? She knew that Tadrose was not like the woman in her dream. She knew it.

Or did she?

Teresa bit her lip. Could anyone truly love her? She was a nothing from the street, who did not even know her real parents, let alone her real race. She felt a lump form in her throat, and in spite of how much she resisted, she could not prevent her eyes from welling up with water.

"You're a damn fool, that's what you are." The muffled sound of Pappy's voice came to Teresa's ears. She stopped and looked around. He must have been talking to her after all. Then she noticed the door to the armory just a few feet away, and realized that the Colovian's voice was wafting through its wooden surface.

"You're throwing away the best thing in your life."

"You are no one to talk, chasing women - no girls - that are not even half your age." Teresa instantly recognized Tadrose's strident voice, and her heart doubled its pace. "Then you cast them aside once they bore you. Are you trying to convince yourself that you are still nineteen?"

"At least I'm not the one who kicks them to the street after falling in love with them," Pappy's voice increased in timbre. "And I'm sure not dumb enough to feel sorry for myself afterward!"

"It is none of your damn business!" Tadrose's voice grew even louder. "Stay out of my fetching life!"

"It's my business when it affects the guild." Pappy's voice lowered slightly, and became more of a rumble then a shout. "I just had to give a contract to Storm-Tail that by all rights should have been Teresa's. But I can't give it to her because she'll come back in a pine box. The same with you. You've both got your heads so far up your butts that you have to pull your pants down to eat."

"Don't tell me, tell her!" Tadrose cried.

"She's just a kid!" the guild commander insisted. "Of course she mooning over her broken heart. Nothing I say to her is gonna change that. But you've got no excuse. You're supposed to know better. Akatosh's balls, these kids look up to you! You get your head on straight and settle this. Because I'm not going to bury either one of you in the yard of that church!"

The sound of booted feet rose from behind the doorway. He was coming this way! Teresa realized that he would be at the door in moments. She turned her head and scuttled down the hallway toward the front of the building. The forester stopped short after just a few steps however, when she realized that Storm-Tail was standing directly in front of her.

The young Argonian wore his elven armor, and his father's Akaviri sword was strapped to his hip. He stared at Teresa with inscrutable orange eyes. Did he realize that she had been eavesdropping? How much had he heard himself? Had Ancondil been right, did everyone in the guild already know?

The sound of Pappy's feet shattered Teresa's indecision. Feeling her face flush with heat, she sped down the hallway past Storm-Tail. All the while she tried to not look like she was fleeing. She did not say a word to the Argonian. She was relieved when he said nothing in return. In fact, the young fighter stood so still that he might have been a statue.

Walking as fast as she could, Teresa swept down the front corridor to the foyer. Mounting the stairs, she made her way up toward the second floor. She met Chance on his way down. He was dressed in fine burgundy linen, and his hair was freshly trimmed and styled in the rows that the Redguards favored. The wood elf's nose even detected the scent of sandalwood cologne wafting from his dark, red-tinged skin.

"Have you seen Ancondil?" she asked, biting her lip. She knew that she owed the Orisimer an apology for how she had lost her temper the other night. The last thing she wanted was for him to be angry with her as well.

"I think he and Valerius are out riding." Chance thoughtfully ran one hand across his chin.

"Oh," Teresa breathed. She lowered her eyes to the steps.

The Redguard's feet moved down to the same step, and his voice became softer. "Teresa, I…" The wood elf looked up at him, praying that he was not going to say something about her and Tadrose. As if he had read her mind, the Redguard sighed. "Um, nothing. Sorry, I have to go meet Eutropia."

Then Chance was on his way, and Teresa turned to watch him trundle down the stairs. Damn, he did know. It was true. They all knew. What a fool they must think she was! How could she have let this happen? How did it happen? One moment Tadrose had been closer to her than ever before. Then the next she had become a total stranger. How had she botched things so badly?

"At least I'm not the one who kicks them to the street after falling in love with them" Pappy's words rose up in her memory. "And I'm sure not dumb enough to feel sorry for myself afterward!"

Was he right? Had Tadrose fallen in love with her? But then why had the Dunmer rejected her? Was Tadrose really sad because of it? Did she just feel guilty over what she had done? Or was it something else?

Teresa bit her lip, looking up the stairway, then back down again. None of it made any sense, and it was damn well time she changed that. She still remembered the Emperor's words to her: "Your choices lie ahead of you, starting this night. You will have to live with them for the rest of your days. So make them wisely."

It was time to make a choice, but how would she know the right one to make?

[Acadian]

So, we gain some limited and tantalizing perspectives from Pappy and Tadrose. This is difficult to pull off while staying in Teresa’s POV without coming across as gimmicky, but you pulled it off superbly in a totally natural manner. Still more questions than answers, but we learn that at least Pappy thinks that big T fell in love with little T. And I’ll put my septims on the guild commander. Fabulous how he revealed reassigning contracts based on the T&T. . . situation. I can imagine that Pappy is wishing his guild was an estrogen-free zone.

Speaking of Pappy, you’ve carefully crafted him, replete with beautiful flaws that make him as memorable as Volsinius or Ancondil. All three of these fellows just leap out of the page to grab your heart.

More questions than answers here, but I get the impression from Teresa that she is about to buck up and do something.

[Grits]

It was great to hear Pappy’s take on matters! Eavesdropping was the perfect way for Teresa to get an earful of Pappy’s opinion. When faced head-on with people, Teresa seems to easily come to the wrong conclusion. This way she was too busy listening to Pappy and Tadrose to hear her own self-defeating thoughts. At least for a moment, anyway.

Memories of the Emperor have given her courage in the past. I’m hopeful for Teresa's choice!

[Jacki Dice]

These are the chapters where I always have this image of Lilitu sitting there with a bowl of ice cream for them to share. Teresa can go on about Tadrose and Lilitu can go on about Vivica.

I loved the conversation between Pappy and Tadrose. It flowed perfectly.

[McBadgere]

Ah, after a couple of lengthy and intense ones, a quickie... ...

Brilliantly done...As ever... ...

Looking forward to seeing where's next...

*Applauds*...

Nice one... ...

[Olen]

Short, but I suspect one of the more important parts. You've done her moping around very well, the impression is certainly there enough to empathise but it hasn't had a chance to get stale as such sections can. Now I sense that she has realised that yes there is a problem but it won't solve itself. Whether it's Tadrose she speaks to, or a good facing of her shadow I'm not sure though I suspect both may be necessary for the other.

That she asked about Ancondil makes me wonder if she wants to talk to him. I suspect his advice might help her in making the right decision.

Excellent to see Pappy working away behind the scenes. He's too good a commander not to have known what was happening and to see how to sort it, both for them and for the guild.

I'm still not sure who's going to say the chapter title line though... can't wait to find out.

[King Coin]

I’m finally back from a trip to visit family and I can now sit back and enjoy Teresa without interruption.

42.2
Ugh, that first sentence really sets the scene like no other.

What a horrible nightmare! Every fear she has is formed into a terrible image of Tadrose taunting her. The last line brings me some relief though.

42.3
Ok, I know this is a serious chapter but…
You've both got your heads so far up your butts that you have to pull your pants down to eat.
You channel sergeant Hartman with that line!

Teresa seems to be improving though. Apologizing to Ancondil is a start. I’m sure the rest of the guild will be happy when they can stop tiptoeing around Teresa.

Teresa has spent enough time running, now it’s decision time! What will she do?

This post has been edited by King Coin: Jan 3 2012, 04:24 PM

[ghastley]

New mod just turned up on the Nexus - interesting title.

[mALX]

New mod just turned up on the Nexus - interesting title.

Lol, looks like an awesome mod, too !!! But what is "SNECK" ????

[ghastley]

Presumably an activity that doesn't Assist in the treatment with magical.

[mALX]

Presumably an activity that doesn't Assist in the treatment with magical.

I wondered if you clicked on that would she do a snorting type laugh, lol.

[SubRosa]

Acadian: Big T and Little T, I like that. I might start using it in the fic as well. It sounds like something people would say. Like you said, I wanted to give us a glimpse at what was going on in Pappyland, and Tadroseville. Overhearing an argument between the two seemed like the best way to do that, and keep it believable. I am sure Pappy is wishing his guild was an all Greek affair about now!


Grits: Teresa ain't been dropping no eaves! Honest Mr. Frodo! That was a very thoughtful observation on how Teresa's insecurities have a tendency to take over when she is face to face with people. You are right, when it is personal, her inner daedra like to rear their ugly heads. But when she is taken out of the picture, and made a bystander then it becomes impersonal.

And of course the Emperor has always been her guiding star. As you noted, his memory always gives her strength. We will see Teresa drawing upon his words again later in this chapter.


Jacki Dice: If it was not for Tadrose, Teresa might like to do more than just sit and eat ice cream with Lilitu!


McBadgere: When I think of a quickie, it is usually something a bit more pleasant!


Olen: As you suspected, Ancondil is next up on Teresa's agenda. Also as you thought, she is hoping he might help her sort things out, and decide what to do next.


King Coin: Of course I wanted to use a word other than butts in Pappy's tirade about where T&Ts head were. But the forum would not let me. One of the fun things about writing Pappy is that I can call up visions of R. Lee Ermey, and put his excellent saying to use.


ghastley & mALX: Neat! The same person released a Beth and Alicia mod just a little while ago too. There's a much older Claymore mod floating around out there too, that lets you use their armor and swords. I think they had them with the symbols of Teresa, Alicia, and Helen. And maybe "sneck" is a typo of "sneak"?


Previously on Teresa of the Faint Smile: In our last episode, Teresa overheard an argument between Pappy and Tadrose. The guild commander was berating Tadrose for falling in love with Teresa and then rejecting her, and told her to sort it out. Teresa fled the scene when she heard Pappy coming her way, but was seen by Storm-Tail, who said nothing. Later, she came across Chance, who also was plainly aware that there was something going on between Teresa and Tadrose. Next, she goes to find Ancondil.


Chapter 42.4 – What Do You Want?

Teresa stared at the wooden boards under her feet as she walked across the Larsius bridge. At one time Marius would have been there to greet her at the far end. But she would never be seeing him again. Except as a bloody rag doll in her nightmares. She glanced up to see who was there in his place, but did not recognize the Imperial. He must have known her though, given the sneer that crested the man's face before he looked away.

The fences and buildings of Bay Roan Stables rose up to the wood elf's left. She saw grooms of several races walking horses back and forth there, and the tapping of a smith's hammer came to her long ears. Other horses ambled lazily about the fenced-in pastures that surrounded the livery. The stallions stepped high and snorted loudly in their enclosures. The mares in the other pastures simply turned their heads, unimpressed with such antics.

Turning her gaze to her right, Teresa looked out across the long parade ground that stretched to Niben Bay. Folk of all races rode equally diverse horses in a circuit around its outer edges. Teresa's eyes picked through the herd of chestnuts, greys, blacks, and paints for the blue roan that she knew belonged to Ancondil.

After long moments she picked him out on the far side of the parade ground, with his emerald rider perched comfortably on the saddle above. The Orisimer was clad in high black boots, cream colored trousers, and an indigo doublet. Beside him Teresa noted Valerius in similar attire. The patrician rode the same black steed with feathered ankles she had first seen at the Wawnet Inn. The gelding's feet stepped high, and he bore himself with a grace and dignity few of the other horses could match.

Teresa waited, and watched the two men as they circled around the long field. So far as her uninitiated eye could see, both men seemed to be accomplished riders. At the very least she could tell that they were fully at ease on the backs of their respective mounts, and had no difficulty in steering the great animals around the field.

As the two men approached, she could see them chatting amiably with one another. Then Valerius pointed to where Teresa stood, and a bright smile lit upon the Nibenean knight's features. The forester was afraid of what she might see upon Ancondil's face, given her explosive loss of temper the other night. But the elegant orc appeared to be just as glad to see her as Valerius, and the two men brought their mounts to a halt before her.

"How does Magnus greet you this fine afternoon goodwoman?" Valerius asked in good cheer. Teresa had to resist the urge to blink. While he bore the same polished manners as Ancondil, he was always even more formal in public. She knew that was due to his being a patrician. Once she had envied the nobility for their wealth and station, as everyone did. But living so closely to Valerius had shown her the very real constraints that their birth placed upon patricians - how it forced them to live forever separated from everyone else in the world. She knew that she would suffocate under such rigid codes of behavior, and for once was thankful for being born a nobody.

"Indeed, it is a pleasant surprise to find you here Teresa." Ancondil followed the other man's greeting with his own. Then stretched down an open hand to her. "Would you care to join us for a circuit about the field? I assure you Glacier would be most appreciative of the company."

As if the reinforce his master's words, the blue gelding bobbed his head, and sniffed at Teresa's bodice. She put out one hand so that the horse could better get her scent, and the blue roan buried his muzzle in her fingers. After he had plenty of time to grow accustomed to her touch, she reached up and gently stroked the dark hairs that covered the side of his head.

"I don't think this is the best time for something like that," Teresa murmured. "Not that I do not appreciate the offer of course, or the company. I was kind of hoping we might have a moment to talk?"

"Why it should be my delight," Ancondil said. The Orisimer swung his massive frame from the saddle, and stepped lightly to the ground. He took the lead of his horse in one hand, and gestured to the livery across the road from them. Now Teresa noted that the brown leather of his saddle was engraved with flowing vines and blooming flowers. When he and Glacier stepped forward, she felt the strong pulse of magicka emanating from within it, and wondered what manner of enchantment the saddle might hold?

"I believe Fidelis and I shall take a few more turns about the field," Valerius said. "The exercise shall be good for our constitutions." The knight leaned down to whisper something into the ear of his black gelding. A moment later the powerful horse reared back, and lifted his forelegs from the ground and kicked out before him. Valerius let out a whoop of delight, and the pair took off down the field at a trot.

"Knights and their warhorses," Ancondil shook his head with a smile. "They just cannot help but to show off when a lady is around."

"But I thought both your horses were geldings?" Teresa wondered aloud as Ancondil led them to the stable.

"They are, but Fidelis and his master were both trained at the Anvil High Riding School," Ancondil explained. When Teresa stared back at him with a blank expression, the orc continued. "It is the finest riding school in Cyrodiil, reserved for training patricians and their steeds for war. Yet even if he had not been taught there, Fidelis is a Falkreathian. They are a proud breed. The ancestors of their line were Nordic forest horses bred with Alik'r desert steeds, the hottest-blooded of all horses. They have the strength of a draft horse, and the speed and intelligence of an Alik'r. Along with the Colovian warmbloods like the Morganus, they are the favored mounts of the knights and the legion."

"What about your Glacier?" Teresa asked. Taking a closer look at the horse, she noted that along with his head, mane, and tail, three of his lower legs were nearly coal black. But his rear right leg bore a bright splash of white. So did a single spot in the center of his forehead, just above his eyes. The rest of his coat was a grey so deep as to be nearly blue, with what seemed like tiny flecks of white speckled here and there.

"Why he is a Brumese Quarter Horse," Ancondil said as the blue roan's hooves clopped across the stones of the road. "His ancestors were an eclectic mixture of Barbs from the badlands of Elsweyr and riding horses from here in Cyrodiil. Though there was a Alik'r stud named Julianos who added his pepper to the mix a few centuries ago as well. Glacier is not quite as strong as a Falkreathian, but he is just as smart, and far more nimble. He also has a cow sense Fidelis and his brothers lack."

"Why is he a Quarter Horse?" Teresa asked through fuzzed brows. "He seems like a full horse to me?"

Ancondil chuckled. "That my dear, is because there are no faster horses in a quarter mile than my Glacier and his kin. Not even the Alik'rs can match them in a sprint. In Bruma the Quarter Horses work the cattle all week, and race on the weekends. They are a stockman's right arm."

"He seems a little, well, small for you," Teresa noted, comparing the horse to the massive frame of the Orisimer beside her. As she watched, the horse lowered his head, and rubbed one cheek against Ancondil's shoulder. With his free hand, the orc reached up to pat the affectionate steed upon the side of his head. "How can he carry you? I would think you would need one of those big horses like the farmers use."

"A Shire or a Percheron?" Ancondil said with a raised eyebrow. "I did indeed learn to ride upon a Vanner in Cheydinhal. She was a retired driving horse, and was a good teacher for a fumbling student such as myself. It was my father who acquired Glacier for me years later. He has a friend in the Bruma Mages Guild who aided him in the transaction. In fact, it was also my father who enchanted the saddle for me."

"So it is magic," Teresa said. "I thought so. What does it do?"

"Why it is a feather enchantment of course," Ancondil said. "Many saddles are enchanted so, including all those the legion and knights use. Mine removes four hundred pounds from the weight it carries. So you and I both could leap upon Glacier in full armor, and he would scarcely even notice."

Teresa whistled softly, staring back at the stock horse walking amiably beside them. His scent was strong in her nostrils. Like that of Barenziah, and all animals, it was a deep and pungent odor that instantly set Teresa at ease. It reminded her of the forest and its tall trees, meadows bursting with flowers, and the wild Larsius tumbling down the mountains. Reaching out with one hand, she stroked Glacier lightly along his withers.

This post has been edited by SubRosa: Jan 20 2013, 06:13 AM

[ghastley]

I like the idea of the feather enchantment on the saddle. It's these "everyday magic" touches that make the story complete, like using glowstones to avoid fires in the hayloft. Of course folk would do that if they could. The hard part is justifying why they do anything else.

[Olen]

A very horsey part. I'm impressed with the background the TF world has, it's hardly a surprise it has more or less supplanted the game one in my mind. The feather enchantment on a saddle makes perfect sense too.

Interesting that Valerius appears at this juncture. I supect Teresa won't be as delighted to see him, but he had the sense to carry on riding and let her speak with Ancondil. I do look forward to reading that conversation though.